One Final Taste
by Kitty Cullen-03
Summary: Edward can't stop Jasper at Bella's birthday party. He wanted more, and he took it. These are the repercussions of his actions.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: not mine!**

**Here it is! This is the alternate to One More Taste. You don't have to read that one to understand this one-in fact I'm starting from the very beginning. So for those of you who have read One More Taste you can bypass this chapter and the next, and skip right to chapter 3!**

The room was filled with candles and flowers. A large cake sat on a table in the middle of the room, surrounded by plates. I rolled my eyes. Surely Alice realized that only _one_ person here would be eating cake. She couldn't do anything half way! I listened to Edward practically pull Bella out of the truck, pleading with her. Something about not having celebrated a birthday since Emmett's last in 1935, and to please let Alice have her fun. Bella sighed. When she entered, everyone, besides myself, moved in for congratulations and birthday wishes. Even though she'd been over here a thousand times, Edward still wished for me to keep my distance. I didn't _really_ see the point-surely, if I was going to harm her, I would have done so by now.

I watched Alice jump and dance around Bella, eagerly pulling her over to the table with presents on it. "I thought I told you guys you didn't have to get me anything!" Bella said, blushing. Always blushing.

"I know, I know, but we couldn't help it! It's not every day you turn 18, Bella!" Alice trilled, still tugging on her arm. Bella cocked an eyebrow.

"How many times have _you_ celebrating turning 18, Alice?" She laughed.

"That's different. You only _really_ turn 18 once. I promise at your first pretend birthday I won't get you a thing." Edward cringed behind Bella's back. I could feel the anxiety, albeit a small bit, radiate from him in that instance. He didn't want Bella to become one of us. Quite frankly I couldn't see why. Wouldn't it be easier for everyone? No worries about blood, or hugging too hard, or breaking? And it's what she wanted, after all. Alice thrust a small silver package into her hand, grinning wildly. I couldn't help but smile-the joy pouring from my wife was almost intoxicating. She loved Bella like a little sister. Someone to dress up, and play with, and love. Bella rolled her eyes and started pulling on the package. I believe it was a CD from Alice, Edward and myself. Bella had forbid Edward from spending any money on her, so this was what he came up with. She didn't say anything to Carlisle and Esme, though. They got her plane tickets.

"Oops," Bella said, cringing. I hadn't realized that I crept closer until now. I smelled it before I saw it-blood. Bella had cut her finger.

I couldn't remember who I was, or why I wasn't allowed to harm this girl. After all, wasn't she our natural food source? The smell…oh God…it made my head swim. I had to have it. And if no one else was going to take it, it was their loss. I lunged.

"NO!" Edward roared, throwing himself in front of Bella. She tumbled into the table with the cake, smashing it to pieces and landing in glass. Her whole arm was open and bleeding. I rolled my eyes to her and tried to push my way past Edward. I could hear it pulsing from her arm. Her heartbeat was frantic. She looked at me, and fear clouded her vision. She should be afraid. As soon as I could get around these people, she was mine. Edward turned to call to Carlisle-his fatal mistake. I only needed a moment without his eyes on me-I spun through his arms and past Emmett before he could turn around. Closer. I knew I had precious little time.

"Jasper, NO!" Alice shrieked, trying to make her way to me. Sorry wife, not in time! I grabbed Bella's arm and raised it to my mouth. It was sweeter than anything should be allowed to be. I hadn't tasted human blood in so long…it was glorious. I let it flow, hot and sweet, as Bella struggled beneath me. Edward recovered in record time. I could feel him grabbing my shoulders, but I didn't care. The taste was magnificent-better than I had ever tasted. Emmett's arms locked around mine, finally breaking me free. Bella moved as quickly as she could to the other side of the room where Carlisle waited. I was being dragged outside. Why?!

Edwards face was brutal anger. He had me by the shoulders, gripping and snarling. I growled back in response. It was his fault-he brought her to me!

"Jasper, get a handle on yourself, man, or Edward's gonna rip you to pieces." Emmett said, still clutching my hands. Let him try.

"Don't tempt me, Jasper," Edward replied to my thoughts. My sanity was creeping back in, and I could feel his anger. It didn't help me. "You need to clear your head right now. Go for a run with Emmett. I can't talk to you like this." A run was probably a good idea. I needed to be away from the blood and the anger. It was too much like my past. I nodded. I could hear Bella in the kitchen, talking to Alice and Carlisle. I could still smell her. I felt Emmett tugging on my arm, sensing my reluctance.

"Come on, bro. We got to get you out of here. What were you thinking?" What a question. I thought about it as we picked up the pace, trying to phrase it just right. I loved running with Emmett-his emotions were always so…neutral. He wasn't angry, just bewildered.

"I wasn't. Thinking, that is. It just happened so fast. The funny thing is, I was actually thinking about how it was silly that Edward made me keep my distance from Bella. But when I smelled her blood…I couldn't stop myself." I shrugged. He would understand.

"I get that. I mean, don't take this the wrong way or anything, but how was it?" I chuckled. Leave it to Emmett.

"You have no idea. I haven't had it in so long it was like…nothing I'd ever experienced. And Bella…is sweet. Very sweet. God, she probably hates me now!" I didn't want that. I actually kind of liked her. She was kind, and smart, and trusting-that was her flaw. And Alice adored her. We stopped running and sat down on a bluff above the river. Emmett didn't say anything. I heard something in the woods.

"How could you, Jasper?" It was Alice. I could feel her before I could see her. Grief, anger, disappointment. Always disappointed in me. I slumped. "She's part of our family, and you try and…and…_eat_ her?"

"I didn't want to! It just happened so fast, and she was bleeding a lot, and oh, God I wanted it…is she okay?" I didn't know if it was my emotions or hers, but I was really starting to feel what I had done. I was feeling something else, something beyond remorse. I felt pity for Bella, but…I wanted more.

"She's fine. _You_ didn't do much damage. Edward is taking her home right now. She needed a few stitches, but there was no venom." She was still radiating grief.

"I'll have to apologize to her as soon as she's well. I really am sorry." Alice's face softened. Apologize I will do-and then I'll finish what I started. I couldn't believe I was having these thoughts! But I had never wanted anyone more than her at this moment.

"That won't be happening any time soon." Alice stated simply, pacing back and forth.

"What do you mean?"

"I saw it. Edward is going to leave her, to keep her out of danger. He thinks it's for the best. He'll stay behind a few days with her, but the rest of us will be leaving tonight." She sighed, still pacing. That wasn't good for my plan. Or maybe it was.

"I'm not leaving. You all can go as you like, but I'm staying behind. I need time to think." I said bluntly. Alice scrunched up her face in pain.

"What do you mean? You can't stay! What will I do without you?"

"I won't be long, I promise. Get everyone packed up, and go ahead and take off. I swear I won't leave the house. I just…need to reflect for a bit, you know?" I hoped she would buy that. I hated lying to her, but I had no other option. She nodded.

"Okay, I get it. Just don't leave the house, and come join us in a few days. Okay?" she ran to me and hugged me. I patted her on the head, and bent down to kiss her.

"Of course. I just need to get over this alone, I think. And then I'll be up-a week tops. Let everyone know I'll miss them and see them soon." I'd only have to deal with Edward for a few days, and he'd be so preoccupied with Bella that he wouldn't even be paying attention to me. And once he was gone, I would make my move. I had been to Bella's house before-witnessed Edward climbing her window. If I could promise her anything, I would make it quick.


	2. You Taste So Good

It was after midnight when I decided to go.

I could smell her when I hit the driveway. My mouth watered in anticipation as I climbed the tree outside her room to peer inside. The smell was intoxicating-better than I remembered. It took every ounce of self control not to leap through the open window and take her right then and there. At first glance, it looked like she was sleeping. I watched her for a moment, and realized she wasn't. She was sobbing quietly into her pillow. I let myself feel her, and then wished I hadn't.

I had never been in so much pain. Worse than pain was the feeling of abandonment, self loathing and pity. If I was interpreting correctly, she was feeling like she deserved this. Like she had it coming. I couldn't help but be mad at Edward right then, for doing this to her.

"Why? He's gone…he's gone…not good enough…no one loves me…" she was muttering while she rocked back and forth. Tears flowed seamlessly down her face, which was contorted with grief. Her brown hair was mussed, and I could see bits of earth wound up in the tangles. Why was that, I wondered.

I was torn. Part of me wanted nothing more than to rush into her room and comfort her all night-make all her pain go away. The other part wanted to end her pain in another way. If I bit her, she wouldn't hurt anymore. I balanced on this edge, undecided on which way to fall.

And then, as if she could read my mind, she muttered the phrase that would decide her fate. "I wish I was dead," she cried, clutching her pillow. I would be doing her a favor, then. I crept silently through her window and moved to the other end of the room. She didn't look up-she didn't hear me. I stood there for a moment and breathed in, reveling in what the smell did to me. I hadn't given myself over to this for a very long time, and I was drunk with the feeling. I promised her in my mind that I would be quick, and I would keep to that. Bella may be a human, but she's one that I knew on a personal level-I would grant her that much. She wouldn't see me coming until it was too late.

I inhaled again as I moved towards her. I quickly crouched and then pounced on the bed, throwing my legs on either side of her and grabbing her arms. A low growl escaped my throat at the feel of this hunt. Bella's head whipped to face me, panic in her eyes. I could see that through the tears. And her emotions were all over the place, but fear took center stage as she took in my expression. I dipped my head down and trailed my nose along her throat-this caused me to growl again.

"Jasper? What are you doing?" she was frantic now, and was beginning to struggle. I would have thought she knew better by now-it would do her no good. I didn't answer her as I continued to breathe her in. "Stop it." She whispered, struggling harder. Right-like I could stop _now._ I momentarily forgot that I promised to make it quick-I just couldn't help myself. I was the darkest kind of predator right now.

I licked my lips and brought my mouth to her neck. I kissed her first-I'm not sure why-and then sank my teeth into her throat. It was just as good as this afternoon. Better. Better than anything. I didn't care who she was, or why she was struggling, or what she was feeling. I didn't give a damn. Her blood pulsed hot into my throat, and finally, after how many years? My thirst was quenched. There never was anything as sweet as this. Her pulse was weakening, and the only thing I was worried about was running out. I never wanted this to end. I could drink from her forever.

And then it was gone.

Before I had time to register what had happened, I noticed the other vampire in the room. Alice. Her eyes were wide with terror and anger as she glared from me to Bella and back again. "Jasper, what did you DO?! What is WRONG with you?! How COULD you?!" she was looking around frantically, putting herself between me and Bella. I snarled. She looked at me and snarled back. "Don't you dare growl at me. Get out of here. Now. It's not an option for you." She snarled again, and crouched to spring. I didn't want to fight her-I knew that much-so I leapt from the window. The cool air helped to clear my head again, and I could finally feel remorse. In that moment Alice was in front of me, carrying Bella.

"I have to get her away from here-now. You really did it this time, Jasper-you bit her, and the venom is spreading. She's going to change, and I'm not going to let her wake up alone like I did. I'm taking her to Carlisle-there's nothing we can do for her but be there for her. If you get the nerve, go back there. She'll want an apology as soon as she wakes up." And Alice ran from me as Bella started screaming.

I followed, because I wasn't sure what else I could do. I owed my family an explanation, and apparently I would owe Bella one as well. I hadn't anticipated that. How angry was she going to be when she learned I meant to leave her dead? I sighed, and ran after Alice. They had moved to Oregon, because it was hard for them to move far away from Bella. As I approached the house, I could hear her. She was screaming in pain, and her agony washed over me like a sheet. I was sick with it. Carlisle was waiting on the porch.

"What were you thinking?" he asked bluntly.

"I wasn't. When I…slipped…at the house the other day, I couldn't get the taste out of my head. I wanted more, so I stayed. I went to her house, snuck in through her window, and took her. She was begging for death." He was blunt, so was I. He looked at me fiercely.

"She was grieving! How dare you! Bella is part of this family, Jasper. I can't tell you how disappointed I am. And Esme is beside herself!" He was scolding me like a child.

"And what about Alice? What has she said?" She was my wife, after all.

"I'll leave that to her. She's upstairs with Bella now, although there's nothing we can do for her." He spat at me. The repercussions were ringing in my ears as I followed him inside. Bella was in the bedroom closest to the end of the hallway. When I walked in, Alice shot me a warning glance, and fury radiated from her tiny frame. I stayed at the doorway.

Bella was writhing on the bed, her hands fisting the sheets as she cried out in pain. I quickly stole out of the room and went and sat downstairs. By this time, Emmett and Rosalie had made it back. Emmett was glaring at me, and it was bad when I made him mad. It was hard to do. He didn't even say anything to me as he walked up the stairs and into the bedroom that held Bella. Rosalie was feeling…smug? She smirked at me and walked to her own room. Great. The one vampire I had on my side was _Rosalie._

It went on like this for three days.

Nobody spoke to me, with the exception of Esme, because she couldn't help herself. She was mad at me too, but she was essentially loving first. Alice hadn't even left the room since she brought Bella back. Currently, it was about three in the morning and I was sitting on the couch with Carlisle. He was reading and I was staring at the wall when we heard Alice.

"It's time!" she said, barely above a whisper. Both myself and Carlisle took off for the bedroom, Emmett and Rosalie having already been upstairs. Esme was on Alice's other side. We all heard Bella's heart beat it's last beat, when at last it was still. Nobody said anything, or even breathed for that matter. Bella's eyes opened, and they were bright red.

She sat up quickly, because she couldn't quite handle her movements. She looked around, and I could feel awe and fear coming from her-a natural newborn reaction. She turned to Alice first. Her eyes widened, taking in Alice's appearance with her new eyes.

"What…" her hand flew to her mouth-a response to her new voice. She looked around again, and her eyes rested on me. I felt her emotions take a turn for the worst as she remembered her last night before this. Her eyes turned to slits and she was pure fury. I braced myself.

"Why?" she said, attempting to stand up at a slower pace. "Why did you do this to me?" she asked again, louder. Her voice was like Christmas bells.

"I…" But Alice cut me off.

"He was feeding from you, Bella. If I hadn't arrived when I did, he would have drained you dry." Way to stand up for me, Alice. If I thought Bella was mad before, I was wrong. She crouched, another natural response, and snarled at me. It took her back for a moment, hearing that sound from her, but it didn't break her concentration, which was focused on me.

"I'll never forgive you for this, Jasper Hale. I didn't want this"-she gestured to herself-"without Edward. And I don't have him, and you're all only here to pity me! And I have to live forever feeling this way?!" And faster than a strike, Bella lunged.


	3. Done with You

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed this story when it was just a nibblet. Your overwhelming response encouraged me to continue this story when I wasn't sure. Keep the reviews coming!**

Against my better instincts, I let her take me down. The rest of the family was there, so I knew that they wouldn't let her get _too_ far, and she deserved some retribution. I fell backwards at the force of her attack, and she landed on top of me-her fists never ceasing their angry fight. I didn't lift a finger.

"I _hate_ you! HATE YOU! I thought…I thought you were gone! You should have left, just like _he_ did. And everyone else." I could tell that she wanted to cry, but she couldn't anymore. Her punches hurt, but she was beyond the point of wanting to actually cause me physical harm. Or her instincts haven't kicked in yet, and she didn't know how. Finally Emmett came up and pulled her off me. She hissed at him, but allowed the movement. She stood fuming in the center of the room as I scrambled to my feet. Her eyes wheedled around until they landed on Alice again.

"And you-" she pointed at Alice, "you made me this way. Why didn't you let him kill me?" She asked, resigned. I had been around Bella for a while, and this wasn't Bella. This girl was dejected, and unwanted and unloved-at least that's what she was feeling. Alice looked beyond words.

"I didn't want you to die," she whispered. "I love you, Bella," she whispered again, this time quieter than the first. The misery that was pouring off of her very nearly brought me to my knees. She still wouldn't look at me.

"Then why did you leave me?" This question was directed to all of us, and the overwhelming emotion was shame. It was Carlisle, of course, who took center stage.

"Bella, Edward asked us to leave, and he is my son. That doesn't mean that we didn't love you, but Edward stated his case…very convincingly. We only wanted what was best for you." Bella was sitting now, and instead of feeling anger like I thought she would, she was curious. The shock was finally wearing off, and she wanted answers. Alice sat down beside her.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Edward came to us after your party. He said he was afraid that if we stayed here, with you, that we would be endangering your life further. He wanted to leave to keep you safe." Silence hung in the air as she digested what Carlisle had told her. "What did he say to you?"

"Apparently not what he said to you. I believe it was something along the lines of '_you're not good enough for me, Bella.'_ And '_I don't want you anymore.' _That about sums it up." Bitterness flowed around her like a cloud. What a way to be brought into this new life. I heard a collective gasp from my family as they took in her words.

"That stupid fool!" Alice was on her feet now, pacing circles around Bella, who was watching her every motion. "How _dare_ he! Oh, where is my phone…" she was patting her pockets when Bella's hand shot like a rocket and grabbed it.

"No. I don't want him…to know…" she was pleading. Alice nodded, and then immediately encircled Bella in her arms.

"Then he won't. I don't know where he is, but he won't be back for a while. I'm so sorry Bella, that he said those things to you. They're absolutely not true. I know he loves you, and we all do as well. Please…" Bella returned Alice's hug, but broke free a minute later. She turned to Carlisle.

"I'm thirsty, I think, and it's very bad. Will you take me…hunting, please? Just you." Carlisle nodded and motioned towards the door. Bella turned back to us. "And when I feel better, I want to talk to all of you, because I'm very mad about this. I'm not okay with being left behind like some old toy nobody wants to play with anymore. But I do love you all, and I want to work it out. But I don't want Edward to know I'm here." We all nodded as she went hunting with Carlisle. She turned once more to glare in my direction, and then left. Emmett, Rosalie and Esme filtered out behind them, but Alice stayed.

"We have to talk." She said staring me straight in the eye. I sat down on the couch and she joined me. "I'm not okay with this, Jasper. With what you did to Bella, and how you lied to me-which isn't easy to do. We've been together, for me, since I first opened my eyes. You were my future. But I don't think you are anymore."

"What are you saying, Alice? I don't understand." I did understand, actually, but I had to hear it from her lips. She didn't want me anymore, because I was a dismal monster.

"I'm saying I don't think I can be with you anymore, Jasper. I still love you, and I always will-but I can't stand it anymore. Sometimes I feel like your babysitter instead of your lover."

"Alice, I can change, I—" She held up a hand to stop me.

"No, you can't, Jasper, and it's not your fault. It's who you are. I've spent too long trying to change you, and it's not fair to either of us. But Bella's going to stay here, and I'm not going to leave her again. So if you can't handle just being my friend, then maybe you should go." Could I handle it? Alice was my world. My life. And she was done with me.

"What am I going to do?" I whispered as she took my hand.

"That's up to you. Of course I want you to stay, but you don't have to. But I think Bella needs us all, and that includes you. She needs to come to terms with what happened, and if you just leave it will make it harder for her. She's very upset."

"Obviously. She'll never forgive me though. How do you forgive someone for trying to kill you?" I smiled sadly.

"Oh, you should give Bella more credit than that. It's not going to happen overnight. But Bella is essentially loving and forgiving, remember that." It seemed a little bit cryptic, but Alice spoke in riddles most of the time anyway.

"I can't leave-this is the only real family that I've known. Maybe I can move into Edward's old room-he won't be coming back for a while. And…how do you think he's going to take it, anyway?" She scrunched up her face.

"Not well would be my guess. But I can't see it because he hasn't decided to come home yet. And I wouldn't move into his room-see if Carlisle would let you have his study. He can move his things into Edward's room." I furrowed my brow.

"Why?"

"Because I said so." Alright, then. And I was honest, at least, when I said I couldn't leave. If I left, I don't know what I'd do. I'd have nobody. At least here, if Alice didn't want me, I could have the rest of my family. I can't heal alone. I was very close to losing control of my emotions-I need to move.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I'm sorry I can't be who you want me to be." I stood up and walked out of the room. She didn't follow.

I perched myself on the roof and waited for Carlisle and Bella to come home. I knew I was going to have to face the verbal music from Bella sooner or later, and I knew it wasn't going to be pretty. All I could do is explain the feeling, now that she knew what it was like to feel the thirst. Despite what Alice said, I knew Bella would never forgive me. What I did was horrible-the worst thing possible. How do you come back from that? But I would try and redeem myself.

**Aww, sad Jasper!**


	4. Answers

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed so far! Please, if you read I really do like reviews. The more the merrier!**

**Also-if any of you are looking for a fabulous read, I recommend checking out Lillie Cullen's Lesson duet. A Lesson in Release is fabulous, and the sequel, A Lesson in Fate is even better! And she's wrapping it up, so it's almost complete! These stories have both made me cry on several occasions.**

**and now...**

I waited on the roof for at least 2 hours. While I waited, I thought. When Bella was human, I spent most of my time avoiding her. It wasn't because I didn't like her, but having a human that close to me all the time…well it was a bad idea. Obviously. At first, I only knew that she smelled really good and she was willing to keep our secret. But while we were in Phoenix, I learned more about her actual personality. She was very headstrong, and very self sacrificing. She didn't even know me all that well and she put my life before hers. I sighed. I had destroyed a perfectly innocent, giving person. Originally I was going to wait for her, see if she would talk to me, but I chickened out. When I heard them coming back to the house, I went inside. I conveniently decided that I would start moving my things out of Alice's room and into Carlisle's study. Except that I had to ask permission first. Damn.

"Carlisle?" I called, hoping he would come to me. Thankfully I was right. He looked at me questioningly. "Would it be too much of an inconvenience if I moved into your study and moved your things into…Edward's room?" I felt his surprise.

"Can I ask why?" he replied, placing a hand on my shoulder. Some of my grief must have leaked through. It was hard for me to control my emotions when they were so strong. He had a right to know. I saw Alice flash down the stairs, calling for Bella.

"Alice has decided to end our relationship. She doesn't want to leave Bella, and I don't want to leave the family." I stated bluntly, hoping he wouldn't ask for further details right away. He looked at me for a moment before pulling me into a quick embrace.

"I'm sorry, son. When you're ready to talk about it further, you know where to find me. In the meantime, feel free to use my study." He turned and walked away. I knew eventually I would be ready, but right now even I didn't know where to begin. I turned and walked towards my—Alice's room and saw that she and Bella were sitting on the edge of the stairs. Alice was braiding Bella's hair. They weren't talking, but I expected that would come soon enough. Bella was dealing with a lot right now.

As quietly as I could, I opened the door. There was a stack of boxes waiting for me, and I didn't hesitate. I started with my clothes, knowing they would be the easiest. I packed in silence for a while, listening to nothing. When I took the boxes containing my clothes to my new room, I saw Bella steal a quick glance in my direction. When I was out of site, I heard her ask, "Where is Jasper going?" Alice paused. I could feel her anxiety from here.

"Jasper is moving into his own room. We…are…no longer together. But I'm not leaving you, and he doesn't want to leave either, so he's taking Carlisle's study."

"Oh." I could feel a sharp burn of anger bubble up from her. "Honestly, I'm surprised he isn't running away now that all the fresh blood is gone. If he hurries, maybe he could try and kill my dad, too." I deserved that. She knew I could hear her, and in that moment I briefly considered taking flight. But Alice warned me that would do more harm than good, and even though we're separated, I knew better than to go against her suggestions.

"I'd be angry, too," was all Alice said. She resumed braiding Bella's hair, and though Bella was still radiating anger, she allowed it. I went back into Alice's room to finish packing. I had taken the easy things first. Now I had to face _Alice and Jasper._ I took one of our wedding pictures-our first one-and stared at it for eternity. We were happy, and laughing, and riding a horse (which had to be held by the reins to stop it from running.) I put it in the box. Next, I picked up a bottle of wine we got on our first trip to Rome. It was a rainy day (obviously) and we were walking down the street just to be outside. A man came towards us, smiling, which was unusual for us. I remember what he said, because it was so odd-"_maybe not today you will drink this, maybe not ever. But remember-fine wine grows better with age, as will your love."_ And he handed it to us and left. We thought it was crazy and cheesy, but we took it back with us, and put it on our dresser. He was right, we'd never drink it. And the wine was old-past it's prime. I don't think he expected us to outlive his wine. I put it in the box. I picked through assorted trinkets from our time together, and lastly came to our yearbook. The yearbook from my senior year and her junior year-last year. I flipped through to the last few pages where the student personalities were. Alice and I won "The Odd Couple" award. I compared that picture to our first wedding picture, and I could see the difference. And it hit me like a brick that Alice hadn't been happy with me for some time now. I put it in the box.

I put all my things in my new room, but didn't unpack anything but my clothes. I didn't want _our_ memory hanging around me all day when I was trying to be alone. I was sitting on my bed when I heard Bella start talking.

"I want to know what happened after my birthday party," she asked. I could tell that the rest of the family had joined her in the living room. Since I didn't feel ready to face the music yet, I moved to the top of the stairs and sat down. I wanted to hear what was being said, at least.

"Edward went crazy, to say the least," Emmett started. "he made up his mind as soon as dumb-ass upstairs took a bite out of you. Once you were safely home, he came and damn near ordered us to leave." He snorted.

"It wasn't quite like that, Bella," Carlisle chastised. "Edward's biggest concern was your safety. When Jasper attacked you, everything he'd feared for you flashed right in front of him. He was afraid if we stayed, you would be in danger."

"Fat lot of good it did, though, huh?" she said, acid tinting every word.

"Well…yes. But as my first son, I felt obliged to comply to his wishes. Please believe me when I say that we left _because_ we loved you. Edward stayed behind to settle things with you. I also believe that he just couldn't bring himself to go any sooner. So we came here, and he went elsewhere. As to where he is, I'm not sure."

"So Jasper came here with you guys, and then came _back_ to attack me after Edward left?" Oops. Alice knew. Right then, I knew she figured it out.

"No," Alice started, glaring furiously at the wall, "Jasper stayed behind. He said he wanted time to think." She didn't finish her thought. She jumped up and ran up the stairs where I was sitting.

"You knew. You knew right then and there that you were going to…to…" I nodded. No point in trying to cover my tracks now. "And I let you stay. I let you because I thought you were genuinely upset for Bella. This is my fault." I heard Bella before I saw her.

"No, Alice, it's not. It's his fault," she said, pointing at me. I didn't move. She rounded on me. "You. Upstairs. Now. I want to know every little thought that passed through your head those few days. Because for the life of me I can't figure it out! I had never done anything to you. I liked you. And you _owe_ it to me to explain." So much for staying out of the line of fire. But she was right, and I would tell her everything. I motioned her up to my room while the rest of the family watched with wide eyes.

"Dumbass," Emmett mumbled.

**A shortie, but necessary. Next time we'll get to the big explanation!**


	5. I'll Make You Listen

**Hey guys! Thanks for all of you who reviewed! Especially you guys who review every chapter of every story I put up-I recognize some of your names now! This chappy is a short one, but necissary. Soon enough we'll get to the action!**

**And for those of you who love me :P I've just started another story, titled Control, which is going to have some dark and naughty Jasper in it. I have a feeling it's going to be a lengthy story, too!**

_Shit._ Bella was staring at me, her eyes full of fury, as we took opposite ends of the desk in Carlisle's office. "Well?" she said as she tapped her foot.

"I might as well start from the beginning-your birthday party. We all knew how good you smelled-that was no surprise. And I've smelled your spilt blood before, in Phoenix. But I was working so hard trying to pull James away, and then Emmett made me leave the room, so I didn't get a chance to even look in your direction. But believe me, it was hard. But I was on guard then. At your party, it was just an accident. I was too close, and I wasn't focused. And when it hit me, I knew I couldn't stop, so I just…let instinct take over." She was still scowling at me, but she had unwound her limbs a little and was paying attention.

"Okay, I get that much. It was natural. And I forgave you for that-I told Alice to tell you that I wasn't mad at you. But why did you come back?"

"When they pulled me off of you, I was pissed. Don't take this the wrong way, but you were delicious." She growled. "Sorry. But I had been denied human blood for so long that it ignited this part of me I try very hard to keep away."

"What does that mean?" she spit, back to her angry state.

"Bella, my life wasn't like the rest of the Cullens. I fed from humans for a long time. Longer than Edward. I was rewarded with blood. So when I met Alice and saw how we were to live, it was a big shock. That's why I have such control issues-I wasn't used to being denied. But that's a story for another time. I apologize for getting side-tracked."

"Alright. So overcome with bloodlust, angry about not finishing me off. Why didn't you snap out of it? Edward was able to, and my blood is stronger to him then it is to you." I started shaking my head before she was even finished.

"Don't be so sure about that. Edward…has more finesse than I do. Your blood brought me so much _relief_ that when it was taken away from me all I could focus on was getting more. The idea didn't surface until I found out the family was leaving, which was why Alice didn't see it. And Edward was so focused on you that he wasn't paying attention to my thoughts-though I was very careful to stay away from him."

"But didn't you think about _me_ at all? You knew me, Jasper, and you still chose to kill me." I sighed. I couldn't think of what to say, because she was absolutely right.

"I know. I know! I just…wanted it so bad, Bella! I hate that it was you, because I don't have anything against you!" She was taking a breath to yell at me again when I thought of something.

"Come on. Come with me-I'll try and show you what I mean." She was looking at me like I was crazy, but she followed. I guess she was curious enough to know my reasoning. I was banking on the fact that she hadn't been around humans since she'd been turned to prove my point. We flew down the stairs and jumped into my car before anyone could say anything. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Carlisle open the door to come after us, but Alice's restraining hand kept him inside. Good.

I drove straight into the city of Forks. It was noon, so the kids at school should be in the cafeteria. I looked over at Bella, who was looking slightly worried as the scent of the humans filled the car. I pulled up next to the school and looked at the students walking around outside of the cafeteria building-I saw exactly who I was looking for. I rolled down the window and pointed to Angela Weber. Bella's eyes grew wide as she took in the full blast of her blood-scented air. I watched her body tense to spring, and she reached for the door handle. She'd lost all thought-I could see it in her eyes. I rolled up the window and sped away.

"You knew her, correct?" I asked. She nodded, looking sick. "She was your friend." She nodded again. "And you wanted nothing more than to drain her dry just then, didn't you?" She nodded a third time and let out a little sniff. "Do you understand where I'm coming from, now? Do you see? Just because I liked you doesn't mean that I wouldn't kill you in an instant. Imagine tasting Angela's blood. You wouldn't have stopped."

"Okay." That was all she said as we drove home. Once I had parked the car, she got out and walked inside, still silent. I followed, but when I got inside I found that she had gone straight to her room. I stood by Carlisle, who was looking at me questioningly.

"I drove her to the school and let her see her friends." Carlisle's curiosity quickly turned to reproach.

"Jasper! You knew that was dangerous. Why?" Esme, Alice, Rosalie and Emmett had come in to hear my explanation. I'm guessing Bella told them she wanted to be alone.

"I couldn't make her understand why I couldn't stop. Then I remembered that she hasn't been near a human since her change. I wanted to make her see that just because she was my friend, she was also human. And being human means being in danger. She felt true bloodlust for the first time today, and now she knows."

"I think you hurt her feelings, Jasper. She won't talk to me." Alice said from the corner of the room.

"Alice, I had to make a point. Otherwise I don't think she would have ever understood what I was truly feeling. Even if she never forgives me for what happened, at least now she understands." She just shook her head and went back upstairs. I heard her knock on Bella's door, and thankfully she opened it.

I went to sit on the couch where Emmett joined me, watching TV-or rather staring at the screen when a newsflash caught my attention.

_Teenage girl missing-believed dead._

"_Isabella Swan, daughter of Police Chief Charlie Swan, has been missing for two weeks now, with no leads. She is not believed to be a runaway. When a forensics team did a sweep of her room, there were traces of blood on her bed and on the carpet. Police suspect foul play."_

Shit. "Alice!" Carlisle called, but her and Bella appeared. He pointed to the TV screen, where the camera was focused on Charlie's house. Bella gasped, but Alice looked frustrated.

"I swear I cleaned up!" she said, turning to put her arms around Bella, who was sobbing tearlessly at the site of her weeping father.

"Apparently Charlie called in a forensics team from Seattle to comb her room for evidence. They didn't find any prints, but they did find traces of Bella's blood. We should fabricate an animal attack somewhere in the woods." He turned to Emmett, who nodded. "Make it look two weeks old. Bella, honey, I'm sorry you had to see that. We should have taken care of it better."

"Not your fault. Emmett, the shirt I was wearing…that night…is upstairs in a plastic bag. I hadn't gotten around to throwing it away yet. That will work, right?" she asked Carlisle.

"Absolutely. Thank you." Just as he turned to pat her on the shoulder, his cell phone rang.

"I have one guess about who that is. Lie." Alice said and before she could object, she had Bella by the arm and was pulling her upstairs. Carlisle flipped the phone open and put it to his ear.

"Edward! What a pleasant surprise."


	6. Terrible Lie

**I want to clear something up. I had a couple questions on why it took weeks for Bella to see any news reports on herself. I should have mentioned that Bella knew she had been considered 'missing' but she didn't know they thought she was dead. I apologize for the confusion.**

I watched Carlisle's expression turned strained as he tried to put up a front with Edward. Granted, Carlisle has been around for a long while, so he's quite skilled at lying, but lying to strangers was different than lying to your son. I could hear Bella struggling upstairs trying to figure out what was going on while Alice tried to keep her calm.

"How are you doing, son?" Carlisle asked. I could hear Edward on the other end.

"_What's happened to Bella? I heard the news-it's all over the country. Do you know anything? Oh, Carlisle…"_ Edwards voice pained me to no end. And what could we tell him? "Yes, we know what's happened to her-Jasper tried to eat her but now she's a vampire" or "We have no idea what happened to her and now she's probably dead?" Both of those options would send Edward over the edge. I could feel Carlisle's anguish-I'm surprised everybody couldn't. Apparently Alice had calmed Bella down enough to leave the room, because she was standing at the edge of the stairs with a frantic look on her face, shaking her head. She looked at me.

"If he tells him she's dead, he will snap. I see him going to the Volturi and asking to die." Her voice was barely above a whisper, but both Carlisle and I heard it. We waited a moment, and it appeared that Edward didn't.

"We're not supposed to be here. We were supposed to leave. He'll be furious if he knows we're back." I murmured to Alice-I had moved closer and was whispering in her ear. She looked at me for a short moment and then looked at Carlisle.

"Give me the phone." He complied, looking worried. But he always trusted Alice, and I could feel her resolve as she tried to put up a farce.

"Edward. You're going to be very mad at me," she said in a sing-song voice. She was trying to play his little sister.

"_Alice! What's going on?"_

"Bella called me a few weeks ago. I know I shouldn't have, but I snuck a note into one of her books with my phone number on it. It was one she never read, so I never expected her to find it. But I couldn't just leave her with nothing!"

"_Damnit, Alice!"_ She cut him off before he could continue.

"Stop! Anyway, she called me a few weeks ago. She said that she didn't care if you didn't love her anymore, she wanted to know if we did. And of course I told her yes. Then she said she wanted to move out of Charlie's house, but he wouldn't let her. So she ran away, which was totally not something Bella would do. She said it was better if Charlie just thought she was dead, because she would never be his little girl anymore. So naturally I came and got her, and the gist of it is she's staying here with us." The last part came out as sort of a breathless rush, like she didn't want Edward to hear what she was saying. And all in all, it was a terrible lie. Bella would never have done that to Charlie. But Alice was working off of absolutely zero time, and that was the best she could come up with. Actually, I was surprised at her lack of wit. I looked towards Carlisle, who was feeling equally as puzzled.

It was a few minutes before he answered. _"Bella is staying with you in Alaska?"_ Oops. I saw Alice cringe.

"Well…we may or may not have come back to Forks." More silence.

"_You…came…back…to Forks?"_

"Mmm hmm." Alice responded, again trying to play the innocent card.

"_I promised her, Alice! I told her we'd stay away! What were you thinking? What were you ALL thinking? And now I'm some sort of monster-even more so! Because you're with her and I'm not. You knew why I was doing it! You knew I loved her!" _And then the phone went dead.

"Crap! Crap, crap, crap!" Alice said, spinning around the room like some sort of tiny tornado. "What was I thinking?! I wasn't! I just…my mouth just…oh, hell!" She said, clearly frustrated with herself.

"I believe the phrase you're looking for is verbal diarrhea." I hadn't even noticed Bella creeping to the head of the stairs. Alice looked at her in a pained fashion and then continued her frantic pacing. "So what does this mean?" she said, clearly asking about the outcome of Alice's terrible lie.

"Well, he's coming back here, that much is for sure. But now, thanks to my 'verbal diarrhea,'" she said, looking disgustingly at Bella for her turn of phrase, "he's coming back thinking to find a happy, human Bella who ran away from home."

"Which, is, decidedly not the case." Bella responded, sending a quick glare in my direction.

"Exactly. And now I'm all frazzled and I can't get all my thoughts together and he'll be here in no time because he wasn't that far in the first place!" At this news Bella sat down on the top step.

"Where was he?" Carlisle asked.

"Quebec. He just likes to run through Canada. But it won't take him long at all to get here-the punk is fast." Esme, Rosalie and Emmett joined us, having made it back from their little excursion to fix mess number one. Noting the atmosphere, it was Emmett who spoke up first.

"What's going on?" he asked, looking around for danger.

"Edward is coming home." I stated. That was enough to get the room buzzing with emotions again.

"And what of Bella?" Esme asked, flitting up the stairs to sit next to her.

"He saw the news, so naturally he called. Alice talked to him, and made the mistake of telling him that Bella had ran away from home. He thinks she's staying with us."

"Well, she is!" Emmett said, clearly missing the point.

I sighed. "Yes, but he thinks that _human_ Bella is staying here" I saw his eyes widen.

"Ah, crap."

"Exactly."

"So what do we do?" Esme asked.

"Well, we can't take Bella away. She can't be near humans. And we don't have time to run her north to Denali. But Bella isn't ready to face him, and he'll try and hurt Jasper, so I…I really don't know." Carlisle was grim. At his words, the entire family started to feel one thing-fear. I looked at Bella, who was cringing into Esme's shirt.

"This is all your fault, you know," Rosalie said, glaring in my direction.

"I know." I said. I wasn't going to fight it. It _was_ my fault. But I wasn't afraid of Edward-we were very closely matched. If it came to a fight, I don't think I would lose.

"Here's what I think." Bella stood up, trying to put on a brave face. I knew otherwise. "Alice and Carlisle can be outside waiting for him. Rose, Em and me can go…outside. To the back yard. Jasper can go and wait by the river because he's going to want to fight." I nodded, acknowledging this fact. "But with Emmett out here, he'll be able to be on Edward's heels, and hopefully stop him before any major damage is inflicted. I'll bet that's what he does first. And when he's done, he can come and talk to me."

"Bella, are you sure you're ready for that?" Carlisle asked, concern showing on his face for his newest daughter.

"I don't have a choice. I have to be ready. But I can do it." She nodded as if affirming it to herself.

"It sounds like a good plan to me," Carlisle said. The rest of the room nodded in agreement.

"Jasper? Can you handle this?" Esme asked me. No matter how angry she was at me, she still cared.

"Yes. I'll take what I deserve." I said, and I knew I would. I wouldn't fight him, not unless it was to save my life. He was going to be angry, and I was going to take the punishment, like I had with Bella. I saw her frown out of the corner of my eye, but she didn't say anything.

Alice's head whipped to the door. "I suggest we get into position now. Edward will be here in 5 minutes." She turned to Bella. "What are you going to say to him?"

"I don't know."

**Sorry! I had to bring him back, because...I just did. So soon we'll know what Bella's got to say! I also am sorry it's taking me so long to post-I'm usually uber fast. But I'm planning my spring break trip (early, I know)-I'm going to...Seattle! (and the surrounding areas, *wink wink*)**


	7. The Blame Game

**I love your reviews!**

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

I sat by the river and waited, because that's all I could do. But I could hear everything going on at the house. I could hear Bella pacing between Emmett and Rosalie (who, strangely, has become rather fond of Bella-she just won't say anything) and Carlisle and Alice whispering out front. For the death of me I couldn't figure out why they bothered to whisper! I could tell Esme was lurking around as well, unsure as to where she wanted to be. And I could hear footsteps running in the direction of the house from the forest. Damn.

Edward rushed forward, meeting Alice and Carlisle out front. _"Where is she?"_ he asked.

"_Okay, Edward. Here's the thing. I _may_ have confused the explanation I gave you earlier."_ I snorted. Confused would be the understatement of the century.

"_What do you mean, confused? And Alice, why are you singing _Thriller_ in your head? What's going on? Why are you both blocking me?" _And Edward was going to overreact in three…two….one…

"_Son. Why don't we take a little walk."_ Ah, Carlisle, he's not going to fall for that!

"_I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on._" Told you so. Alice let out a frustrated sigh. I wondered if she was going to tell him verbally, or just let him see the whole thing. Neither option was going to bode well on my part. I didn't hear anything for a moment, so I guessed that Alice was letting him watch. I cringed. _"You're not serious."_

"_I'm afraid so. I want you to keep in mind that it is his nature to do so, and that he has struggled much harder with this than any of us. I also want you to remember where he was taught."_ I wanted to hug Carlisle for standing up for me, even though I knew he didn't want to. I also knew that it wasn't going to work. I could feel Edward's anger and his anguish-he couldn't decide which way to turn. Run to Bella or attack me?

"_Where is he."_ It wasn't a question. He made his choice-just like Bella said. I hope Emmett is ready to run.

"_Down by the river, waiting for you. Edward, please. You need to work through this first."_

"_I don't want to work through this. And why is it, Alice, that you're not covered in his scent? You hate him for it, don't you?"_ Damn you, Edward! She has nothing to do with this. He's only bringing her into it because he needs to project his anger onto someone.

"_I left him, Edward. But not because I hate him."_ I didn't feel the conviction in her words.

Enough.

"I'm out here, Edward! Leave Alice out of this. She's done nothing." I heard him take off, and within seconds he was there. And he was pissed. He crouched forward and lunged before I had a chance to blink. I let him. The first blow caught me right in the cheek, and I could hear the snap. It's a good thing I can't have broken bones.

"You're going to wish I could break your bones by the time I'm through with you," he growled. He struck again, this time on the other side. He was aiming to hurt, not to kill. "Yet," he growled again. I heard Emmett trailing him and grabbing him by the shoulders to pull him off.

"Enough with the hitting, bro. Bella kicked his ass pretty good when she woke up. And he's not going to fight back, because he knows he deserves it. All you're gonna accomplish is hurting Esme's feelings." Edward swung again, but stood up to face Emmett.

"I'm not through with you," he hissed.

"I don't expect you to be." I replied. What else could I say? If I was in his position, I would do the same thing.

"Let's go back to the house. Bella is waiting to talk to you." Emmett said, pulling him along. I trailed, taking another way through the front of the house. I crept up to my room and perched by the window. I know this was supposed to be a private moment, but I wanted to hear what she had to say to him. She was so headstrong-this should be good. I could hear the rustle of feet as the rest of the family found places to listen nonchalantly as well. There was a reason there were no secrets in this house.

"_Bella…" _Edward breathed. I could feel his adoration for her. Strangely, I didn't feel the same from her. The primary emotion I got from her was hurt.

"_Hi."_ She replied. _That_ was the best she could do?!

"_Bella, I'm so sorry this happened to you. I wish with my entire being that I could have stopped this from happening."_ I heard her take a deep breath.

"_That's the thing, Edward. You could have stopped it."_ What?

"_I don't understand. What do you mean, love?"_ Yes, please, fill us in because I was way past confused. How could he have stopped it?

"_If you wouldn't have left me, Jasper wouldn't have stayed to harm me. You got scared, and you ran away. You _left_ me alone-it was to be expected that something like this would happen."_

"_Bella, you know I only left you to keep you safe. I had no idea that my _brother_ had those thoughts in his head. I was too upset over the thought of leaving you to pay attention to him."_ He pleaded, moving closer to her. She stepped back.

"_Do you see what's wrong with that sentence? If you were so upset over leaving me, why did you leave in the first place?! Wasn't my love good enough to keep you here. Wasn't _I_ good enough?"_ Her reaction surprised me so much that I went to join Carlisle and Esme downstairs. They were listening at the back door. I didn't want to hear it alone anymore-her pain was too great, and coupled with Edward's grief it was getting hard to stand.

"_My brother attacked you in your bed and you think it's my fault?"_ he was asking, but it was very accusatory. Bella's eyes were slits.

"_Yes. You know, Jasper's always had problems with control. Now, I kind of hate the fact that he lost control with me, but it happened. It's his nature. And yes, I'm still mad at him. But you know what he _didn't_ do? He didn't leave. He stayed here while I was changing. He let me beat him up when I woke up. He let me yell at him afterwards. Hell-he even showed me what it was like to want something so bad you could claw your eyes out. But when something bad happened to me in front of you, you ran away."_ I wanted to point at Edward and say "See? I told you so!" but that wouldn't be very respectful of me. I couldn't deny the fact that I was pleased with this outcome-at least knowing that I got through to Bella. How she could ever look at me again after what I'd done, I'll never know. But I'm glad she can. And now, more than anything, I wanted to know her-because evidently there was so much more to her than what she gave off.

"_But I love you, Bella…" _Was all Edward could say. Well, that's not going to do a lot of good, now, is it?

"_Well, you sure as hell have a funny way of showing it. I'd appreciate it if you would leave me alone for now. I can't stand to look at you."_ I smiled. I couldn't help myself! It was so empowering to watch her stand up for herself like that-to finally put herself first just this once. Hell-I was proud of her. Edward marched in the house and snarled at me.

"Don't you dare look so smug at me. This is your fault. I'll never forgive you for this." I looked him square in the eye.

"That's fine. Because it's not your forgiveness I'm after." I walked outside, intent on going back to the river for a while, when Bella stopped in front of me.

"Don't let it go to your head. You've got a long way to go." She turned away, but she looked back and smirked. And for the first time in weeks, I wasn't at the bottom of Bella's favorite person list.

**Good for Bella, huh? And I just had to throw a little tribute to MJ in there-even though I wasn't his greatest fan ever (far from it) a music icon he was.**


	8. Breaking Walls

**Disclaimer: Does not belong to me! Go Stephenie Meyer!**

**Thanks for the reviews, guys, keep them coming!**

**For those of you who were fans of One More Taste: It's been nominated for an Indie award for best non-Edward/Bella story line! Voting starts tomorrow, so if you'd like to vote, go** **www dot theindietwificawards dot com like I said, starting tomorrow, 7/8. A big, excited hug to those who do! The link is also on my profile.**

"I'm going into town for a bit," I told Carlisle on my way to the garage. "Do you need anything from town?"

"I don't think so. May I ask what you're after?" he asked inquiringly at me before I got into the car.

"I'm going to get something for Bella. A present of sorts." I wasn't going to tell Carlisle exactly _what_ and _where_ I was going to get her present, however. But I can't think about that right now. He smiled at me, waiting for me to continue. "If you don't mind, I'm not going to tell you. I don't want to, ah, be found out." Damn Edward and his gift. Even though Bella was shunning him, he had decided to stay. His emotions varied minute by minute, but mostly he was remorseful. I'm sure he was thinking of ways to redeem himself. Well, it's my turn first.

"I understand. I'm looking forward to this," he grinned. Bella had softened a bit towards me, but she was still…unreceptive. She didn't want another apology, so I had a better idea. As I drove towards town, I found I was actually excited about this. I knew that Bella didn't like presents that cost money, so I thought better of getting her something like that.

I pulled up to Charlie's house, right in my estimate that he was back to work. Bella's demise was so quick, and our action so responsive, that she didn't get to take anything with her. I was going to bring some things to her. Nothing noticeable, that wouldn't be wise. But perhaps a book? Some pictures? I crawled through her window-Bella's scent was very faint. Charlie had everything just like it was, even adding new sheets and a quilt. I felt a sharp stab a grief for Charlie. I let my hands touch the clothes in her closet, but didn't take any. Her small book collection was full of ragged books with cornered pages-I was surprised by her collection. Classics, mostly. I grabbed two and carefully rearranged to where it looked untouched.

I let myself walk through her house, touching on things every now and then-a picture of Bella and Charlie, a skillet full of burnt hash browns in the kitchen. Throughout my long life, I had done a lot of things I regret. But seeing this house, touched by Bella but changed by her loss, I knew that taking her life had been the worst. I didn't want to stay here anymore. I was the worst kind of creature for having done this. I ran back up to Bella's room, grabbed the things I had chosen, and climbed out the window.

I had hoped that Edward would be gone when I got back, but no such luck. He was on the front porch, brooding. He scowled at me when I walked up.

"Where were you?" he snapped, and I thought we were going to have a fight again. But he didn't move.

"I don't believe it's any of your business," I snarled back, moving past him quickly on my way into the house. I tried to move straight to Bella's room, but he was on my heels. "Carlisle!" I called, with hopes that he would fend him off. He was there in an instant.

"Edward, leave Jasper alone. I don't like to chastise you like a child, so please don't make me. Go and see if Esme needs help-she's refurbishing the house across the river." Edward looked as if he would protest, but Carlisle raised a hand to him. "Go. For me, please." Edward gave me another piercing look, but followed Carlisle's directions. "I'll give you two a moment." He smiled and patted me on the shoulder before turning to leave. I was pleased to see that he was feeling a little less animosity towards me. It was good to know he still cared.

I knocked on Bella's door, sure that she must have heard the commotion just then. "Come in." she said curtly. I walked in, carrying the box in front of me. "What's that?"

"I brought you something." I replied, handing it to her. She shook her head.

"Jasper, if you think you can just buy me off, you must not know _anything_ about me. I don't want it."

"I didn't spend any money. Trust me-I think you'll like it. And I'm not trying to buy you off. Just open it." I tried again to hand it to her, and this time she took it, her curiosity peaked. She opened it and gasped. She pulled out the books first-I brought her Jane Austen anthology and _Dracula_. The last choice was simply for humor. She brought them to her face, inhaling deeply. It may have been the first time she smelled what was left of her human scent. When she read the titles, she smiled and then sniggered. The next item was an old journal that I found at the bottom of her closet-one among many. She flipped through the pages, smiling every now and then. I stayed still, letting her have her moment. The last items were pictures that she had tucked away in her drawer. The first one was of her and Charlie hugging awkwardly at a beach-must have been in California. I believe that she mentioned spending summers there before she moved here. The other one was of her and Renee, doing some sort of kick-boxing exercise, laughing hysterically.

"How did you get these?" she whispered, clutching the pictures to her chest.

"I went to Charlie's house while he was at work. I thought you would like some things that belong to you." She motioned for me to sit next to her. In a move that surprised even me, she threw her arms around me and pulled me tight.

"Thank you…" she mumbled into my chest. After a moment, I brought my arms and placed them around her waist. She was feeling sad, but there as an undertone of joy as well. I soaked it up, not having felt that particular emotion in a while. I stroked the hair that was lying across her back, finding it incredibly soft. She pulled away, but didn't move her hands. "Why did you do it?"

I looked into her eyes. "Bella. I have done some deplorable things in my life, but what I did to you? I could never have done anything worse. I know that I can't make up for that, but I want you to see that I truly am sorry. I want you to know that I will do anything for you, if it will make you see that. I want to know you." I could feel her surprise, but thankfully no anger. She scrutinized me for a moment before speaking.

"Will you tell me about yourself? I don't think I understand what you mean when you say you've done 'deplorable things.'" I sighed.

"Are you sure you want to know?" She nodded.

"I was a soldier before I was turned. I was on patrol one night when a vampire named Maria and her companions came across me, alone. Evidently they liked what they saw, and they turned me. I remember them saying that they wanted soldiers, and here I was. When I woke up, I learned what my job was going to be." I paused to look at her.

"They gave you a job?"

"Yes. You see, in the south the vampires fought for territory. Their main method of weaponry just happened to be newborn vampires. I was to make sure they didn't kill each other too quickly." Her eyes grew wide, and I smiled sadly at her realization. She was afraid. "I was good at my job, naturally. That was when I discovered my gift. But it was my reward that I looked forward to."

"What do you mean, reward?" I smiled again.

"When I did well, I was allowed to feed more. I grew accustomed to instant gratification. And I didn't eat what we eat now, if you know what I mean. I hated the feeling of feeding, however-the emotions of the person I was killing. That was what encouraged me to leave. I was still hunting people when Alice found me."

"That's why your control is so bad." She stated, not asking.

"Yes. I never had to have any control before. After so many years of having what I wanted when I wanted it, you can imagine how hard it was. How hard it still is."

"I'm sorry that happened to you, Jasper." I was taken aback by this. She was apologizing to me?

"I can't stand it if you apologize to me." I told her. The thought of it made me sick. Her overwhelming compassion choked me. "How can you even stand to look at me?" I asked.

"Because. I know what you did was wrong. Obviously I'm pissed. But…I didn't know what your life was like. And I know you're sorry. I can see that. Especially after what you did for me today. You've explained it to me. Hell-you've even showed me. And then you bothered to bring me some of my favorite things. I'm mad, Jasper, but I'm not a monster. I'm capable of forgiveness. And apparently you haven't been shown enough." And she took me into her arms again. I will never know how it ended with her comforting me, I just know that for those few minutes when I was in her arms, I felt…right. I wasn't hiding anything with her. Somehow, this girl-_This girl!_ Has gotten me to let down a wall that I've had up for a hundred years. I clutched at her clothes, feeling like a child as I sobbed tearlessly into her shoulder.

**Good? I liked it.**


	9. Candy and Flowers

"Why, Bella?" I had to ask. We were still holding our embrace, though I began detangling myself as I asked. I had to understand how this woman could forgive me for this. In my mind, when you murdered someone, that was a pretty unforgivable offense. She looked at me for a long moment before answering.

"When I look at you, I see so many things-like a puzzle. But you don't really fit together. You seem broken, and I'm guessing that's because you had one hell of a life. I also see the fact that you've lived with this family for a good chunk of that life, and you still don't feel comfortable in your own skin." My eyes widened in surprise. I thought I put up a pretty good front, myself. "I know that because that's how I've felt my entire life. Why _do_ you feel that way, Jasper?"

She deserved, if anything, for me to be completely honest with her. I knew that no matter what I said, I could trust her to keep it to herself as well. "Because they don't trust me. From the moment I walked into this life with Alice, they never trusted me. I was always the one they had to watch, the one that had to be kept close. They acted like at any second I was going to grab the nearest human and eat them." I scowled. I hated feeling that, but that's what I felt all the time. "Every second, I could feel it from them. I knew, even if they wouldn't say."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but you kind of did. Grab the nearest human, that is." She was trying to act serious, but she wasn't doing very well.

"Okay, I know that. But that doesn't excuse the fact that they watched me from the moment I walked in the house. Not Alice, just me. And I never once said anything when one of them got a surge of bloodlust, because I thought of them as family. But I doubt very much that they see me that way. I just hate feeling like the weakest link."

"So you feel like you're not part of the family?" she asked, concern knitting her brow. She genuinely felt worried for me, and it pinched my emotions in a strange way.

"I'm _not_ part of the family. Carlisle made everyone except Alice, and she just naturally fits in. I don't. I know it sounds childish, but I don't fit in anywhere, even in my old life." I hated this complaining, but she asked, and now it was like I was a fountain, and this information was just exploding from me.

"So, pretty much, you feel like you have no control over your life. That you've been watched and told what to do since you were created." I nodded.

"I feel that way too." She was just desolate right now.

"But I thought you were more of a parent than your mother? That you had to take care of _her_?"

"I did, but that doesn't mean she didn't watch me all the time. In fact, she was much too observant for her own good. Why do you think I was so reluctant for her to come up here for anything? To meet you all? I was afraid she'd see right through you. I always had to be the grown up. I was never allowed to just…be myself. And with Charlie? He's was the quintessential father. Now, I'm the crazed newborn vampire that everybody has to watch, just in case I decide to take off and eat someone."

"So you're the new me, so to speak." I replied, a little smug. Not that it made my family like me anymore, quite the opposite.

"Looks like it. Jasper, have you ever thought of leaving? I mean, going out and doing your own thing for a while?"

"Every damn day since Alice left me. But she told me that I owed you the chance to talk to me, or beat me up, or both. And of course I knew that, I wouldn't abandon you after what I'd done."

"But what about now? I've said my peace with you, you'd be free to leave if you wanted. What's keeping you here?" She inquired. Hmm.

"You, I suppose. I don't feel like it's right of me to leave, considering I'm your…creator, so to speak." I couldn't just leave her, even though she was always more apart of the family than I was. It just didn't seem…gentlemanly. I wanted to roll my eyes at myself.

"What if…" she hesitated. Guilt, worry, fear…what could make her feel like that?

"What if what, Bella?" I could almost see where this was going, but I had to be wrong. There was just no way.

She took in a deep, unnecessary breath and looked me straight in the eye. "What if I went with you?" I hate it when I'm right sometimes. First, I couldn't believe that she would want to be around me, let alone for that period of time, after what had happened between us. And then, would the family even allow it?

"How could you even want to do that, after what I did?" I was appalled. "You were ready to rip my head of a few weeks ago."

"Well, yeah, but I told you earlier-I see your point. And I'm still mad, you'll have some serious making up to me to do. I expect candy and flowers by the bucketful." She winked, and I couldn't believe that she was trying to use humor to get out of this.

"You don't like presents like that. Explain, please." I was in the military, it takes quite a bit more than that to distract me.

"Fine. You need to get out of here to find your own way. I need to find _my_ own way as well. But I can't be alone, obviously. You know how to handle newborn vampires. It makes sense, really." Logical.

"But can you say that you're comfortable with me, alone, for an undistinguished amount of time? Can you be okay with the two of us being together? Because I've lived with people being uncomfortable around me my entire life, and if I leave, I'm not about to do it again." I had to be sure, because I wasn't going to take this lightly. I'd thought about leaving on more than one occasion, since I've never been out on my own. The idea, presented to me now when I had very few ties, was intoxicating.

"Yes. I'm sick of being angry, it's just not in my nature. Forgiveness is divine, remember? I want to go out and do this my way. And if I decide that this family is right for me, then I'll come back." Now I was confused again.

"Bella, it wasn't too long ago when you would have given anything to be a permanent part of this family. What's changed now that you're immortal?" I remembered all too well the fights she and Edward would have over her mortality.

She looked down at her feet. "I wanted to be a permanent part of this family with _Edward._ And now, I don't think that's right. I don't want to burden them with my presence if I'm not one hundred percent sure this is where I want to be. Don't get me wrong! I love every single one of them with everything I've got. But I feel that this is something I have to do, or I won't be truly happy." And I knew I had to take her with me.

"Okay." I sighed. "Okay. Let's do this. We'll have to go somewhere remote for a while, because I'm not up to chasing you away from the humans every day. I'll do my best to help you, but I'm not going to watch your every move. That would defeat the whole point of this little…excursion."

"I hear Alaska is nice this time of year," Alice chimed in from the door. I was so engrossed in our discussion that I didn't even feel her come up. She was sad, for the most part, and a little bit angry. "Bella, I'm not happy about this. Not one bit." She was trying to play the guilty big sister on her. I almost wanted to laugh, if it wasn't my former wife feeling these things about me.

"I didn't think you would be, Alice. But that's not the point. I _have_ to do this, and you'll agree that it's not safe for me to do it alone. And I _will not_ have one of you going off with me, disrupting your life while I'm out soul searching." Alice was already shaking her head.

"It wouldn't be a disruption."

"Yes, it would. I'm not taking you away from the life you have here. Jasper already agreed to it, which I'm sure you saw. And you didn't see anything dangerous coming from it, or you would be more than angry right now." She stared at Alice smugly, like she had the upper hand. Alice scowled.

"Bella, he killed you." I knew, right then, that she didn't have an ounce of love for me left. I also knew that if Bella changed her mind, I was still going to go.

"I realize that, thank you. But we've been over this, and I'm not going to let that rule my life. Somebody killed each and every one of us, and just because my situation sucked the big one doesn't mean I'm going to dwell on it forever. I'm doing this." Her words were final, and I could feel the succession flowing from Alice as she gave up.

"Fine. But I'm not telling the rest of them. And when you come back, I get to say a big, fat I told you so." Alice turned to dance out of the room.

"I'll hold you to that. Jasper, why don't you start packing what you want to take, and I'll go and break the news to the rest of the family." As if I would let her do it alone.

"No dice. I'm going with you-it's only fair. I'm not going to take anything, anyway." I didn't want anything, come to think of it, I wanted to start fresh.

"Me either." She smiled as she flew down the stairs and called everyone into the room. Edward was focusing on me, trying to pick out what we were going to say. _I'm not telling…_

"I'm leaving." Way to be blunt, Bella. Gasps came from around the room, and Edward sank into a chair. "And Jasper's coming with me." They stared at us like we had just asked to run for President and Vice-President of the United States.

"Excuse me?" Edward roared, glaring solely at me.

"_I said,_ that Jasper and I are leaving," Bella said, glaring right back at him. I could get used to this!

"Why, Bella?" Esme asked, looking like she had cancer of the puppy.

"It's not because I don't love you all, because I do! But I need to do this on my own for a bit. Jasper has agreed to come with me to make sure I don't accidentally eat any townsfolk, and because he feels like he should explore other avenues."

"Jasper, is this true?" Carlisle asked, feeling quite bemused at the turn of cards.

"Yes. Now that I am…no longer tied down, I feel it's necessary to branch apart for a while. But, as Bella has pointed out, it's not because I don't care for you. I love you all, deeply. But this is the best for me, right now. Of course we'll stay in touch, and you'll all be more than welcome to visit."

"And Bella is okay with this." Edward said, shaking his head.

"Yes, I am okay with this. In fact, I'm the one who asked him to go. He'll keep me safe without smothering me. And if I find that this is the place I should be, I'll come back." Carlisle nodded, coming forward to embrace Bella. Soon she was surrounded by family as they wished her good luck-they sensed that there was no use arguing with her-it had never done any good in the first place. Edward stayed in the chair, head in his hands. He was desperate. Desperate for her to stay was my best guess. His head rose marginally as he turned to glare at me.

"I'm surprised with the outcome, but I'm glad you will have someone with you. We love you-both. Call us soon." Bella nodded and turned towards the door, before catching Edwards eye. So slow I could anticipate his move, he reached out and grabbed her hand.

"Please don't go. Please." He was staring at her now, blatantly pleading, and all I could feel was grief. He was sick with grief.

"You have to let me go, Edward. I'm not good for you." His eyes turned black at her words, but he dropped her hand. She smiled grimly and gestured for me to come with her. Her wording was strange-I'd have to ask her about it. When we were safely outside, she turned to me.

"So I guess we'll be taking your car?"

**I hope that flowed as smoothly as I wanted it to. I also hope Bella's reasoning made sense to you all. A cookie for anyone who can catch my Buffy reference in there!**


	10. No More Silly Talk

**Cookies to all of you who got my Buffy reference-"Cancer of the puppy." One of my favorite lines from Xander, although I can't remember the season. I had a special request for chocolate chip. *hands out virtual cookies***

**Most of you took that chapter better than I thought, so thanks! It seemed...right.**

"Where do you want to go, Bella?" I asked once we were in the car and on our way. At this point I was just driving to drive.

"You tell me. You said we had to stay remote, so you pick." Well, I said I wanted to make my own decisions. I thought of Alaska, but with the Denali's so close I quickly knocked it out of the running. I wanted to go someplace completely unique-someplace I hadn't lived with the Cullens. It would have to be somewhere that we could drive to, because Bella wouldn't be up to flying on a plane and I sure as hell didn't want to swim. Going South was out-too sunny.

"How about Canada? We could head up and stay outside of Quebec. It's mostly remote once you get out of the cities, so you would be safe. And I would be able to go to town, lest we needed something." Surprisingly, Bella chuckled.

"_Lest_, Jasper? Wow, you really _are_ old." And she laughed again. It was a lovely sound-a little bit rougher than wind chimes. Nice, actually. I couldn't prevent the fake frown that crossed my face. She merely raised her eyebrows at me, challenging me to say something. "You know you're old, don't try looking like a hurt kitten." I shook my head.

"I'm going to wait 50 years, and then do the same to you. You just remember that." _If we were still together in 50 years._ I was fairly certain that even if Bella decided to go back to the Cullen's that I probably wouldn't. For no more than a visit, anyway. Even with the lightness of the mood, I still couldn't comprehend the situation I had found myself in. She had been so mad at me-how could she dare leave with me? "Bella, I know we've been over this, but I'm confused."

"About what?" she replied.

"How you could stand to come away with me like this. It just doesn't make sense."

She sighed. "I'll explain it to you one more time, but from this point on I don't want to bring it up again. What you did was wrong-duh! I'm pretty sure a part of me will always be mad at you for it, too. I know it sounds creepy, like I have that weird syndrome that kidnapped people develop sometimes, but in a way I feel free now. Like I can finally be my own person."

"What?!" I cried, hardly believing my ears. Free? I _freed_ her? She was delusional.

"Let me finish! I know I have a family to go back to if this doesn't work out, and I know that they'll completely accept me no matter what. So it's not like you did this and I woke up totally alone. That counts for something, to me. And you made an effort to explain and show me why you did what you did-proving to me that you were genuinely sorry for what had happened, and you tried to make amends." She was pulling her hair back into a ponytail. "I know I said I'd never forgive you for it, but that's just not who I am."

"I know that much. And I appreciate what you've done for me, really. But why didn't you go back with Edward when he came home? You were so sad when he left." It didn't make sense to me, really, how she could love him one minute and then not in the next.

"It might have something to do with this new, wide mind that I have, but when I really thought about it, I found out how mad I was at Edward for leaving. He abandoned me, and even though he said he loved me and he did it because of that, I just don't see it. Once again he stepped over my head and tried to protect me, without really comprehending his actions. I don't think he realizes how much I love him."

"I know he doesn't. I think he pictured you as nothing but fragile and breakable, and that you weren't able to comprehend how much he loved you. That you wouldn't be able to love him as much." He never said so, at least to me, but that would be a completely Edward thing to do.

"He made mention of that several times. And now that I'm…well…new, I could see that for myself. And I need to do something for me, at least this once. I don't want to be treated like a doll even though I'm not anymore. He'll never see me as an equal." She sighed again, but didn't look at me.

"But you still love him." I wasn't asking, I was telling-I could feel it.

"Of course! I didn't wake up _not_ loving him. But it will never be enough for him." And that reminded me of something.

"What you said to him when you left-what was the significance? That you weren't good enough?" This time, she smiled.

"When he left me in the woods, that's what he told me. That I wasn't good for him. My human life may be fuzzy, but I remember _that_ very well." I laughed at her vindictiveness.

"I didn't know you had it in you, Bella." And she grinned.

"I didn't either. So I want to get this out in the open," she said, changing the subject, "We've talked about what happened. I beat you up. You explained yourself. I don't want to talk about it again. I want to start fresh." And I couldn't agree with her more there.

"Okay. I may not understand your reasoning, because I sure as hell wouldn't be okay with it, but I'm not going to say I'm unhappy. I'm sorry for it. End of story." We drove in silence for a while, neither of us finding the need for words. I felt clean. I think that's the only way to explain the feeling-nothing was weighing me down and I was in complete control of myself. After an hour or so, Bella spoke.

"Jasper, do you still love Alice?" She chose the one question that could bring me down from my high.

"Of course I do. We were together for a long time. She brought me to this life. But what happened between us was a long time coming. She's been feeling awkward around me for a while now, even though she did her best to hide it. I don't think we were meant to be together for life." And as I said it, I knew it was true. I will always hold Alice dear to my heart, even though she feels nothing for me any longer. But I'm not sorry we're apart. I needed this fresh start. "Thank you," I blurted. She looked at me curiously.

"For what?"

"For asking me to go. When I think about it, I realize that this is something I needed. I didn't see it myself until you pointed it out. And now I'm glad." That made her smile as she reached over and quickly touched her hand to mine.

"Glad I could help. So…do you know exactly what we're going to do when we get to the middle of nowhere, or are we going to sleep in the car?" I laughed.

"If you find a way to fall asleep, please let me know. I could use a good 30 year nap." It was her turn to laugh. "I think we'll park somewhere and just take the night to learn the 'lay of the land', so to speak. In the morning, I'll make some calls and get us a house. It probably won't be much out here, but it's not like we need a lot of space anyway." It would probably end up being more like a hunting cabin, but we'd manage.

"I don't want anything big anyway. It's only the two of us, after all." _The two of us._ That sounded nicer to my ears than it should have. I quelled that thought quickly. "Can I ask how long I have to stay in seclusion?" her tone was quieter this time. We were finally getting down to business.

"At least a year, to be safe. When you reach about nine months, we'll start testing your strength, venturing closer to town." She nodded.

"What will we do until then?" That was a damn good question. I had no idea. Apparently we lacked thinking that far ahead. We'll be alone, in the wilderness, for at least a year. A thousand things ran through my mind, and I didn't want to take the time to sort through them, not right now.

"I have no idea, little lady. Is there anything you want to do? Perhaps a correspondence course with a college?" There, that was something. _Good thinking!_

"Did you just call me _little lady_?" She asked.

"Yes, I did. I _am_ from the south, after all. So what do you say?" She looked thoughtful. Hell, we could both take some classes online; we'd have plenty of time to fill after all.

"That doesn't sound so bad. But just one or two-I don't want to start out my life as an immortal in school. We could get some books, or movies, and…read…or something…" Or something. Hmm.

We parked now, and we had reached our destination-no where. "Yes, that would be nice. You know what? I'm sure we'll find something to do."

**Oh, what could they _possibly_ do for a year? Guess you'll have to keep reading to find out! And, if you didn't catch it, we've put the proverbial nail in the coffin on the whole 'Jasper eating Bella' thing. Consider this a turning point for the story!**


	11. CONTEST ANNOUNCEMENT

**Hey, everyone! Before you get mad at me for posting this, please know that I've posted MY NEXT CHAPTER immediately after this! So yay!**

**I'm super excited to announce that the C2 that I belong to will be hosting a contest for all you J/B fans!**

**Only the Best Jasper/Bella Presents:**

"**Everything's Bigger in Texas-a Jasper/Bella Fiction Contest!"**

**Categories are as follows:  
Best Darksper/Bella (When Jasper's naughty, everybody wins! Darksper stands for dark Jasper)**

**Best one-shot Jasper/Bella Lemon**

**Best lemon from Jasper/Bella story**

**Best overall Jasper/Bella story COMPLETE**

**Nominations will be taken for two weeks (ending August 4****th****) followed by two weeks of voting.**

**To nominate, please PM myself or one of the following ladies: NCChris, Jasper's Dark Angel, Jaspers Izzy, JaspersBella, JaspersDestiny or see the community-Only the Best Jasper/Bella. The link will be found on my profile. Story title and author's name, please!**

**If anyone has any questions, please don't hesitate to ask! **

**Winners will receive a banner and a feeling of pride.**

**Information will also be posted here: http:// jaspers_darlins(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ check here for updates and the final nominees list on August 5th!**


	12. Please

"I hope this is okay-there wasn't much available in this area." Bella and I walked towards the small hunting cabin that I managed to rent. I had suspicions that we would end up with something like this, but I'd hoped that maybe we'd get lucky. But Bella was smiling and she was feeling pleased as she walked up the wooden steps, spinning as she grabbed the unpainted railing.

"It's perfect!" she squealed. Of course it would be right up her alley. There were only three rooms-a kitchen, a bathroom and a bedroom. The bedroom was the largest room in the house; I thought we could put a couch and a TV in there as well. Bella toured the house and as we entered the bedroom I proposed my idea.

"Maybe we could make this our living room? A couple couches, a TV and a bookshelf, perhaps? Since we have no use for beds." She thought for a moment, but then nodded her head.

"I think that's a great idea. Did you rent this place, or just buy it?" She was curious.

"Rent-why?"

"Well, I was thinking that maybe we could take out the bathroom to make more room-hell, knock out the kitchen too, since we won't really use it. We could just open it into one big space. It looks like we have the attic, too, should we need _solitude."_ She chuckled at the end. It wasn't a bad idea, really-it would make me feel a little less claustrophobic.

"I'm sure we could come to an _agreement_ with our landlord. I'll speak with him in the morning." She smiled and sat down on the floor. I joined her. "What are you thinking?"

"How weird it is to be here, with you, and to feel…like I do." A twinge of embarrassment hit me, but she quickly covered it up.

"Feel like what? I'm getting happiness, and I think I caught a whiff of embarrassment. Why is that?"

"I shouldn't feel happy. At least, I don't feel like I should feel happy-does that make sense? And with you, I don't feel pressure. I don't have to be Alice's Barbie doll, or feel nervous around Rosalie. I'm just…me. I guess that makes me embarrassed because I don't want you to think I'm some sap." She grinned a bit before turning away and I could almost feel the hint of a blush that would have been there.

"It does make sense. I'm the last person I would think you should feel that with. But I'm glad you do. I feel comfortable with you, so I can see your point." We sat like that in comfortable silence for a while, and I realized that we didn't have anything to do. I ordered some things while I was in town getting the house, but that wouldn't arrive for a day or so. All we had was this house and each other. Bella began growing tense, and I can imagine that she was thinking the same thing. Then she giggled.

"Let's play truth or dare." She turned to me, eyes bright, and I had no choice.

"Are you serious? Do I _look_ like a ten year old girl to you?" But I was smiling, and she knew she had won.

"Yep. So I'll go first. Truth or dare?" I rolled my eyes.

"Truth." She thought for a moment.

"Did you want to move in with the Cullen's when Alice brought you to them?" I was expecting her to ask what my favorite color was, but apparently she was getting in deep.

"No. I would have been happy to go off with her on our own, but she had seen them and was desperate to meet them. But she made me happy, so I went with her." There was no reason not to tell her the truth. I think that the Cullen's already knew that, anyway. "Now it's my turn. Truth or dare, Bella?"

"Truth." Testing the waters, was she? I smirked.

"What do you really think of Rosalie?" She frowned at me, throwing her hand at me in a mock slap. "You know the rules-you have to answer! And it's not like I'm going to tell her. Remember, I can tell how you feel, so you better not lie!"

"I can't stand her, okay? She's mean, and full of herself, and she doesn't me for reasons unbeknownst to me. I didn't do anything to her! I can't imagine how Emmett can put up with her." I laughed outright at her admission. I knew that, of course, but it was nice to hear Bella say something bad about someone. Sometimes she was just too good.

"I thought as much. Don't worry, you're not alone. And Emmett is scared of her half of the time."

"Good to know. Your turn-Truth or dare?"

"Dare." Why the hell not? I might as well go all out. Her eyes lit up as she thought for a minute, trying to decide what to have me do. I could feel her growing excited.

"I'm going to have to say take your clothes off. Down to your skivvies, please."

"Excuse me?!" I thought she said to get naked. I must be mistaken.

"I _said_, take your clothes off. What else is there? We don't have anything here so what choice did I have? And weren't you the one who reminded me to follow the rules? You. Naked. Now." She snapped her fingers. I took a deep breath. I stood up and started to unbutton my shirt while Bella sat on the floor and smirked like a monkey with her hand in the cookie jar. I threw it in her face but continued undressing. I pulled my boots and socks off, and then shrugged my pants to the floor. Never in my life had I wished to wear boxers until that moment. I tried to stand tall and proud, but Bella giggled and ruined it. So I sank to the floor and scowled.

"Happy now? Your turn. Take your pick, sugar." She was feeling apprehensive, because she knew I was going to get her back for this.

"Fine. Dare." A slow smile grew on my face as I motioned up and down her body. She wrinkled her brow.

"Turnabout is fair play, little lady. I'd like to see you in _your_ skivvies, now, please." Fear hit me and I shook my head. "You're not getting out of this. I'm in my underwear; it's only fair if you are too. Modesty has no place here." She stood up slowly and started with her shoes. She kicked them off one by one, and then started pulling off her socks. I watched her every move. Hesitating for a moment at the waistband of her jeans, I thought I was going to have to prompt her again. But in a quick flash she pulled them off and threw them at me. She tried to aim for my head-I'm assuming to block my vision, but it didn't work.

"Jasper…" she pleaded, but I shook my head. She reached for the edge of her shirt and pulled it over her head. I watched her hair fall around her bare shoulders and my eyes scanned her torso-I couldn't help myself. She was pleasantly curvy in all the right places-not what I was used to. I chastised myself for having those thoughts, and I tried very hard to not to remind myself that it wasn't the first time. She was still scowling at me as she sat down and folded around herself. "Feel better, ass?" And I laughed again.

"I've never heard you curse before, Bella. It's very unbecoming of a lady." She reached for her shoe and threw it at me.

"I'm sitting here, almost naked, in a room with a man, who is also almost naked. How ladylike is that?" she grumbled. I threw her shoe back.

"It is what it is. And if I'm not mistaken, I believe it's my turn-that is, unless you give up." Her pride surged, and she shook her head.

"I most certainly do not! Take your pick, cowboy." She was mocking me! I thought hard for a moment-this could work very poorly for me in the mood that she's in.

"Truth." Safety first. She was feeling mischievous and I was afraid she'd make me go all out and lose my underwear as well.

"If I wanted-_really wanted_-to go and hunt a human while I was here, would you let me?" A pregnant pause followed until I recovered enough to speak.

"Yes. I'm not…in _charge_ of you, Bella. If that was a decision you wanted to make, I wouldn't stop you. I'd tell you how to clean up and cover your tracks, because I don't think you'd do good in prison, but I wouldn't go with you." I hoped she wasn't serious about this venture, but I didn't lie to her. I was not in a position to tell her what to do. I promised her when she asked me to come with her that I wouldn't let her get into trouble, but knowingly making a decision like that wasn't my responsibility. She looked at me for a moment.

"Why wouldn't you go?"

"Because _I_ don't want to go down that road again. If I were to go with you, the pull of the blood would be too strong and I wouldn't be able to help myself." The temptation was there, though, and I couldn't deny it was an appealing thought. Although I felt deplorable for the humans that I was killing, the _taste…_Bella's voice shook me out of my reverie.

"You're thinking about it, aren't you?" she asked, her voice almost a whisper. She was curious and a little disappointed.

"Yes," I whispered back. "But I chose this life, and I feel good about it." I was trying to talk myself out of the train of thought a part of my brain was having, and it wasn't working. "Is this something you're seriously considering?" She sighed and started playing with her hair. It didn't escape me that we were having this conversation nearly naked, either, but I think she had completely forgotten.

"Yes. No. I don't know!" She threw her hands up in the air. "It's like a part of me really wants to, I don't know, give into that animalistic urge. But then the part of me that's me is screaming at me to stop thinking like that. But I've been thinking about it ever sense you took me to the school that day. And it makes me sick, but I can't help it." She sniffed a little bit, and I could tell how upset this made her.

"Like it or not, Bella, a part of you _is_ different. When you became a vampire, you became a predator. And that predator in you doesn't want to be denied your natural food source. But you still have your humanity. I won't lie to you-if you do this, you'll feel awful afterwards." It might be enough for her to never do it again, actually, but I wasn't going to tell her that.

"What about during?" It was my turn to sigh.

"It'll be the best feeling in the world. Your throat won't burn anymore, and you'd be totally satiated." No point in beating around the bush.

"But you won't go with me." I didn't answer. I _couldn't_ answer, because I wasn't sure. If I was honest with myself, I'd acknowledge the desire. But I didn't know if I could.

"There would be no turning back. It will change you." It would change _me._ But…there was always a but. Wasn't I in this situation because I was tired of people telling me what to do? Didn't I leave the Cullen's so that I could be my own person? And wasn't that why Bella was here?

"I know. But that's part of why I'm here. To do what I want to do and learn about myself." She was echoing my thoughts exactly. "But I'm afraid to go alone. And if I don't like it, I can stop, right?"

"Yes, you can stop. But make no mistake; you won't be the same person you were when you went into it."

"Please." Her murmured plea rang out in silence as I looked at her pleading eyes. She wasn't thinking about this, I knew that. She was still new to this life, and she wanted to give in to her most primal instincts. I could tell that she was conflicted about this, but she made up her mind. And she was afraid. So many reasons to be afraid-which one was she choosing? She hasn't truly seen what she can be yet-she's never let the monster out. "Please, Jasper. Don't make me do this alone. You owe me this." I continued to stare into her eyes as I walked off the edge of my cliff.

"Yes."

**I realize that having them have such a serious conversation naked is kind of weird, but when they started playing the game they didn't know it would get so serious. By the end, they were so focused that they didn't even notice. but don't worry, they didn't completely forget. I'm sure they'll remember in the next chapter.**


	13. I've Got an Itch to Scratch

**Disclaimer: not mine! Pooh. **

**Due to threat of Emmett doing the hokey-pokey on my pillow (I'm afraid he'd break my bed!) I'm giving you two chapters in two days! So...if you're just now getting back to the story, the last chapter was only posted last night! Go, read! And if you're itching for some good B/J reads, head on over to the C2 Only the Best Jasper/Bella. The name speaks volumes.**

"Thank you, Jasper," she said, leaning forward to wrap her arms around me. I hesitated for a moment, but returned the gesture. She had no idea what she was asking. No idea what this would do to her-to me. But when she said I owed her, I knew I had no choice. She must have been desperate for my help to bring that up. But maybe I could keep my distance-if I just went with her and then stayed behind, I wouldn't be tempted. Maybe she would change her mind.

I was so busy thinking of ways to keep my sanity that I didn't notice that we were still in an embrace. And Bella was feeling…warm. It's the best way to describe the way her emotions wrapped around me, unaware of what she was doing, but feeling a little bit turned on. An unconscious feeling on her part. And then I remembered that we were barely dressed. Her body pressed up against me in an innocently erotic way, igniting a part of me that I hadn't felt in a long time. The part of me that was a _man._ With Alice, she was always one step ahead of me. Always the one leading the way. I never felt like she truly _needed_ me, because she always knew what was going to happen. But Bella? She needed me to teach her. To be with her. To let her learn on her own. I felt the primal urge to protect and defend this small woman holding on to me with a ferocity I locked away after the war.

I also wanted to throw her onto the ground and claim every part of her. Against my better judgment, I let my hands move from her back to her waist, where they rested on her hip bones. I drank in the scent of her-she was cinnamon and flowers. She hadn't moved, but she wasn't unaware of what I was doing. She was holding her breath and confusion swirled around her like a fog. That snapped me out of it. I pulled away, shaking my head.

"Bella, I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. Well, I do, but that's no excuse…" surprisingly, she grinned.

"It's because I'm still in my underwear, isn't it?" she laughed. I was glad she could be light hearted about this, and I wasn't going to tell her all of the other things I was feeling.

"Yes. I'm a man, Bella, and I would be ignorant to not feel something towards you in this state. You're rather catching, if I say so myself." She rolled her eyes, but stood up and reached for her clothes.

"What dictionary did you get that phrase from, the first edition?" she chuckled. I scowled at her, but stayed where I was. Standing up would embarrass me further. I would wait until she left the room.

"There's nothing wrong with using proper English, Bella. Why don't you go wait for me on the porch and when I'm dressed, we'll…go." The mood changed; she knew exactly what I was talking about. Nodding, she left the room. I dressed slowly, trying to quell the thoughts I had earlier, but they wouldn't go away. It's as if I unlocked a part of me and it had become the dominant part. I could also no longer deny my attraction to Bella-whether it was just because she _was_ a beautiful woman, or because I was developing feelings for her, I don't know. But I had better just drown those thoughts away, because nothing would ever come of them. When I stepped outside, she was sitting on the steps staring out into the darkness. "Are you ready?" I asked.

She stood up and turned to face me. "As I'll ever be. How will…this…work?" It was too late to find a hiker, which would have been the optimal situation, so I had to think of an alternative.

"It appears that we'll be doing this 'old school' if you will. We'll have to go into town and find someone alone. There won't be any hikers out this late-it's our only choice. You stay by my side until I tell you what to do. Can you handle that?" She was unsure.

"I don't know. I've never been that close to humans before. Will you…hold on to me?" I wanted to tell her that she was by far stronger than I was right now and that if she wanted to break my grasp she easily could, but I wouldn't.

"Yes. Take my hand, and let's go. When we get there, you're going to feel all reason fly out the window. You're going to want to take the first person we come across. But you can't do that, do you understand? You have to wait until I tell you to go. And when I tell you to stop, you must. Am I making myself clear, sugar?" She took a deep breath.

"Yes. Okay. Let's do this." We walked into town slowly, staying behind buildings and in alleys. It was a small town to begin with, and that worked in our favor. I could make this look like a bear attack in no time, and no one would be the wiser. I felt Bella tense as we got closer to the populace, but she didn't try to pull away. I noticed that she wasn't breathing. We waited in an alley that was directly to the left of the bar-not the most appealing clientele, but options were limited.

A few people came out in pairs, and that wouldn't do. Bella tensed and lunged after a couple of them, but I was able to reign her in. I knew deep down she was trying to follow the rules that I had set for her, so maybe that was what was keeping her here. Finally, a lone man came staggering out of the bar. He turned the corner and started walking down the alley we were waiting in. Bella was practically vibrating with the force of her thirst. I turned her to where she was facing me.

"Take him. Don't let him see you-go from behind. And do it quickly-we can't risk getting caught." I let her go.

She was a blur as she flew up behind the man, placing one hand around his waist and the other around his head. She yanked it to the side-by this time, the man had realized that something was wrong and had begun pleading with her. His terror could have brought me to my knees.

"P-please…Take what you want! Just don't hurt me. Don't hurt ME!" He was struggling. Bella was hesitating. I looked at her, trying to urge her to do it without letting on my presence. I felt the mans feelings turn from terror to resignation, as his body went limp. When Bella didn't let go, he gave up. He was smart enough to know that this wasn't a normal mugging, and he was too drunk to think clearly. But he didn't stop pleading. "Please…if you kill me, just…just tell my wife I love her." So quickly I almost didn't see it, Bella dropped the man to the ground and shot past me like a bullet. She ran towards the hills where we were staying-she was going home. The man was still sobbing on the ground. He couldn't be allowed to go home, not like that. That ran the risk of exposure. I walked towards him and knelt down beside him. He didn't even look up. I gave him a sharp blow to the head, just hard enough to knock him out. I hoped with the combination of his drunkenness and the confusion of the darkness that he would think he fell and hit his head. I left him there to wake up on his own.

When I got back to the house, Bella was curled on the floor in the far corner of the room. She barely glanced in my direction as I came and sat beside her.

"Do you understand what I was trying to tell you before? How much that would have changed you? You don't just take the life of one person, Bella, you take the lives of many." She sniffed and nodded her head.

"Oh, God, Jasper! What did I almost do? How could I have…I don't like feeling this way! I feel…crazy. I can't decide what I want to do one minute, and then I'm all bloodthirsty the next! I don't know how I managed to run away from him-that's the sad thing! I _wanted_ it. But then he said the thing about his wife, and I just…lost it. I thought about if that was Phil, or Charlie, and that he's probably got kids somewhere, an I just couldn't do it. But I could have! I'm not making any sense!" I grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at me.

"Bella, you are a newborn vampire. That is _exactly_ how we all felt in the beginning. And if you hadn't hunted before you decided this, I don't think you would have been able to stop. The desire is always going to be there, you just have to learn to control it. You have to remember that feeling. But it's not always going to be enough. Sometimes…you slip." Here I was, giving _her_ a lesson in control! Her eyes were burning with the intensity of her feelings.

"It's like I have all this energy and I don't have anywhere to put it! It's thirst and thoughts and having too much room in my head. And I don't get tired, and my body never feels worn out. I just feel supercharged all the time!" I should have seen it coming. I've dealt with enough newborns to know that sometimes they lose control. And it doesn't always have to deal with blood. And Bella was out of control.

She flew at me, knocking me to the ground. Before I could recover, she pressed her lips to mine, desperately trying to release her abundance of energy. She took the first natural outlet she could think of. Her hands clawed at my hair as she placed her legs on each side of mine, effectively pinning me to the ground. She was turned on, and upset, and angry all at once-she didn't know what else to do. I should have stopped her. I should have snapped her out of this, brought her back down to earth. But I didn't.

Instead, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer to me. I yanked at her shirt until I had ripped it to shreds; all the while our lips never parted. The force of her hands hurt as she clawed her way down my body, pulling at every inch of clothing she could find. She writhed against me, desperate for contact, and I arched into her-there was nothing else I could have done. And it was _glorious._ She covered me-the smell of her, the feel of her, all of it. I was drunk on her.

"Please…" she moaned as her lips bombarded mine. "Please make it stop…." She was desperate to find an outlet. There was enough of me left to think this through. I could let this continue-I could take her over the edge and make her feel better. Make her feel normal again, if only for a moment. But I didn't know if I _should._ She didn't know how to cope with these emotions, and this…this wasn't the best way. Would it be taking advantage of her? Because I wanted this so much, but all she wanted was a release. I knew there were other ways to help her. I just didn't know if I gave a damn.

**Sorry! I had to do it. But I bet you feel better about Bella and Jasper not taking out that guy at the bar, huh? And I don't want you all to think I've given her super self control, because I didn't. I just let her mind win one of the battles. Hmmm...what's our Jasper going to do?**


	14. Rebel

**Okay, so you guys were split about 50/50 on which direction you wanted Jasper to go. And honestly, I had a hard time myself. But when I sat down to write this chapter, well, let's just say it is what it is. Please dont' excute me if it didn't go the way you wanted it to, but...well, it's too late now, right? ;)**

_Yesyesyesyesyes _my body screamed as Bella pressed herself closer and closer to me until there was almost no room left. _If I wanted, I could remove _all_ space from between us…_I was trying-futilely-to keep my logical mind in play, but damn it, she was making it hard. Her hands clawed at my shirt until there was nothing left; her fingerprints were leaving marks on my skin as well. Her body writhed with the need for contact as my hands wandered her body of their own accord. "Oh, _God_, Jasper, please!" she pleaded as she pulled my lower lip between her teeth and bit. I snarled as I pulled her roughly to me, flipping myself in a position that I was on top.

_I can't let myself do this!_ I thought as I tried to reason with myself. She didn't want _me_, she wanted some sort of a release, and I _knew_ it was wrong. I knew it! But all I could feel was her want and I hadn't felt wanted like this in so long…And she smelled so fucking _good…_

"I know this is bad, but I just want to feel better!" she screamed at me as she felt my hesitation. "You could help me, I know you want to. Please!" Her fury and desire only fueled my fire, and I was _so close_ to giving in…

"Bella, there are other ways. I could help you, but not like this." I tried to reason with her with what little part of me wanted to. "You'll only feel better for a little while, and you'll regret it!" Her hands were working furiously to pull off my belt, and it was like she hadn't heard a word I was saying. Had she still been human, I'm certain that would have been the case.

"I don't _care!_ I won't regret it, I swear I won't!" she cried as she gave up and ripped my belt in two, throwing the pieces on opposite ends of the room. I growled in frustration at myself, but I didn't stop her. I was past the point of physical restriction.

"I don't _want_ to TAKE you like this, Bella!" I snarled. Damn it, if I was anything, it was a gentleman, and I was trying very hard to keep it like that. But she wasn't asking for me to be a gentleman. She'd had her gentleman, and where did that get her? I scorned myself for that brief thought.

"TAKE ME, JASPER!" she screamed. Her eyes were blazing and she was staring at me with such a glare that I almost flinched. "I'm begging you to just…fucking…take me!" To hear her say those things-to talk to me like that-it made me snap. I ripped off her shirt in one quick motion, tossing the remains in the corner and making short work of the rest of her clothes. My pants followed suit-I could hear her low, steady growl as I peeled them off.

"Don't you regret this in the morning," I whispered as I forced my lips on hers, pushing her into the floor so hard that I was sure it made a dent. My hands wasted no time getting acquainted with her breasts. There was no gentleness to this, although a part of me knew that there should be. I let one hand travel down her torso until I reached the softer flesh of her most private place. She was more than ready for me. My fingers moved around her folds, dipping once or twice into her center as she moaned beneath me. She was enveloped in desire and nothing else-she was functioning with her body only.

I positioned myself between her legs, finally taking a moment to look her in the eyes. "This shouldn't hurt you now that you're a vampire, but if it does-bite me." She nodded, not bothering to tense up at all. Logically, something like this shouldn't bring any pain, but I've never been with a virgin vampire before. With one quick motion I pushed inside of her. She never let on that it hurt-quite the opposite. Her body arched into mine, bringing us closer together than I would have thought possible. She felt _glorious…_better than anything. The best. We moved together at a frantic pace. Her unnecessary breaths were coming in sharp gasps as she met me thrust for thrust. I felt myself coming closer and closer…

I let fingers rub circles around her clit, and before too long she was clenching around me, her body arched nearly off the floor. "_Yes,_ Jasper!" she cried, and I joined her with my climax. I stayed above her for just a moment before rolling to the side and looking at her.

Her eyes were closed and she was relieved and content for the first time in weeks.

I, on the other hand, felt deplorable. It's no surprise, really-I knew that would happen. It was inevitable. What is _wrong_ with me?! I couldn't be in the same room as her right now, so I got up, slung my jeans on and went to sit on the front porch. I felt like a child in time out, sent to think about what I had done. What _had _I done, exactly? Let's see-I took advantage of her, knowing full well that her newborn state of mind was getting the better of her. I took her _virginity_ on top of it all. And I didn't feel the least bit bad about it during the act. In fact, it was the best thing I've ever felt. I let my head fall into my hands as I let out a groan of frustration.

"Jasper?" she asked, padding up quietly behind me. "Please don't feel bad. I didn't mean to make you do that. But I feel better than I have in weeks." She sat down beside me, and I could feel her worry.

"I shouldn't have done that. It wasn't right." I was doing a hell of a job trying to explain my morals _afterwards_.

"Why not? Why isn't it right?" she asked indignantly.

"It's just not! Bella, I _took_ your virginity. And I wasn't even gentle about it! I'm supposed to be a fucking gentleman, and I just…God, I just had you on the floor!" I was so disgusted with myself I could almost throw up-had it been possible.

"I asked you to, Jasper. Okay, so it may not have been the best way to relieve whatever it was I was feeling, but it worked, didn't it? Can't you tell I feel better?" Was she _mad_?

"You're missing the point. You're not mine to take. We…" I didn't know how else to explain my sense of logic-obviously I wasn't going to get through to her.

"I don't belong to anyone! And isn't that what this whole 'moving away' thing was all about? To find ourselves and do what we wanted to do for once? Damn it Jasper, that's what I wanted to do and I'm not going to feel bad about it!" She took my head and forced me to look at her. "We're adults. I know you're waiting for the bomb to drop-waiting for me to run crying into the other room screaming things about being taken advantage of. But I'm not going to. Whether you realize it or not, you just gave me something. You gave me an experience that I'm not going to feel bad about, and you shouldn't either."

"Please don't take this the wrong way, Bella, but I wouldn't have pegged you for casual sex."

"It wasn't casual. I know you. I'm comfortable with you. Okay, so I went about it in kind of a crazy way, but it's like I couldn't think about anything else. Like once I figured out that I needed some kind-any kind-of release, I just acted. I had to do something, or I would have gone crazy. I'm not making any sense, am I?"

"Not really. I feel like you're trying to justify what we did. I can't. I know that being a newborn makes you crazy-trust me, I've worked with plenty. But _I'm_ not a newborn. I should have had better control than that. There are other ways that you can relieve that tension. And from now on, that's what we'll focus on. I can't let _that_ happen again."

"Why didn't you stop me then?" I sighed at her question.

"I didn't want to. I'm a man, Bella, and you were pushing all the right buttons. I could feel that you wanted me, and it made me…drunk. I hadn't felt wanted like that in a long time, and I let it get the better of me."

"Then I'm not sorry." She said, sounding like a child. All she had to do was stomp her foot and the image would be complete. I looked at her and just raised my eyebrows.

"We could argue these points forever, but I don't see an end. Instead, why don't we focus on finding you another outlet before you…snap…again." She frowned, but nodded. I felt a little vibrate in my pocket, and realized it was my phone. The name on the caller id made me blanch. "It's Alice," I said to Bella, who's expression immediately matched mine.

"Aw, Crap."

"Hello, Alice," I answered, cringing.

"_What the hell, Jasper?!"_

**And just so you know, when I planned this chapter out, that wasn't going to happen. But I'm happy with it. But I wanted to reflect Bella as different than she's often portrayed in these kinds of stories, but not skew her personality completely. So...yeah.**


	15. Come and Get Me

**So, so sorry for the shortness of this little chappy, but I thought the next chapter deserved to be a little longer. You'll see *grins wickedly***

**Thanks to my beta, cullen818, who didn't say anything about the briefness of the chapter, which made me happy. Much love!**

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I lied, knowing full well that it wasn't going to fly. But I needed a minute to figure out just what the hell I was going to say to her. I knew I shouldn't feel bad, because hey-she _left_ me. But I couldn't help myself. And considering the barrage of guilt coming from Bella, I'm guessing that she felt bad too.

"_You know damn good and well what I'm talking about, Jasper Whitlock! You _can't_ play dumb with me! What were you thinking?!"_ she screeched.

"What does it matter, Alice? We're not together anymore, remember? And as I recall, I had nothing to do with that." _Ha! Take that, _I thought.

"_I realize that. But you should have known better! She's a newborn-she doesn't know what she's doing! Were you just—" _But she was cut off. I heard a struggle for the phone. For some reason I couldn't think of who would be fighting with Alice to talk to _me_. I should have known.

"_I'm coming for you, Jasper." _Edward's silky voice said before he hung up the phone. Bella sat across from me, wide-eyed and terrified, as I stared at the phone with no one on the other end.

"But I really like this house," Bella said with a whimper.

"We can't run, Bella. And we have no reason to. He's just overreacting, I'm sure. The rest of the family won't let him-surely they'll stop him before he does something rash. And what if he does? You said it yourself-we've done nothing wrong." I didn't believe that for a second, but if she wanted to fight this fight, I wasn't going to stop her. He'd be more apt to listening to her than me anyway.

She snorted. "Yeah, because Edward will believe _that._ He's the epitome of self-denial, and there you go all 'having-sex-with-Bella' on him. He's going to flip, and you know it. He's probably on his way right now." She was trying to play it cool, but I could feel the trickle of fear that was threatening to take over.

"Relax. If he comes, he won't hurt _you._ He'll tell me that I 'shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that', and that I 'should have acted differently.'" I said in a mock impression of Edward. "I think you should call Carlisle." Her head whipped in my direction as if she couldn't believe what I had just proposed.

"_Me_? Why me? Why can't you call Carlisle?" She glared at me. I sighed.

"Because everyone's going to see you as the innocent one. It's not your fault, they'll say. So in effect it would be best if they spoke with you and not me." Truth be told, I didn't want to hear the disappointment in his voice. Even if I couldn't feel it, I knew it would be there. Bella snatched the phone from my hand, huffing at me in displeasure. It only had to ring once.

"_Jasper? What's going on?" _I heard Carlisle ask, worry dripping almost through the phone.

"It's Bella. Um…Why don't you tell me what happened on your end?" I laughed. "Good thinking," I mouthed.

"_Alice had a vision and then stepped outside to make a phone call. She didn't tell any of us what it was about. Edward followed her, they argued for a minute, and then Edward left. Alice came in long enough to tell us she was following, but that was all. They were too far away for us to hear the conversation that caused the fight, so I'm not sure where they're going." _I visibly relaxed. At least she didn't degrade me in front of everyone. Bella pondered for a moment before continuing.

"Edward's not very happy with something Jasper and I did. But don't worry! It wasn't anything bad. You know Edward, he's Mr. Overreacts-a-lot. I'm sure Alice will straighten him out. Everything's fine!" she squeaked at the end, hanging up quickly. "Oh, thank God!" she sighed, tossing the phone back at me. I raised my eyebrows in her direction.

"If what we did wasn't wrong, why are you so worried about the family finding out?" I prodded.

"I-well…because it's none of their business!" she huffed, but I laughed at her.

"Okay, whatever you say. But we do need a plan of action. Edward's fast-Alice might not be able to intercept him." We'd barely been gone and we were already facing another confrontation. I must have been crazy to think that we could just leave for a year.

Bella smiled. "Let him come. He can deal with me. It's time he learned that I'm not something to be protected. I got this." She smirked again, radiating nothing but excitement. I had to admit, I was a little worried. She was right, though, she could take care of herself. Now more than ever.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"Don't worry about it. You'll see. Unless, by some miracle, Edward came to his senses and went home. Which isn't likely." I grinned.

"I must admit-I love this side of you, sugar." I winked, letting her excitement filter through me. Why not enjoy this? She's got something up her sleeve, something that sounds like a lot of fun. My phone buzzed again, breaking me from my thoughts. Alice again.

"_I can't catch him," _she giggled. Giggled? What the hell? _"But don't worry. Everything will be fine."_ She giggled again.

"Okay, Alice, you're scaring me. What's with the change of heart? Not too long ago you were ready to rip my heart out and eat it for what I did."

"_I never said that. But you still shouldn't have done it. I'm not sure you understand the repercussions of your actions, and that's what I was calling to tell you. I know you're not mine anymore, Jasper. I made that choice, and I have to live with it. But so do you. Remember that. You've changed everything. But as for Edward,"_ she said, lightening up again, _"he'll get what's coming to him."_ She laughed again before hanging up the phone.

"That was weird," I mumbled, trying to decipher what she meant.

"What? I wasn't paying attention." Bella asked with a faraway look on her face.

"Alice said not to worry. She found something funny, but wouldn't tell me what." I chose to leave out the rest of the conversation, deciding that I would worry about that later. _You've changed everything_ was what stuck with me the most.

"Yes, I imagine she would," Bella said, again in a faraway sort of way. So Alice must have seen what Bella had in mind, and found it funny. I lightened up considerably at the prospect. Well if that was the case, I was looking forward to it!

"She didn't say how long we had-my guess is that he'll be here by morning. He's very fast." She didn't say anything, still lost in her thoughts. I decided to embrace the silence with her. I laid back on the floor and we waited.

**You see? I totally have a reason. **

**And also...**

**Voting is now open for the "Everything's Bigger in Texas Jasper/Bella fanfiction contest!"**

**To see the list of nomations, please go to: http://jaspers_darlins(dot)livejournal(dot)com/**

**You can vote there if you have a livejournal account, so go ahead and log in!**

**If you DO NOT have a LJ account, please email us at: jaspers_darlins(at)hotmail(dot)com**

**or**

**PM anyone of us on the C2, including myself!**

**Voting will be open through August 18th, with winners announced on August 19th! One vote per category, please.**

**so go vote! you know you want to.**


	16. Choose Right

**Disclaimer: not mine! **

**I'm totally sneaking this one past my Beta, cullen818, because I got this done way faster than I had planned, and I LIKE it and want to get it out *tee hee* But, had I not snuck it past and in fact got it Beta'd, I'm sure she would have done a super-fantastic job, so kudos for that anyway :)**

**I've got two recommendations this week that I've been meaning to point out FOREVER. First: Visceral by four-letter-word is AWE-SUM. like, zOMG awesome. I don't normally go for stories like this, cause it's kind of OOC, but kind of not-know what I mean? But it's woven wonderfully and it's got some tasty lemonade in it. **

**Second- Acting on Faith by oceanwaters2006. The chapters are short, but they're full of so much that if they were longer, it would probably make less sense. It's so freakin' good that I could cry. **

**And one more thing-I have to give a shout-out to mystripedskirt, whom often refers to Edward as Assward in her reviews, which makes me laugh. Every time. It's my favorite Edward nickname next to I'mdoingitforherowngoodward, and I couldnt' tell you where I saw that one.**

I don't know how long we sat and waited, neither of us saying anything. Every so often I'd feel a spark of amusement roll around Bella, but they left as fast as they came. Before too long, dawn was breaking and soft light began filtering in through the bare windows. "The furniture should be coming today," I said absentmindedly. Bella didn't respond, only smiling in my direction. The leaves rustled outside. I could feel his anger. Anger and betrayal. "We have company," I said. I stood to greet him, but Bella motioned for me to stop.

"I got this," she said as she moved towards the door, throwing it open. "Come any closer and you'll regret it," Bella warned, but as per usual Edward didn't listen.

"Bella, move! Let me past!" he yelled as he tried to come forward. At this point, I had moved to get Bella's back. Apparently she didn't need it.

"I warned you…" she growled as she leapt off the porch in a move so quick I almost didn't catch it. I had forgotten how quick newborns were. She knocked him to the ground and straddled his waist, bringing her fists down on his torso.

"What the—" he screeched, thrown off for the first time in his life. I couldn't help but laugh. "Bella, what are you _doing?_!" He couldn't even bring his arms up to defend himself.

"I'm teaching you a _lesson,_ Edward! I _tried_ to tell you when I left that you couldn't control me. But did you listen? Of _course_ not! You come storming over here like you give a damn, but you really only care about controlling me!" she punched him again, hard, in the chin. I swear I saw a piece break off. I leaned against the doorframe and settled in to enjoy the show.

"What? No, Bella! You've got it all wrong! I love you! And he _violated_ you! I was coming to…" he was cut off by a sharp blow to the forehead.

"Nope! Wrong again, Eddie! You're here because you can't _stand_ the fact that I _had sex_ with someone else. But you wouldn't! That's the kicker! You _left _me, remember? And then I left you! You're here because I finally started making my own decisions, and you don't like it!" she brought both fists down on his chest again, and I saw the breath leave him.

"You're not thinking, though! You're acting on instincts that you can't control! And he's letting you. And you're letting him! After what…" a kick to the side.

"Don't even go there! We've been through this. I've been through this. And now I want you to _go away!_" she flew off of him and landed in a perfect crouch. Edward scuttled backwards, but never rose to his feet.

"Can't you just…come back home?" Oh, he was asking for it now. I chuckled again.

"Home? This is my home. I like it here. And I'm doing this my way. For once, I'm doing this my way. And in the future, if I want to come back, I will. But I won't come back to you." Even I was a little surprised with that. I thought that once Bella was able to think straight and control herself better that she would go running back to him. I thought she was just angry. Apparently her emotions ran a little bit deeper than that. Edward just stared at her, dumbfounded. But he was deeply hurt-that was what was coming through the most. "You never let me live my life, Edward. And now that I have eternity to do so, that's exactly what I plan on doing. I don't think you'll ever be able to see me as more than a child who needs protecting, no matter how invincible I am now."

"But—" He tried again. Lord help him, he's resilient. For the first time today he turned to me. "You don't know what you've done. What Alice saw…" he shook his head. "You've taken everything." His anger was building fast. Bella stepped in front of me.

"Make one more step towards him and it _will_ be your last." She growled, a low snarl building deep in her chest.

"You protect him now?" he snarled back, turning his anger onto her.

"He probably doesn't need my protecting. But I'm proving my point. Go. Now. I don't want to fight again." He snarled again, but turned to walk away. Before he picked up speed, he turned to me again.

"This isn't over. She _is_ mine." Then he was gone. Bella turned towards me, and energy sparkled around her almost visibly.

"Can I say something, Bella?" she nodded. "That was _the_ hottest thing I have ever seen." On so many levels. The raw emotions, the power, the determination…I couldn't help but lick my lips.

"I feel…" she started, but she didn't have to finish. I could tell how she felt. It was lust and strength and desire and joy all rolled into one, and it was great. I only stared-I didn't need to say anything. She knew. Bella launched herself at me, closing the space between us in no time at all. I caught her, letting one hand wrap around her waist and the other steady myself on the doorframe. Her legs flew around me and her hands stuck themselves in my hair. I let my lips wander the base of her neck around and up to her chin before making claim on her lips. I wasn't going to fight it this time. After that…I couldn't.

"I would have thought you learned your lesson the first time, _husband._" Damn. Damn! Alice! I groaned.

"What are you doing here, Alice? Bella took care of Edward, there was no need to come rushing to our aid." I scoffed, as if that's why she was here. She probably saw this happening and came to stop us. Bella was still wrapped around me, but she was feeling too embarrassed to move.

"Not that I don't love the little scene before me, but that's not why I'm here. I'm here, Jasper, to make you think. And Bella? Stop acting like a scared little puppy-I'm not going to hurt you. _You're_ at least an uncontrollable newborn. I'd just like to hear his excuse." Her hands were on her hips and she was staring at us like she was our mother and we just got caught stealing cookies. But she wasn't angry, and that was a relief. Bella climbed down and turned to face Alice.

"I just can't think straight. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!" Bella's emotions had taken a complete 180 and now she was sobbing. Guilt was sticking to her like honey.

"I know that. I'm not mad at you, Bella. It's not my place to be anymore. But Mr. Southern Charm over there has some explaining to do." I scowled in her direction.

"Why do you keep saying that? What do I need to think about? We've done nothing wrong." I shrugged, trying to show the casualness of the situation. I could tell Alice didn't believe me for a minute.

"This" she pointed between Bella and I, "is bigger than you think. I think that you're forgetting, Jazzy, that it's our little Bella in that uncontrollable shell. Soft, shy, trusting, _loving_ Bella. She's going to wake up from this mess she calls her emotions." I still didn't understand.

"Do you have a point, or are you just here to play fortune teller?" I snapped, angry at her cryptic words. She sighed.

"Bella, you stay here. I've got to talk to Jasper alone, for just a minute. And I'll know if you try and follow." She motioned for me to follow her away from the house. I didn't say anything, only projecting my distaste at the situation until we were far enough to speak.

"What, Alice? What's so important?" She rounded on me and the look in her eyes was so intense that it made me stumble backwards.

"That's the thing! I can't tell you, or it will ruin it! But I see two outcomes, and they both depend on you! You can't choose wrong. But I can't tell you what's right. You just have to remember that it's Bella in there. Bella. Do you understand me? She's not herself right now-at least not all the way. But she's _in_ there!" her determination vibrated around her like nothing I've ever seen.

"What do you mean? Is this what Edward was talking about? That I take everything? What am I taking?" I couldn't fit the pieces together. It didn't make sense.

"When the time comes, you'll know. You just…have to choose right. Okay? Just…pay attention, and choose right." She had approached me and was shaking me by the shoulders to make her point. I missed the contact-I missed her. I thought back to all the years we spent together, how much I loved her. She shook her head. "I'm not for you anymore, Jasper. You're not for me. Come on-we've got to get back. If we leave Bella alone for another…" she closed her eyes, "30 seconds she's going to bolt and come after us."

I followed her back to the house in stunned silence, trying to make sense of her words. Not for her? What does that mean? Bella was waiting on the porch, trilling with anticipation. She looked back and forth between us for a moment before settling her eyes on Alice.

"You're keeping something from me. I can tell."

"Of course I am, but that's besides the point. I've got to get back now and help Edward nurse his wounds. I'd also like to see Emmett's face when he finds out-I need a good laugh." She walked up to Bella and put her arms around her. Bella smiled and leaned in. "You can't turn back now, Bella. Remember that." She whispered. Bella was confused, but she nodded in agreement. She was well accustomed to taking Alice's words to heart. With a last fleeting look in my direction, she took off.

"What was that all about?" Bella asked.

"She was just being…Alice. But don't worry, I didn't understand a word she said." I stuck my hands in my pocket-something was in there. I pulled out a crumpled piece of paper that I knew wasn't there when I walked out of the house.

_Perfect, thee name, like a cool autumn breeze, words escape thy, I whisper only, "please" your skin is a diamond a sparkle of snow, never age affect thee, forever you'll glow. A woman, any woman would give you her heart, like the summer do you warm it? Or winter tear it apart? worth the gamble, thy'd pay any price, for thee to smile upon thy and give meaning to life._

It was Alice's handwriting.

**Poem's by an unknown author, fits crypitc little pixie perfectly, and says everything she couldn't say before. Think about _that_ why don't you ;)**

**Don't forget, voting has opened in the "Everything's Bigger in Texas Jasper/Bella fanfic contest!" check out http://jaspers_darlins(dot)livejournal(dot)com/**


	17. Harder, Faster, Longer

**Disclaimer: I'm a sad kitty because this doesn't belong to me. **

**Holy Crow-cullen818 is the greatest Beta ever. Got this chappy beta'd in like 2 hours-just long enough for me to finish it and proceed to scarf down one of those giant burgers from Mcdonalds. (Which was just so-so if you're asking.)**

**Thank you to everyone sticking with this story-I remember when it was only going to be a story-lette! But now I'm too far deep.**

**So I thought, for a change, we'd switch up the main POV. So...**

**Let's hear from Bella!**

Bella's POV

Everything was always bright and loud- I never missed anything and it was always happening so fast that I didn't know which direction to run. I felt like I was spinning out of control but watching myself fall at the same time-like I could see the tornado sucking me in and no matter which way I went I couldn't get away. My emotions were so strong all the time that I'm surprised that Jasper could stand to be in the same room as me. I'm not Bella anymore. I'm thirsty all the time. The burn was so bad that I wanted to claw out my throat. I actually thought about it once, but then I realized that even if I did it would probably grow back and that would hurt like hell. I thought I wouldn't miss sleep, but I was wrong. I missed being able to turn off for a few hours. I'd give my right arm to have just a few minutes to turn off now-but it would probably grow back.

And then Alice shows up all "la la la I can't tell you anything' and that made my head even fuller! And it made me kind of mad. Jasper was brooding because he couldn't figure it out either, and his negativity was affecting me in the worst kind of way. We had furniture now though, so he could sit and brood on the couch while I sat and glared at him from the chair.

"Give me the damn letter, Jasper." I told him, sick of that puzzled look on his face.

"No." he replied shortly, not even looking in my direction.

"Then put it down and do something else, because you're making me feel all yucky."

He sighed. "Sorry. I just can't figure it out. It's driving me crazy!"

"You know what would help? Throw it away. Stop worrying about it. Maybe we could go for a hunt! I'm so freaking hungry I could eat a squirrel." He laughed at me but stood up and put the letter on the dresser.

"I promise you wouldn't like it if you did. But you're right, it's been too long. Let's go." I jumped up and clapped my hands as we walked out the back door. He laughed again. At least he was feeling better, so I didn't have to feel like an ass anymore. I never cussed when I was with Edward…hell, not even when I was human. Jasper must be a bad influence on me…

We reached our 'hunting ground' as I called it, each of us going in a different direction. We were never far from each other, but it wasn't necessary to be together this far out. I preferred to be alone when I hunted anyway-I still felt gross when I came back and it gave me a chance to clean up a bit before Jasper saw me. He knew of course, but I still felt better when I wasn't covered in blood and dirt. There was a stream nearby that I used. I took down a moose with ease, only mildly enjoying the hot tanginess as it flowed down my scorched throat. It wasn't all that great, but I figured it would probably get better as I got used to it. Besides, did I really have a choice? Jasper always took a little longer than I did-that was probably why I was so messy-so I headed down to the stream to clean up. I pulled off my shirt and threw it to the side as I knelt down by the water. It had snowed the night before, so the ground was coated in a thick white powder. Cold didn't bother me anymore, thank God, so I enjoyed the feeling of the water on my face and chest.

"Oh, I'm sorry-I thought you were done…" I heard Jasper behind me. I wasn't paying too much attention, apparently. I stood up and whipped around to face him.

"No big deal. I was cleaning up…" I stopped as I felt unabashed lust wash over me. Jasper was staring at me, eyes black. Odd-he'd just hunted…they should be all kinds of gold by now. And then I looked down. Note to self: buy a bra. I threw my arms up to cover myself and thanked the heavens that I couldn't blush anymore-otherwise I'd be the color of a tomato right now. "Oh my God! I forgot….I'm sorry…" I looked frantically for my shirt, finding it a few feet to my right. Jasper hadn't moved. He wasn't reining in his emotions either, because that shot of lust I felt a minute ago was getting worse. And I really was trying to not think about that because I didn't need to get myself into anymore trouble! But once I looked into Jasper's coal eyes, I couldn't look away. I couldn't move. And I couldn't stop that annoying little coil that was building up in my stomach.

"My God…" he growled, stalking towards me. Okay, I may not be that experienced, but _that_ had to be the sexiest thing ever. Jasper's deep growl sent a fire through me that burnt up all reason and modesty (which I had very little of here lately). I dropped my arms. He reached me in seconds, pushing me to the ground and wasting no time before finding my lips and kissing me roughly. I wasn't going to stop him, though I probably should considering we weren't a couple, but I couldn't. It made me feel good and calm and that was something I needed. I threw my head back, letting him have access to my chin as my hands clawed at his shirt, ripping it to shreds (again, I'm pretty sure.) He had snow in his hair-my _God_ that was hot…His hands slid to find my breasts, one in each hand. His fingers knew just what to do as they pinched and rubbed, causing me to cry out.

"God, Jasper!" I cried, arching into him. My hands made furious work of his belt. I was able to slide his pants down to a point where he could wriggle them off-needless to say I was thrilled that he'd made my mistake and forgotten an article of underclothes.

"Say my name again, Bella," he whispered, clearly enjoying himself more this time.

"Jasper…" I murmured again, letting my hand tentatively grasp his shaft. Last time, there was no time for this, so I was enjoying exploring him this time around. He was so smooth…I gripped a little harder, but kept my strength in check. (The back part of my mind wondered if _that_ would grow back.) He ground himself into my hand as he nipped at my neck roughly. His right hand moved to my pants, undoing the button and then the zipper. I lifted myself up a bit to allow him to pull them down, and then I kicked them off. He pinched at the sides of my underwear, tearing them off in one quick motion. And then he was in me and it was heaven all over again. "Please!" I cried, needing more and needing it quickly. He pushed in again, harder, and again…

I clung to his back as he pressed me further and further into the snow-it stuck to our bodies but I didn't even feel it. It just made him more beautiful. He thrust harder and harder and faster and faster until I felt like I could explode and _Oh God_ it was wonderful. His hand grabbed me roughly and his kissed became fevered as we both came closer to the edge. He let his right hand move to my most sensitive little nub, rubbing faster and faster until stars exploded and I couldn't feel anything but Jasper and I didn't care if he ever left inside of me. I could do this forever. I pushed myself closer to him until there was no space between us. I felt him tense inside me, letting go of all of his tension moments after I did.

"Yes, Bella, Yes!" he cried, hand fisted in my hair. He rolled to the side a moment later, and I turned towards him. His eyes were closed.

"We should probably stop doing that." I told him, letting my hands play with his hair.

"I don't care anymore, Bella, because nothing that _good_ could possibly be bad for me." I laughed at his reasoning, but I'd be lying if I said I was sad. I loved this feeling-calm and happy and _normal_-and if this was what it took to get there, then by all means sign me up.

"Except next time let's not do it in the snow."

Jasper's POV

"Okay." I whispered, unable to believe that I had just agreed to an _again. _But I couldn't help it. I came up to get her, but when she turned around…all I could see was how beautiful she was. Standing in the snow, topless and unaware…it was glorious. It didn't help that she had the most perfect pair of breasts that I'd ever seen, either. And I thought, "Why stop this?" I wanted her-I wouldn't deny that anymore-and she wanted me. At least, she wanted the release that I could give her. Alice had me so wound up with her poem and warning that I just sort of snapped at the sight of her. I wasn't watching my emotions, so I knew she could feel what I wanted. I could tell the moment that it got to be much for her. And her lust and my lust together-it was great. Fan-fucking-tastic, to be exact. And the way she said my name…_my _name. I wouldn't feel bad for this-not anymore. There's no harm in having a little fun, right?

**I couldn't resist the lemonade here. **

**Don't forget, voting is now open, for one more week, in the Everything's Bigger in Texas J/B fanfic contest! Head on over to http://jaspers_darlins(dot)livejournal(dot)com/ to see the list of nominees and to vote (you can also email or PM votes if you don't have a LJ account.) All the stories nominated are great reads!**


	18. Visitors

**Disclaimer: not mine. *sigh***

**Cullen818 gets a naughty Jasper as a thank you from me for being such a super Beta!**

We'd been in the cabin for three months when Bella finally started to show a little control. She was far from being considered 'human safe' as she called it, but she had stopped throwing her emotions all over the place. We had been primarily left alone for those months with the exception of Carlisle calling to check in every few weeks. No Alice or Edward-it was refreshing. Bella and I had a smooth kind of compromise as well-when her frustrations would mount up and I would help 'ease' them. Otherwise, we didn't talk about it. That didn't mean that I didn't _think _about it. I thought about it quite a lot, actually. And after a while, I stopped thinking about how good _it_ felt and started thinking how good _she_ felt. And how nice she smelled. And how beautiful she was no matter what she was doing. And that's when I realized I had a problem. Because I _shouldn't_ be feeling those things for her. I should be helping her through her first newborn year, not having sex with her every time she got angry. Currently, she was sitting on the couch flipping through a magazine that had come in the mail. She moved to turn the page and pulled it right off.

"Damnit," she mumbled as she put the page roughly back into the magazine. She was still having trouble controlling her strength-she forgot how strong she was sometimes. It pissed her off, but I thought it was funny as hell. She caught me smirking out of the corner of my eye. "I'm glad this is so fucking funny to you, Jasper. Really, I'm glad." She spat, throwing what was left of the magazine at me. I only laughed harder. She was adorable when she cursed.

"You'll get used to it, Bella. We all had that problem in the beginning. You just have to remember you're stronger than the average bear now." She glared at me like she was angry, but I could feel her undercurrent of amusement at my joke. The sun came through the window at that moment-must be dawn-and the rays hit her face. The way she glittered to me would never get old. I may have seen thousands of vampires in all my years, but she was by far the most exquisite. _And there you go again, Jasper, mooning after her when you have no right._ She started waving her hand in front of my face.

"You in there, Jazzy? What's your problem lately?" she asked. And I wouldn't tell her. I searched her emotions all the time, trying to find some semblance of the same feelings from her. Anything that wasn't just pure sexual desire. And I couldn't. I knew she cared about me, but it just wasn't the same.

"Sorry. I don't have a problem. I'm good." I lied.

"Are you bored or something? Because we could go do something if you want. I mean, I don't know what we could go do, but…something. If you want. Or whatever." She said quickly, fleetingly embarrassed.

"Maybe. But you're right-what can we do? We can't go out, at least where there are people. And we just hunted this morning. Is there anything you had in mind?" I asked. She mulled it over for a minute, clearly trying to come up with something.

"We could go see the family." I looked back at her, shocked. When we left, the last thing she wanted to do was go back. Now she was suggesting it?

"I thought you didn't want to see them until you weren't a newborn anymore. What changed?"

"I _miss_ them. I didn't realize how hard it would be for me to not see them. But I won't go if Edward will be there. Lord knows I don't need that again."

"If you're serious, I'll call Carlisle. I'm sure we can work something out." I was happy at the thought-as much as it was hard for me to admit, I missed them too. Carlisle and Esme had been my 'parents' for so long that it was strange being without them. Bella nodded eagerly, and I took out my phone.

"_Jasper! What a pleasant surprise. How are you, son? And Bella?" _he asked, trying to conceal his happiness.

"We're good, Carlisle. Actually, Bella brought up a request today. She'd like to come and visit, but there is a…complication." I paused. I was sure Carlisle would get the hint and make sure he was alone before answering. Sure enough, I heard a door close on the other end.

"_I'm assuming that complication would be Edward?"_ He asked.

"You assume correct. Would it be possible to make some kind of arrangement?"

"_I won't ask him to leave. How would you both feel if we came to you?"_ I turned to Bella to see what she thought. Sure enough, she was listening, but she nodded in agreement.

"That would be fine. When can you be here?"

"_Everyone is home now, so we could probably leave shortly. And Jasper? What about Alice?"_ I thought about it for a minute. I waited for the echo of pain to surface; the one that always came when I thought about how much I missed Alice. But it didn't. I wouldn't let my mind make the connection on _why_ that was.

"If Alice wants to come, let her. I have no problem with that." Again, not going to wonder why that was. Bella was curious, but I'd bet money she wouldn't ask me about it.

"_Great. We'll see you soon. Esme will be excited."_ We hung up. A smile broke out on Bella's face-she was radiating joy.

"Happy now?" I asked. She nodded furiously.

"Esme will be here! I miss her so much! And Emmett! I'm just so glad to see them all!" I raised my eyebrows at her, but she was undeterred.

"Do you want to move back?" It was a legitimate question. If she was so happy to see them, wouldn't she want to go back home? I had to admit, the thought made my heart sink.

"What? No! Are you crazy? We got something good going on here-I'm not ready to move back. I'm allowed to miss them, though, right? Do you think they'll ask us to come home?"

"I don't think they would, Bella. They all know we'll come back when and if we're ready. Don't freak out." I told her, sending her a wave of calm before she got too excited. "I'm going to go and get changed-I doubt that it will take them long to get here."

And it didn't. They were there within a matter of hours. Emmett was the first person through the door. "Where's the bed, little bro?" he asked as his eyes scanned the cabin.

"For one, there is no bed. And secondly, technically you're _my_ little brother." I told him.

"Shouldn't there be a bed though?" he prodded as he wiggled his eyebrows. Bella felt a quick shot of panic-apparently the word spread to the rest of the family. I sighed.

"Enough, Emmett." I frowned at him. Rosalie was next, taking in the smallness of the place. She shrugged, but with a smile on her face. That was going to get some taking used to. Carlisle and Esme followed, beaming with pride and love. Bella ran straight into Esme's arms, where she was eagerly embraced. Carlisle patted her on the back while they hugged.

"It's a lovely place," Esme said once Bella released her. At this point, Bella was practically vibrating with delight. As I watched her, I felt a smile creep on my lips. Alice's breath ghosted on my ear.

"Remember what I said," she whispered, so low I almost couldn't hear it. I turned towards her to ask what she meant, but she fluttered past me and straight to Bella. "Are you feeling less crazy now?" she asked her. Bella was still uncomfortable around Alice-unsure as to how she should act. But Alice was having none of it.

"I do feel a little better, most of the time. But I still have trouble getting my thoughts together, and I still break things really easily." She replied. Alice laughed and pulled her into a hug. Her face lingered by Bella's ear a little long for my liking-she was telling her something I wasn't supposed to hear! Bella's eyes flickered to me quickly before turning back to Alice. She was playing some kind of game with us, and I didn't like it one bit. I tried to touch on what Bella was feeling for some kind of hint, but I got nothing from her. Oddly, that was happening more and more.

"So what have you two been doing lately?" Carlisle asked. Amusement filtered from Emmett as he stuck his hand up in the air.

"I know, I know!" he chimed in, acting like a fifth grader. Bella sprinted towards him, throwing herself at him and knocking him to the floor.

"Watch your mouth, brother! I'd hate to have to take you out," she giggled, hitting him playfully on the chest before standing up. He followed, and I could tell he was going to argue.

"Newborn, remember Emmett?" I gently reminded him. He looked like he was going to continue to protest, but he kept his mouth shut.

The rest of the evening went smoothly and quickly as we talked around the fireplace. Bella thought it would add to the atmosphere. She was genuinely happy the entire time-I couldn't stop myself from watching her. I wasn't much a part of the conversation, but that was usual when the family was together. It pleased me a little to see that I was no longer the object of anger, but had regressed to my traditional roll. I tried to figure out what Alice had meant. I ran the poem around in my head a few times and tried to connect it with something she had said to me. One line stuck out to me-_Worth the gamble._ I twirled it around in my head a few times. I looked up at Alice, trying to understand what she was telling me. She caught my eye and, very deliberately, looked at Bella.

_Worth the gamble._

Bella was worth the gamble.

_Choose right._

Was Bella what was right?

Oh my God.

Alice looked back at me and gave an imperceptible nod. I looked back at Bella, who was blissfully unaware of the realization I had just made. Alice knew this was going to happen. I stood up quickly and moved towards the back door. Alice followed without question, murmuring something about talking to me to the rest of the family. I felt curiosity, but no worry. As soon as we were out of hearing distance, I turned on her.

"How long did you know?" I asked. She took a breath.

"The moment she decided to take you with her when she left. I saw the two of you…getting cozy first, but then the future split. In one future, I saw you loving her and telling her so. I saw your life play out with her, and it was wonderful. You were happier than I've ever seen you! But in the other vision…not so much. Oh, you still loved her, but because you couldn't feel anything from her, you didn't tell her. You stayed with her for her newborn year, but then you both split up. Neither of you came back home-I don't know why. But what I did see was your eyes. Both of you had red eyes."

"So why did you see two futures? Does that happen often?" I was reeling.

"I have no idea. It's not unheard of, because you know my visions are fueled on the decisions people make. I think it was just showing me you had two options. But you should know that there's a reason you can't feel anything from her." My interest peaked at this revelation.

"What do you mean?"

"I _mean_, haven't you wondered if Bella is going to develop a power? Maybe you should ask her to show you how she feels." _What?_

"I don't understand." She sighed again, looking at me exasperatedly.

"Since Bella has been alone with you, she hasn't had a chance to figure this out. Ask her to put her hands on you; let her show you how you feel." I waited for her to continue. Now that she's opening up, I wanted to hear the whole truth. "You figure it out-I'm not going to walk you through it." She smiled. "It's only fitting, though-her power. She's so like you." I knew she wasn't going to say anymore on the subject, so we started back towards the house.

"What did Edward do when Carlisle said you guys were coming to visit?" I asked.

"Nothing. In fact, he's been doing a lot of nothing for the past three months. He's planning something, but I can't figure out what. I only get flickers. He's trying to keep me out, and it has me worried."

"But you'll see it when he makes up his mind, won't you?"

"I should. But that doesn't mean I can't worry about what he's planning. I'm pretty sure it's not going to be good." I wasn't going to let Edward's future plans ruin my evening though, so I didn't say anything further on the subject. I had a mission now, and I didn't like to be deterred. I felt Alice's amusement from my side.

"Will it work?" I asked, but she only shook her head.

**Normally, I wouldn't skip ahead in a story, missing three months and all. But, as much as I would love to write three months worth of cabin sex, I just thought it was time. And about Bella's power, I have one hint. One more taste.**


	19. Popcorn

**Disclaimer: All I own is a bunch of homework right now.**

***bows to Beta-goddess cullen818* whom, even after reading the chapter first, always reviews it anyway.**

**I'm sorry I'm becoming a little bit pokey-but the university started up yesterday, so I've added a 2 1/2 hour commute to my MWF. But I will post weekly, I promise.**

The family's visit was short but sweet. Carlisle had to work the following afternoon, and with Alice's unsettling warning they thought it was best to head home. When dawn broke the next day, Bella and I were alone again. I knew we both felt lighter-the room was bright with the happiness radiating from both of us. Currently, we were sitting adjacent from one another reading separate books. I decided to try Alice's words out on Bella and ask her to _show_ me how she felt.

"Bella? You up for trying something with me?" I asked as I sat my book down. She sat hers down to face me, smirking. I rolled my eyes. "Not like _that._"

"Hehe, whatever you say Jasper. What do you have in mind?"

"Alice brought an interesting idea out to me before she left. I mentioned that I had issues feeling things from you lately, and she suggested that you try and show me what you're feeling." She was frowning in confusion at my weak explanation.

"I don't get it."

"Put your hands on my face and try and show me how you feel." I suggested, moving closer to her. She hesitated, but before too long she moved towards me as well.

"Jasper, this is silly." She moaned, but while she was complaining I felt a distinct burst of frustration. It wasn't like I was siphoning it from her like I normally would; more like she was _pushing_ her emotions into me. It was puzzling and intriguing to say the least.

"There! Bella, you're frustrated! Do something else." I prompted.

"Don't tell me what to do, Jasper! This is the stupidest thing Alice has ever suggested!" she was pissed. It was the strangest thing; like she was just giving me her emotion rather than manipulating it, like I did. _Like I did._ She had empathic abilities!

"Bella! Don't you understand? You're showing me your emotions. I'm not reaching out and feeling them-it's like you're putting what you feel inside me!" I crowed, more excited than I should be.

"Seriously? Well alright then! I guess that's pretty cool. Hey-do you think it'll work the opposite way? Like I could feel what you're feeling without you showing me? I mean, it would probably work better with someone who wasn't an empath, but you can rein it in, right?" She bubbled, finally catching my mood.

"Let's try it! I'll make sure not to project. See if you can tell what I'm feeling." Bella's hands were still on my face as I concentrated on my inner joy. I made very sure to keep it to myself; I didn't want to influence Bella in any way. Her sharp intake of breath indicated that it had worked.

"Holy God, Jasper! You're wicked happy! And I just…I don't know, can tell! It's not like when you calm me down or anything like that-it's like I just feel it! This is so great!" Her hands were still on my face so her joy, combined with mine, made me feel almost euphoric.

"Go out with me, Bella." I blurted. My euphoria clearly depleted my verbal barrier to nothing. She dropped her hands from my face and stared at me, mouth agape. _Smooth, Jasper. _

"What?" she sat back down, stunned.

Might as well go full-hilt. "Go out with me. On a date." I waited for the rejection to wash over me. I didn't know what possessed me to do that. I was just so happy-it slipped.

"I can't leave the house." She stated, bringing up a good point.

"If you'll agree, I'll bring the date to you." I improvised, crossing my proverbial fingers.

"Okay." She whispered, so low I almost didn't hear her.

"Really?" I grinned. She nodded, but wouldn't meet my eyes. I leaned forward, placing my hand on her chin and tilted her face up. She finally looked at me. She looked embarrassed.

"Why, Jasper? Is it because we've been sleeping together? I told you from the beginning, it was a no strings attached deal. You don't have to take me on a pity date." She mumbled. I was taken aback by her reasoning.

"Bella, sugar? Look at me. Please." She reluctantly pulled her eyes to mine again. "I want to do this because…" I stumbled over what to tell her. "because I think I have feelings for you." I paused. Bella let out a huge breath, still staring at me. I just laid all my cards on the table, and now I was waiting for her to show.

"What now? Feelings? Like, feelings?"

"All I know is that when I'm around you, I feel different. I don't feel so…lost. I like watching you do the simplest things. I love the way you smell. These past few months have been some of the best of my existence." _So where was that hole I wanted to fall into again?_ I wasn't prepared to lay it out to her like this-in fact, if it had been anyone else, I probably wouldn't have. It was just, with Bella, I didn't feel like I had to hide anything. Like, if she could accept the things I had done in my past, she could accept anything without judgment.

"But…but…all those years with Alice?" she stumbled, trying to make sense of me.

"Please don't take that to mean that I didn't care about Alice! She changed my life. Without her, I don't know where I would have ended up. But with Alice and the Cullen's, I was always watched; untrustable. It was always the undercurrent of their feelings. But with you, I don't get that. Even after all that I've done to you. You forget that I'm an empath, Bella. I can feel that you trust me." I smiled.

"Oh." She replied, lost for words for the first time since her change.

"Bella? How do you feel about me?"

"I don't think it's fair that you ask me that right now, Jasper." She sighed, looking away. I couldn't help the frown that covered my face. "No! Don't look at me like that. I'm just saying it's hard for me to…sort through my feelings still. Everything just feels so powerful all the time. But I care about you, really I do. In these past months, you've become my best friend and then some. And I want to explore this," she gestured between the two of us, "because we definitely have chemistry. But if we're gonna build something, I want to build it slow. I want to make sure the feelings I have for you are genuine. Make sense?" she asked.

"Of course. Don't you think we're doing this backwards, though?" chuckling, I moved to pull her into my arms. "Shouldn't we have had this conversation first, and had sex later?"

"Well, we're nothing if not unconventional. We do things the way we want to-that's kind of the point." She grinned as she settled into my embrace. "So what kind of date are you going to bring me?"

"Well, little lady, that's for me to know and you to find out." I smirked as she hit my arm. Truth be told, I wasn't 100% sure what I was going to do, since I was flying by the seat of my pants.

"Can we have popcorn?"

"What? Bella, we don't eat food." Why in the world would she want popcorn?

"I _know_ that, silly, but wouldn't it be fun to try it?" I had forked down enough human food to keep up the façade for a lifetime; but Bella hadn't had the experience.

"You know it's gross, right?" She nodded. "But if you want it, you can have it. You just have to promise me one thing." She looked at me curiously, nodding. "I want to see your face." She laughed.

"Whatever you say, Jasper. I figure I need to break my 'human-food cherry' eventually-might as well let you get a laugh out of it." This time it was me who laughed. She really was something.

Edward's POV

I paced back and forth, back and forth, trying to come up with a plan without _actually _making anything definite. Easier to keep it from Alice, you see. You can't fool her; not usually. But I've done well so far. She has no idea. I can tell, from her thoughts, that she's suspicious, but she can't see anything beyond that. And that's what I want.

Because I won't let her interrupt me. Bella belongs to me, not him. And if _he_ thinks he can just come in and take her from me so easily, he's got another thing coming. I couldn't think the words out loud; the things that I wanted to do. Because if I thought them, she would see. I could hear them talking downstairs.

"_What did you see, Alice?" _Esme asked, excited.

"_Jasper told Bella how he felt. He asked her out on a date. Only, they're not actually_ going_ anywhere, considering Bella's still so new. So he's going to bring the date to her. He's not sure what to do yet; I think it was a split second decision to ask her. But I do see that he'll have to leave her alone for a few hours to get the stuff. I see it happening…in about two days. Oh, and Emmett? You'll love this. Bella wants popcorn."_ I heard Emmett guffaw loudly.

"_Man, I wish I could be there to see that. She has no idea how gross it is."_ I had stopped listening after this, because I heard the bit of information I needed to hear. I had an opening.

Back at the Cabin…

"Have you thought about what you want to do after your year is up?" I asked Bella as she sat in front of the mirror and braided her hair.

"Honestly? No. I can barely decide what to wear tomorrow, let alone what I'm going to do then. But I do know that I want to keep the family in my life. After their visit, I couldn't imagine not being close to them." She sighed.

"Do you feel like you're imprisoned here? I know it was your idea to leave, but I feel like I keep you locked up!" she chuckled at my wording, shaking her head as she turned to face me.

"Not at all. I _asked_ you to do this for me, remember? You take care of me without taking care of me, know what I mean? It's like we're on our own personal island here." I hadn't thought of it that way. I liked the thought of it-_our own personal island._

"We should take a trip when you have better control. Someplace far away, like Europe. Maybe, if you wanted to, we could make it a family thing. Like a celebration of sorts. What do you say?" I wanted to take her somewhere fun; somewhere I knew she wanted to go. A sharp pang of desire hit me, and I knew I hit the nail on the head.

"You mean it?" she squealed.

"Of course I mean it! I want to go. We could do like a backpacking thing-London, Ireland, and France? There's so much to see over there, and the weather's good for us a lot of the time. Hell-I wouldn't be surprised if Alice saw me ask. She's probably planning something already." I chuckled. I couldn't describe how glad I was that Alice and I had come to an understanding. Bella laughed, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"You're probably right. She's probably going to want to drag me down to every shopping district in Europe and make me try on a zillion outfits that cost way too much." She groaned.

"I'd say that's a fair guess. It's probably killing her not being able to take you out now. She's always thought of you as a sister, though, so you have to give her credit. She does the same thing with Rosalie and Esme, whenever they'll let her. The guys too! Why do you think we never wear anything twice?" I laughed.

"I know. Even after…everything, she still thinks of me that way?" she asked, questioningly.

"Yes, she does. I think Alice knows more than we give her credit for."

**Oh, Eddie, why must you be so thickheaded? **

**On a side note-Thanks to everybody who voted for my one-shot Breakfast in Bed in the STG's Rose contest-I won second place! woohoo! I'll put the banner up soon.**

**Also-Jasper's Darlin's are going to be putting up some reading rec's and a review up this week, so make sure to check that out. Link is on my page.**


	20. Trick

**Disclaimer: kitty is not Stephanie Meyer. **

**I'm really sorry this took me longer than normal. But I have good reason! Have you heard of the "For the Love of Jasper Contest?" Sure you have. I was working on a collab with BamaBabe (Long, Tall Texan) and I got kind of into it. Okay, a lot into it. It's on both of our profiles as well as the C2 for the contest, so go read and review! And make sure when October rolls around you go and vote for your fave! There's a plethora of wonderful Jazz fics up with every pairing imaginable-including Jasper/Charlie! so go! After you read this chapter.**

**Thank you, cullen818 for waiting patiently while I dabbled around for forever. (FYI, she's got a o/s in the contest too, and it's sw-eet)**

"Bella, remember what I said?" She glared at me from the corner chair as we went over the rules again.

"_Yes,_ Jasper. I must stay where I am and not leave the house. If I smell someone coming, I must call you immediately. If I get bored, call Emmett." She rolled her eyes while I nodded in approval.

"You know it's for your own good, sugar. I don't want anything bad to happen to you while I'm gone. I'll make this quick, I swear, but you've never been alone before." I couldn't help but worry. We haven't had the issue of a human getting this close, but knowing Bella's luck that day would be today. And, although the possibility was slight, I couldn't help but hear that annoying voice in the back of my mind that was ticking a certain phrase: _What about Edward?_ I got the feeling from the last time I saw him that he wasn't going to let this go. Add that to what Alice told me, and I couldn't help but be concerned. It would be just like him to try and sneak up here and scoop Bella away. But I trusted Alice; if she would have seen that, she would have told me.

"I know. It just sucks, that's all. Don't worry about me-I'm just going to read for a while. Hurry and go so you can come back." She smiled at me, looking disheartened. I'd be lying if I said it didn't make me happy to hear she felt that way. Without another word I bolted out the door and ran towards town. I was ridiculously excited about this little inside-date; I was practically skipping.

My first stop was the grocery store. Bella wanted popcorn, and although I knew she was going to despise it, I was going to get it for her anyway. Alice had seen that, of course, and called to tell me to make sure and grab a camera. Emmett wanted pictures. I got extra butter, smirking as I checked out.

Next, I went by the party supply store. I grabbed a slip-n-slide in the toy aisle. For some reason, it sounded like it would be right up Bella's alley. And considering we didn't get cold, why not create our own little summer paradise right here? I grabbed a few Tiki torches, coconut scented candles and tiny little drink umbrellas-I thought she would think they were cute. Clearly we wouldn't be putting them in anything drinkable to _us._ To cap of the evening, I grabbed a movie-some movie about a kid named Harry. _Here's to hoping I don't watch a minute,_ I thought. I grabbed a swimsuit for Bella-they only had one. It was an emerald green one-piece, which would probably suit her just fine.

I browsed around for a few more minutes before heading to the cashier to check out. The cashier couldn't help but look at me oddly-there probably wasn't a huge demand for said items this time of year. I just shrugged and looked down at my watch. I'd only been gone an hour. I hurried towards home anyway.

_Home._ It struck me that the cabin _was_ my home now. A home I didn't know I wanted. I was content before; I am _happy_ now. I was halfway back when I felt a surge of rage hit me from behind. I immediately tensed for attack, spinning around and crouching into a defensive position.

Edward.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him, not moving from my position. He circled around me, moving closer. I let out a low warning growl. I was wrong-he didn't go after Bella, he came after _me._

"She doesn't want you-not really. She just doesn't know it. You're controlling her with your _gift,_ aren't you?" he spat.

"Is that what this is about?" I snarled. "You don't even _know_ her anymore! And I can't control her, asshole! I can barely feel her emotions as it is!" That brought him up short.

"What?" he asked. It didn't escape me that he hadn't straightened up out of his crouch.

"Yeah-another thing you don't know. And I don't have the time to lecture you on all the things you _don't _know-I have a date." That did it.

He leapt at me, catching me around the neck bringing me down to the ground. I could feel his teeth sink into my neck before I was able to throw him off into a nearby tree. I was on my feet in seconds, hissing at both Edward and the pain in my neck. He moved to strike again, but I deflected him. "Just what do you intend to do here? Kill me? You think if you run to her with my head on a platter that she will take you back?" I snarled, throwing myself in his direction. He knew what I wanted to do, but I was so enraged that I had to act. "You think if you eliminate me she'll just run right back into your arms?"

"You're wrong on one count-I don't plan to kill you. I only want to incapacitate you until my backup arrives. What will Bella think when she finds out you've left her for another? And when I come to check on her, even though she sent me away, what will that tell her? That I love her more." He was feeling smug and in control.

"Backup? What backup?" And that's when I felt the first burst of real pain.

"Thanks for coming out on such short notice, Jane. I don't think you know how much I appreciate this."

"Your proposition was very difficult to pass up. Now tell me-how did you get around your sisters vision? I hear she is near infallible."

"It was easier than I thought. I figured out that it was possible to decide on two actions at once-at which Alice couldn't decide which one was real and which one was not. She thought that I was conflicted; that I hadn't made a decision yet. Even now, I'm fooling her. She shouldn't see this until you are well on your way."

Bella's POV

Three hours. He'd been gone for three hours. Something wasn't right, I just knew it. And I couldn't leave, but my God what was I going to do? I was thirty-three seconds from freaking out. Okay-I needed to think rationally. Can't leave…but I can call Emmett! He'll know something, I just know it. The phone only rang twice before he picked up.

"Hey, little sis, what's up?"

"Emmett, something's wrong. Jasper was only supposed to be gone for a little while, but it's been three hours and he hasn't come back. I don't know where he is, and he hasn't called, and he won't answer his phone. I can't leave to go look for him or I might eat someone! I'm scared." I told him in a rush. I was pacing the room, clenching and unclenching my fists. I was antsy. Most vampires, when nervous, get very still. Not me, oh no. I freak the hell out.

"Okay, chill out. I'm on my way. Do you know where he went?" he was business now, when dealings with his family were threatened.

"Into town, but I don't know where. I'm sure you'll pick up his trail if you come in from the direction of the house. Please hurry. Is Alice there?"

"Yeah. Here-I'm tossing you to her now. I'm gone." I heard the phone fly through the air and Alice's nimble fingers catch it.

"Bella. I heard everything. I'm coming to stay with you."

"Have you seen anything?"

"No. I've seen…several things, but none of them are concrete. And they all involve Edward, so I don't know what he's doing. I think he's just mad-coming up with ways to save the day, you know how he is-but no single decision has been made. I'll be there as soon as I can." The phone clicked shut. It wouldn't be soon enough-it would take her hours to get here. The town is closer, so Emmett will get there first, which was a comfort to me. But how was I supposed to sit here and wait? Not do anything? And would I _really_ hurt a human? If Jasper was in danger, I had to protect him. He would do the same for me. The rational voice in my head reminded me that Jasper wasn't a newborn vampire, but to hell with that. Emmett would be my backup.

Fuck it.

I was going, and I was going now. I could focus on this one thing, if it would save Jasper.

I steeled myself as I bolted out of the cabin and followed Jasper's scent towards town.

As I was running, the human scent grew more and more concentrated. My throat was on fire. It would be quick, if I made a little detour….Jasper. I have to find Jasper. I ran closer to town, holding my breath for most of the way. I would breathe in, very quickly, every so often to make sure I was on the same trail. I came out into a clearing that overlooked the town, and that's where the scent stopped. But it wasn't just his scent.

"Edward? Are you here?" I called, recognizing the scent that was purely his. I swear to_ God_ if he hurt Jasper I would dismember him right here and now and make him beg me to put him back together.

"Bella?" he responded, sounding very alarmed. "What are you doing this close to town? It's dangerous for you to be here."

"Don't you tell me what's dangerous, Edward! What did you do to Jasper?" I had inadvertently lowered myself into a crouch as he came out of the wood line.

"Easy! Emmett called me and told me he was missing. I was hunting in a nearby reserve, so I offered to come up and look around while he ran. I want to help find him." I glared at him suspiciously.

"And?" I prompted. He better make good on this.

"There is another vampire's scent here. One I don't recognize. And a vehicle nearby…"

"Okay, that doesn't make any sense. So you think Jasper was kidnapped by this 'phantom vampire'?" Who would want to kidnap Jasper? He hasn't done anything to anyone! He was only coming to buy me popcorn. This was my fault. "Who would want to hurt Jasper?" I sniffed. I wanted to cry. I wished I still could. He looked at me warily.

"I think there's something you should know." Oh great.

"And what would that be?" I snapped. I didn't want to hear any of his self-righteous bull shit. Not today.

"Last time I was near Jasper, his thoughts…were unsure." He paused. "I could see the hint of a thought of someone else, and how he was conflicted about her. He tried very hard to block me, and considering our last meeting, I didn't get any further into it. But I think…he may have run away with her." I froze. There was the stillness I lacked earlier. Jasper with another woman? But that didn't make any sense. Who would she be? And why?

"Why would he do that?" I asked, more to myself than to Edward.

"I know you didn't see this side of him, but Jasper's always had a sort of 'wandering fancy,' if you will. Alice was very lucky to have kept his attention for so long, but there were still others…" _What?_ Jasper cheated on Alice?

"She never said anything to me about that…" I whispered.

"She wouldn't want to upset you. It was something she dealt with by herself for the most part-she didn't like anyone else to know. Of course, the rest of us did-it's very hard to keep secrets in our home-but the problem was there." I just stared at him for a long moment, trying to understand. I thought we had something. "Did he tell you he had feelings for you, Bella?" Edward asked quietly, moving closer to me.

"Yes. Tonight was going to be our first date. He was in town to get the stuff." I was stiff; still frozen.

"I'm sorry, love. I wanted to tell you, but Alice made me promise. She said fate would take over-I think she was weighing in your favor. I'm so sorry."

I let him embrace me.

**Oh, I went there.**


	21. Search and Rescue

**Disclaimer-not mine! Yay Stephenie Meyer!**

**Many thanks to cullen818, my fantastic beta. PS-she's an official Darlin now! Woohoo!**

Bella's POV

Edward pulled me close while I tried to process everything he told me. But the pieces didn't make sense. I couldn't believe that Jasper would leave me, not like that. And I _wouldn't_ believe that he cheated on Alice. She was not the kind of woman you could hide that from. Nor was she the kind of woman to lay down and take it. I had no doubt that she would have ripped him limb from limb and danced around the pyre as he burned had he pulled a stunt like that.

"I'm here for you, Bella," Edward crooned, stroking my hair. Something was off. Not right. I tried to put this new-found gift of mine to work, pulling Edward's emotions to me while his hand brushed my cheek.

Smug.

That really pissed me off. It pissed me off because he had the nerve to feel smug right here in this moment with me. When he just broke my world, he told me he was sorry? But he wasn't? How many times before this? He had placated me in the past-how many times was he secretly happy? And it struck me that he didn't know about my gift. I was vibrating with anger; I still couldn't grasp my emotions in enough time to stop them from parachuting out of control. Those eyes of his I had lost myself in so many times were lying to me.

"How many times?" I asked, still cradled to his chest. He pulled back to look at me, frowning.

"I'm sorry? How many times what?"

"How many times have you lied to me like this?" I removed myself from his arms completely and glared at him, doing my best to fight my rage. Jasper was teaching me how-I tried to put his lessons to good use. But thinking of him sent another wave of panic through me.

"Bella, I know you're upset, but I'm not lying. I'm telling you the truth." Oh, the bullshit was practically radiating off of him. I wondered how I never noticed before.

"I know you're lying. I can feel how smug you are. You're keeping something from me-something about Jasper. What did you do to him?!" I cried, clenching my fists. I saw a grim realization come over him. About time. "Turns out I'm actually good at something, being a vampire. I've got a gift. And my gift is telling me that you're spouting bullshit."

"What kind of power, Bella?" he asked, still trying to be formal and polite. Oh, he's a fucker. Another attribute I got from Jasper-I cursed like a Texan.

"Well, I'm kind of like Jasper in a way. I can feel people's emotions-but only when they touch me. When you were stroking my face, I could tell you were happy about this. Smug. You did something to him, I know it. And I will find out, or I will kill you." I growled, giving up the control I had on my emotions. I was raw and ready to go. He was wisely backing away, but he was stupid to think he could outrun me. Before I could pounce and force the answers from him, I heard footsteps coming from behind. I wheeled around, but it was Emmett.

"What's going on here? Why are you in attack mode, little sis? Why does Edward look like he would wet himself if he could?" I was too tightly coiled to laugh, but I was glad he was there. He could hold Edward down while I beat him.

"This fucker knows something, and he won't tell me what. He's lying-he knows where Jasper is! He did something to him, Emmett! I know it!" I screeched. This was important-he had to understand. Edward was growing increasingly frustrated, but he made no move to disagree with me anymore. That was confirmation enough.

"Is this true?" Emmett moved closer to Edward, no doubt asking him in his head as well. He didn't respond.

That's it. I had officially breached pissed and entered the realm of bat-shit crazy. I would not wait for answers. I couldn't. I lunged, but Emmett caught me around the waist. "Chill, little bit! If you kill him, you won't get any answers out of him. So you should probably wait for Alice."

"If I wait, he will run." I grunted at Emmett, still trying to squirm from his grasp. Damn it, I was losing my strength. I could have taken his arm off when I first woke up. I was surprised that he hadn't tried to run yet, as a matter of fact. He was just standing there, dumbstruck as I struggled to gain access to his throat.

"What did you do?" Alice! She made it! Oh, I have never been so happy to see her.

"It doesn't matter what I did. He's gone, and you won't find him. One day you'll realize how bad he was for you, and you'll come back to me. I will _always_ love you more. Don't forget that." And then, finally, he took off. Emmett still had me by the waist, but Alice took off after him. It was no use-she wouldn't catch him. And Emmett wasn't going to let me kill him.

"Why won't you let me go?!" I cried, struggling harder.

"I can't let you kill him. We need him to figure out what happened."

"But he won't tell us! He's lost it! Alice won't catch him, and then he's going to disappear. He's figured out how to get around her, and Jasper's GONE. GONE, EMMETT! I have to find him." I was irrational. Emmett didn't loosen his grip, and before long we could hear Alice's footsteps making their way back.

"He got away, of course. I knew he was planning something, or at least thinking about it, damn it! Why didn't I move faster? No matter-I've seen a few possibilities we can work through. But we're going to need everybody-I'm going to call Carlisle and get him up here with Rose and Esme. Emmett, take her back to the cabin-we can't let her go after Edward."

"Stop talking about me like I'm not here!"

"Chill out, Bella. You have to get your head on straight if you want to find him. I know it's hard, and that you're pissed and crazy right now, but if you act irrationally then that lessens our chances. So please, calm down."

Calm. Okay. Right. Was she serious? In the back of my mind I knew I needed to calm down, but I couldn't. Fuck, fuck, fuck! I saw Alice whip out her cell and call Carlisle while Emmett carried me back to the cabin. I didn't fight, because I couldn't win (again, when I was brand new I could have kicked his giant ASS) and I wanted to get this going. I wanted to find Jasper. And then, when he was safe again, I was going to kill Edward. Oh, I would let him think I forgave him. Hell-I'd even invite him over for Christmas. And when he least expected it, maybe thirty years from now, I would destroy him for this.

"If I put you down, will you stay still?" Emmett asked. I thought briefly of running, but my rational mind was coming back and I knew that was a bad idea.

"Yes. I swear. I just want to find him." I was serious. Alice was my best bet right now. Edward may have confused her, but he couldn't completely stop her visions. She saw what he did; she just needed to sort through the farce. Carlisle would be the calm, rational one. He would know where to start. My family and I would find him. I had to believe that. Emmett finally sat me on the ground, and I kept my word. I sat on the floor and pulled my knees to my chest, and I found my stillness again. It wasn't long before Alice burst through the front door.

"The rest are on their way. Do you have something to write on, Bella? We're going to make a list of everything I've seen, and then we are going to work through each item on the list. Most of them are easily falsified, so we'll just start from the top. Don't freak out on me or I'll have Emmett hold you down. You have to trust us. We _will_ find him." She was so serious. I've never seen her so serious. It actually calmed me down a bit, knowing that I didn't have to be in control.

"I do. I trust you. Just…just find him." And when she looked me in the eye, we shared a thousand words. This was the man that she still loved, no matter what happened between them. No matter if they weren't together. She was as desperate as I.

"The others will be here in a matter of hours, but we're going to get started now. Bella-paper." I pointed numbly to the drawer by the couch, which she immediately dug through and pulled out the pad of paper we would play tic-tac-toe on. _Oh God._ She started scribbling. The list was too long.

"Alice, my God…" I cringed at the list…so many options…

"Tell me about it. Edward's been a busy boy." Emmett moved to her side and watched what she wrote as she continued her frantic writing. After what seemed like days, she finally stopped and turned the list to face me. "I have them listed in frequency of appearance-the visions I've seen the most of are at the top, meaning he's thought of them more often. Considering the time frame he had to work with, I put the most time-consuming options towards the bottom. So let's start from the top." All business. She was trying to be as objective as possible. I needed to be like her right now. I forced myself to look at the top of the list.

Maria.

I looked at Alice for an explanation.

"I see Edward calling Maria a lot to come and, ah, retrieve Jasper. She would most likely enjoy having him back to work for her-what Edward seems to forget is Jasper's free will. She is older than Jasper, but not stronger. She couldn't take him by force. But I still worry-she has many associates." She explained to me exactly _who_ Maria was to Jasper.

I balked. "So, what? You're going to call her up and ask if she's got Jasper in her evil little Latin clutches? How does that work?"

"Not quite. I happen to know that a friend of his, Peter, still roams the area from time to time. He would be very unhappy to see Jasper back with Maria-and he would also find it unlikely. If he is there, Peter will know." She whipped out her cell phone again and dialed rapidly. Was there some sort of vampire phone book I was missing? I heard an answer on the other line. Alice didn't bother with greetings.

"What is Maria doing, Peter? Has she left town?"

"_Why? What's happened?"_ Oh, the Southern accent was strong.

"Jasper's gone missing. We know foul play is involved-she may have something to do with it."

"_Let me make a call. I will call you right back."_ Click. Action! Yes! I stared at the phone in Alice's hand as if it was going to get up and walk away from me.

"Bella, I can feel your freak-out vibes from over here, and you can't even project. Be calm." At that point, her phone buzzed and I was lost again.

"_Maria has not left. As far as my associate can tell, there hasn't been a whisper of Jasper anywhere near her complex. Nobody of hers has left the area. I think you can rule her out."_ I sighed in relief and frustration. Thankful Maria didn't have him, frustrated because we weren't any closer to finding him.

"Thank you, Peter. I appreciate your help. If I find out anything, I'll let you know." She tossed the phone onto the couch and grabbed at the list.

"What's next?" Emmett was all business too. Alice glanced down and hesitated.

"Maybe we should wait for Carlisle for this one." _Oh, hell no._

"Why? What is it?" I was on red alert. It was bad. "It's bad isn't it, Alice? Really, really bad." She didn't disagree.

"Jane. He thought about Jane a lot." This name didn't mean anything to me. She saw my curiosity, and finally decided to proceed. "Jane works for the Volturi-you remember Carlisle telling you the story. She is part of their guard, and she has a very _intimidating _gift. Edward considered calling her and having her take Jasper to the Volturi. And she completely negates free will."

"What the _fuck_ does that mean? Alice, what the FUCK?"

"Jane could completely incapacitate any normal vampire-she cripples with pain. All she needs to do is look at you. If she could get at him, he would have no choice. He probably wouldn't even be aware he was being moved."

If I was scared before, I was terrified now. I couldn't stand the thought of Jasper in pain. I jumped up because I didn't know what else to do.

Alice ran to me and threw her arms around me. I didn't know if she was trying to calm me down, or if she was trying to calm herself down. Her body gave a little shudder, and I knew she was doing her best to keep herself together. But she was in pain too, and she wanted me to know that. I could feel the raw terror course through her veins. It wasn't tainted with anything else-it was pure, unadulterated terror. It mingled with mine; I was amazed how similar the feeling was. I wouldn't let myself wonder what it meant.

The doorknob turned, and Carlisle and the rest of the family entered. The somber state was unified as they filed in and joined us. I felt Esme wrap her arms around us, and Carlisle's hand was on my shoulder. We were all together, and it wasn't until this moment that I realized this was what I wanted. I wanted this family.

My family.

"We _will_ find him, Bella." The finality in Carlisle's tone was a lullaby for me.

"You have to call Aro, Carlisle. Ask him where Jane is." Alice pulled away, but her hand sought mine and we were united still.

* * *

**I have a few things here. First- I'd like to give a shout-out to Jasper's Dark Angel for turning me on to some sexy slash and whose nudging finally encouraged me to enter the technical world.**

**Go and follow the Darlins blog-we rec and review and we're fixing to do some sweet stuff here soon. links on my profile.**

**Two stories in the Love of Jasper contest-one by myself and one as a collab with BamaBabe (who, as you SHOULD know, is writing Long, Tall, Texan which is superfantastic and opened up the world of AH for me.) the contest is blowing up in a big way, so get on that. **

**I have twitter now- twitter/kitty_cullen and a yahoo ID (hence the technological world I'm a part of now) so you feel like a chat PM me and I'll give you my ID.**


	22. Snake in the Grass

**Disclaimer: kitty doesn't own Jasper! *sniff***

**Thanks to cullen818 for beta'ing this story-ya'll should head on over to her profile and read her stuff!**

Jasper's POV

It was like the change all over again. Every fiber of my being burned with a fire that I thought I had put behind me. I was faintly aware that I was being moved, but I had no sense of time. I was unable to concentrate. I screamed, because I had to do something or the fire would consume me completely. After hours, or years, or centuries, it finally stopped.

"Get up." A shrill voice demanded, but I was still too in shock to pay attention. "I said get up, or I will do it again." I tried to make sense of the words-_do it again_? Do _what_ again? A terrifying thought hit me-the pain. She would bring the pain back if I did not comply. I immediately jumped to my feet. "Good. And just to warn you, if you move to attack me, you will be killed." I took a moment to look around at my surroundings, taking inventory of her words at the same time.

I was in some kind of dungeon, it looked like-the walls were dark brick that looked ancient and there was no natural light. Underground, maybe? I looked towards my captor. She was a small thing, barely a woman when she was turned. Her hair hung to her chin, a light blond color, and her face was angelic. Or it would have been if she wasn't scowling.

"Where am I?" I asked. I knew better than to fight; at least not yet. Considering what she had done to me previously, I knew better than to take my chances.

"Volterra. I'm sure Carlisle has spoken of it." She said Carlisle's name with contempt, but her words spoke volumes to me. This was where Carlisle spent his early years.

These people were vampire royalty. I knew them well, considering my background. I had never been this close to them in person. I knew enough to be frightened. "Why did you bring me here? What did Edward offer you?"

"Your services in exchange for the girl. She may be a vampire now, but she is not invincible. Comply, and you will find out just how fragile she really is." I had heard them speak this one's name before-Jane. Alice said she had 'formidable gifts.' Of course. Edward wanted Bella for himself, and this was how he got me out of the way. He knew I would give myself up for her, and he could tell her whatever he wanted. But did he really think he could keep this from Alice? He may have now, but not forever-she'll see something eventually. I could _make _her see me, if I tried. I tried to make a decision that would catch her attention. I'm going to stay. I will do this for Bella.

"Done. If you can guarantee her safety, I will do what you want." _Please see this, Alice. Please._ It was then when I heard the chamber door that I hadn't noticed open.

Bella's POV

"Carlisle, do you think they have him?" I asked, unable to keep still. I was pacing-I had been for hours now. Carlisle had been filled in, and by the look on his face I could tell he was thinking. Hard.

"Based on what Alice has told me, I think it may be our best bet. But how to approach Aro is the problem-he's a prideful man, and revels in the fact that he is in charge. It will be difficult to get him to tell the truth. And then, I wonder what Edward has offered them in exchange."

"But what about the other alternative? What if Aro doesn't know, and Jane is acting on her own accord?" Alice asked. This was what I wanted-if Aro didn't know, perhaps he would be angry enough at Jane to punish her and give Jasper back.

"That would be ideal. He does not like being lied to. We would be very lucky if this was the case."

"Well what are we waiting for? Call him! Please, Carlisle, because I can't take this anymore. I can't stand not knowing if he's okay. I just can't." If he didn't call him, I would. I had to know. And we could go from there. If I had to go to Volterra myself to get him, then that's what I would do. Carlisle took in my expression and then nodded. He reached for his cell phone and dialed the number that would make my world.

"I need to speak to Aro. Tell him it's Carlisle." The room was tense as the seconds ticked by. Finally, we heard a voice on the other line.

"_Carlisle! How nice of you to call. How are things with your little family?"_ Carlisle's face was tense.

"Actually, Aro, that's why I'm calling. It seems that one of my sons has gone missing-we smelled one of yours in the area-Jane, maybe? Is he with you?" Polite, but to the point. So very Carlisle.

"_You must be speaking of Jasper. Yes, it seems that he's decided to work for me! I admit, I was quite surprised, but Jane said she made a very good case. Is this a problem?"_ So he was either playing with us, knowing full well that it wasn't okay, or he didn't know the circumstances of Jasper's arrival. I begged for the latter.

"It is, actually. My first son, Edward, seems to have had a little, ah, issue with Jasper in the recent past. We have reason to believe that Jasper was sent against his will." There was a pause on the other end of the line. He was either upset, or he knew about it and he was trying to think of a cover.

"_That _is_ a problem. A problem I'd be willing to discuss with you in person." _Son of a bitch! I saw Carlisle's face tense, thinking of a way out. I looked around the room, but nobody was looking at me. Everyone was watching Carlisle. Finally, I heard him sigh.

"Alright. I'll be on the next plane out."

"_Carlisle? I'd be delighted to meet the rest of your family as well._" Nobody missed the double meaning.

"Of course." And then the line went dead. Carlisle was somber as he put his phone back in his pocket. "I'm sorry, everyone, there doesn't seem to be another way. He's been waiting for an excuse to call us to Italy for some time now-this is the perfect opportunity. But I'm not sure what he expects. He wants something-but what?"

"I can take a guess." Alice said from where she was standing. She didn't look happy. "Aro's fondest dream is to have me on one side and Edward on the other. This will bring him one step closer." The room erupted in gasps and cries.

"NO, Alice. No. You can't go! He can't have you too!" I cried, unable to stop myself from launching forward. She smiled grimly and patted me on the back.

"We'll take it one step at a time." I waited; she looked like she had more to say. But then her eyes glazed over-the familiar face she made when a vision took over. Everyone waited-maybe this would be what we were waiting for. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally came back to us.

"What did you see?" Carlisle asked.

"Jasper. He's okay. He's decided to stay in Volterra…but I can tell he doesn't want to. It's got something to do with you, Bella-he's staying because of you. But I can't see much more than that."

"I bet that fucktard Edward promised Jasper in return for me. My safety-it's just like something he'd do. And of course Jasper would accept, the fool. But I'd bet money that he wanted you to see that, Alice. He knows we'll come for him." I knew I was right. I didn't know how I knew, but the feeling was so strong that there was just no other option.

"What are we waiting for? Let's go!" Emmett cried, ready as always for a good fight. This time, I was with him.

"He's right. We need to get moving. I don't want Jasper to have to stay there any longer than what he has to."

"I agree. I'll make the plane arrangements. Since this is Bella's house, I can't ask you to pack since you have nothing. We'll have to make due once we get there." I was already standing at the door as Carlisle pulled out his phone again. His voice almost wasn't slow enough as he made arrangements for us to take the red-eye to Italy. No stops.

Not fast enough.

It was then that I realized he wasn't just Jasper anymore, he was _my_ Jasper. And I wanted him back. All this talk of me being confused by my emotions was bullshit; I knew that now. What I was feeling was real, and deep, and scary. And I _would not_ lose him. Not over this.

"Alright. Let's go. I don't think I need to remind you how dangerous the Volturi are. Please try and keep a level head. Aro is very keen on negotiations; we may be able to talk him into relinquishing Jasper with no problems at all. We can't let this come to a fight." Carlisle's face was grim as he motioned us out the door.

Jasper's POV

"Jasper! I hope you find your accommodations satisfying."

I nodded stiffly at Aro, unable to manage any kind of formality with him. He looked to Jane, who had been "keeping me company" for the last several hours.

"Jane? I need a word with our newest member, please. Could you leave us?" The look on her face was priceless as she nodded and walked out of the room. When she was safely out of hearing range, Aro turned towards me. "I've just had an interesting phone call from a mutual friend of ours. Carlisle seems to think you've been taken against your will." _Thank you, Alice_!

"And?" I wanted to keep this as civil as possible. Maybe I could work my way out of this.

"I've asked them to come here, to discuss this." _Oh, no._

"There's no reason for them to come here-surely we can discuss this between us." I'd do anything from endangering the rest of them.

"It's too late for that-they're already on their way. I was under the impression that Alice was your mate-why wasn't it her begging on your behalf?" He was changing the subject-smooth.

"Alice and I are no longer together. Things were not well between us for some time; it was for the best. We remain very close."

"I see. So she is not…with anyone else? She has no ties to that place?" _That place? _I realized with a sick drop of my stomach what he wanted.

What he's always wanted.

"She won't join you, Aro. She has no desire for this life." I tried to be as polite as possible, but my fuse was already at its end. I wouldn't let him have any of my family. If I could just call them and tell them to stay…

"Ahh, Jasper, you underestimate her, I think. If it comes down between the two of you, I would place a bet that she would offer herself. And I'm so eager to meet Bella, as well." He knew. He knew everything.

"Why, Aro? Why not leave us in peace? We've done nothing-harmed no one!" I growled, anger finally bubbling over.

"I seek the powerful-the gifted. Our kind needs a system of justice, and that is the best way for us to accomplish that. I use whatever means necessary to acquire what I want. This way is peaceful-no harm."

"No harm? You're breaking up my family!" and I knew they were my family-any doubts I had were gone. I wanted to be a part of them. I wanted Bella and I to be a part of them.

Assuming I could get us out of this mess.

"My only concern is my family. But alas, yours will be arriving some time tomorrow, so I would get ready if I were you. Jane can take you out hunting, if you like. Our way, of course. And I would strongly suggest you think about what will happen when they arrive."

I couldn't hunt. Not humans. I would be okay…

"And before you argue the hunting issue, I'm not asking. I won't have you a danger to the city." With that he stormed out of the room.

I was backed into a corner.

"Let's go." Jane beckoned from the still open door.

**I'd like to tell you all about a contest Jasper's Darlins are hosting: Home for the Holidays. A winter holiday, Jasper-centric o/s contest. Details can be found at: http://jaspersdarlins(dot)blogspot(dot)com**


	23. Switch

**Disclaimer: Not kittys!**

**A couple things: The Darlins are hosting a Jasper-centric holiday o/s contest. You know you want to enter. Hit up my profile for details. **

**I'm also up for bid with the fandom gives back auction. Myself and MaitresseSaint will be offering a o/s. Jasper, any way you want him. Bidding would be nice. :P **

**Many thanks to cullen818, my wonderful, super-fast beta. I don't know if she noticed, but this chapter was influenced by her Fate/Hope/Love series. Haven't read? Go now.**

Bella's POV

I was freaking out. Grade A, class act, 100% freaking the hell out. I was on a plane full of humans. I was too new for this. Every single one of them smelled so good. _So good._ My hands were shaking at my sides; my whole body was tensed to spring. Carlisle sat on one side of me while Emmett took the other. They both had an arm clamped down on me. The room was circulating nothing but the rich deliciousness that was their blood. All of it-I wanted all of it. I started to jerk my hands away, but the two men were unrelenting. Carlisle leaned towards me.

"You have to remember Jasper. Be strong for him. Have faith in yourself." He whispered, too low for anyone else to hear.

Jasper. Yes. I could fight this, just a little bit longer, as long as I got to see Jasper. But I couldn't get my body to relax. I was practically drooling venom, and if my muscles had the ability to ache, they would be by now. I bit down on my lip.

"Bells, as much as I'd love to give you hell for taking out an entire plane full of people, that might hinder us a little bit on our rescue mission. You gotta calm down." This time it was Emmett trying to break my concentration. How could he sit there, calm as you like, while they just waited for us to take them? Alice could sense my distress; she had found her way to the seat behind me.

"If you love him, you'll stay where you are." These words, more than any others, calmed me fractionally. I didn't turn around since Carlisle and Emmett still had a hold of me, but I could feel her eyes boring into the back of my head. I nodded, sure that she saw me. Sure enough, I heard her relax back into the seat.

"_Attention, passengers, we'll be arriving in Rome in five minutes. Please fasten your seatbelts."_ The captain's voice came over the intercom, giving me a timeline to salvation. A ghost of a smile crossed Carlisle's face. I couldn't fathom what had brought it there. He noticed my incredulous look, and the smile widened.

"I'm very proud of you, Bella. That's why I'm smiling. And Jasper will be proud of you too." I wanted to cry as he looked at me like I was something special.

After an eternal five minutes, I felt the plane begin to descend.

"Don't be surprised if they've sent someone to meet us at the airport," Carlisle warned, as we moved to get off the plane. I couldn't suppress the small growl that bloomed in my chest at the thought of one of _them_. They had Jasper. As far as I was concerned, they'll all pay for this.

Sure enough, a man in a black cloak was waiting for us at the gates. His eyes were a dull violet color-as if red was mixed with brown.

"Come with me." Well, I'm glad he's so friendly.

The ride to the castle was quick. Our companion didn't say anything to us, not even upon arrival. He merely motioned for us to follow him through a set of passageways that seemed to go on forever. I heard a small gasp from behind me; I turned quickly and noticed Alice had come to a standstill. I knew immediately what was happening, but there was no time to ask. Within moments, her face had smoothed out and she was walking again. Something was wrong with her expression.

At long last, a pair of enormous doors was opened and we entered a cavernous chamber. My eyes searched hungrily for Jasper, but he was nowhere to be found. My eyes instead rested upon a man with dark hair that fell like a curtain around his brittle white skin.

"Carlisle! I'm so very glad you made it. And with a newborn in tow!" He turned his attentions to me. "You must be Bella. I'm sure the plane ride was painful. It must have taken a great deal of strength to resist." He smiled sickly at me, as if we were old friends. I narrowed my eyes, prepared to tell him where to go, when Carlisle gently pinched my arm.

"Aro. Thank you for the escort." Carlisle nodded amenably.

"Where's Jasper?" I blurted, unable to keep it in. Aro only smiled at me.

"I can see the feelings are mutual between you two. Jasper is being guarded right now-we had a bit of an incident while he was hunting." My stomach fell through the floor. _Please tell me Jasper didn't feed on a human, it will destroy him!_

"Incident?" Carlisle asked.

"I requested that he hunt with Jane, but upon leaving the castle he created a small uproar. We had to take him down and lock him away. No harm was done." Okay, that's it. I was 3.4 seconds away from going bat-shit crazy on this guy, and time was up. I growled, lowering myself into a crouch. Before I had time to register what happened, I was surrounded.

"Gentlemen, please-she's very young. I'm sure she had no intentions of doing me harm." _Think again._ He was trying to tell me if I made a move, I was toast. This was my final warning. The men backed away, and I was left glaring at Aro. "Bella, do you know about my gift?" Carlisle said something about it, but my mind was too far gone to remember. I just shook my head. "I have a talent very similar to Edward's," I cringed at the name, "only I have to have physical contact in order to do so. But I can also see every thought the mind has ever had." I balked. I'd just thought about killing him not 5 minutes ago-what would he think when he saw that in my head?

"Aro, if I may?" Carlisle interceded. Aro waved him on. "Edward was never able to read Bella's mind-human or vampire. I wouldn't be surprised if you can't either." _Oh, please be right!_

"Bella, if I may?" he approached cautiously with his hand held out. I reached forward, not sure what he wanted me to do. He placed his hand in mind, and I waited.

His face was concentrated at first, and then it crumpled into frustration. He pulled away, looking puzzled. "It seems you're right, Carlisle. I see nothing from her. How very curious…" he was eyeing me speculatively now, and I didn't like it.

"I'd very much like to see Jasper, Aro. And then we can discuss what needs to be done to bring him home." Aro paused for a moment, and then turned towards the guards and nodded. A few minutes later, I heard a door open.

"Bella…" Jasper breathed, and I relaxed completely at the sound of his voice. My eyes sought his, and I couldn't help but smile. He was okay. _Thank God._

"Oh, _God_, Jasper, I was so worried! I love you so much-I never say it, but I do. I love you more than I thought possible, and I-" Aro's chuckle cut me off.

"Ahh, love is in the air. Felix, let Jasper go so that he can have a proper reunion while Carlisle and I discuss the terms of his release. Alice, love, you might want to come along for this."

Everything clicked into place then.

What Alice saw.

He wanted her in exchange for Jasper. He must have known it as well, because he turned towards Alice and beseeched her with his eyes. "Alice, I'm not worth it. There's got to be another way." He spoke only to her, and I let them have this moment. Right now, as they looked at each other, all of their history was laid out and all of their feelings were one.

Finally, Alice smiled. "That's where you're wrong, Jasper. You _are _worth it._" _She turned away and followed Aro through the chamber doors. He watched the doors shut, and then turned to me. So quickly I didn't see it coming, I was in his arms.

"Oh, Bella. I'm so…" he just shook his head, unable to finish. And then with fierceness only he could possess, he kissed me. Never in all of our time together had he kissed me like this. It was full of meaning, and desire, and truth…it was as if I was human again, as my fingers clenched and my toes curled. I wrapped myself around him, not caring that some of the family was standing there. He was feeling nothing but love. I clung to him like nothing else. I kissed him back until I heard Emmett chuckle in the background. "I was caught off-guard. I shouldn't have been, but I had my mind on other things. And it was Edward-I never would have thought he'd do something like that. Please, sugar, please tell me you didn't believe him. Whatever he told you, it wasn't true."

"I don't think I ever believed him. I was shocked, and confused, but when I let him hug me, he was so smug. I just knew that he had something to do with it. And then he tried to tell me you cheated on Alice, and that you would do the same to me. It didn't make sense. Alice came, and he knew the jig was up. He took off, but Emmett wouldn't let me go after him." Another chuckle from behind me. Jasper smiled. I felt like I hadn't seen him smile in years.

"I love you, Bella. Truly, I do. It's taken me this long to realize that all I want is you. And my family, of course." He turned to smile at Esme. It looked like she had been waiting for a trigger, because she was at his side in an instant.

"I'm so glad you're okay." She said, stroking his face with her thumb. It was so motherly and tender.

"Thanks for coming to get me. Although I'm worried about what price we'll have to pay for my freedom." He frowned towards the door. "He wants Alice. And Edward too, eventually. And I'm afraid he's got his eye on you now, Bella. The way he looked at you when he couldn't read your mind…it was…disconcerting."

"I saw that too. Well I've got news for him. It's not going to happen." Just then, the chamber doors opened. Aro walked through first, followed by Carlisle and Alice.

"I'm staying." Alice stated. I opened my mouth to object, but she raised her hand to stop me. "Before anyone argues, this is for the best. I can keep my lifestyle, and I won't be confined to the castle. Jasper leaves with the rest of you. Don't complain. What's done is done." She said. Esme walked up to her.

"For how long?" she said, sadness in her eyes.

"Five years. And then I can choose to stay or go. It's not bad, I promise. And I _want_ to." She hugged Esme and Carlisle before walking towards Jasper and myself. She turned to me first. "Bella. My sister. I love you, and I always will. He is perfect for you. It's your turn to love him-do it right." I nodded, dry sobbing into her chest. I pulled her close to me and made sure she knew exactly how much I loved her. She felt no regret.

"I love you Alice. Come back to us soon." She turned to Jasper next.

"You're still my soldier, you know that? I love you. Please take care of her for me. You're made for each other-I only lead you to her." She placed a tender kiss on his lips-a farewell to arms-before hugging him fiercely.

"Alice. My Alice. You gave me life." He hugged her again, quickly, before turning away. I knew he'd be crying if he could. I reached for his hand, letting my fingers weave through his as Alice said her goodbyes to Rosalie and Emmett. I didn't hear what she said to them. And then she was moving back towards Aro, and he was handing her a black cloak. The triumph in his eyes was undeniable.

"You're free to go, Jasper. Carlisle, so nice to finally meet your family. I hope you charter a private plane back, for Bella's sake. And Bella-I hope to see you soon." _Not on your life._ We turned without hesitation and went back the way we came, stopping in the lobby so that Carlisle could make flight reservations. I was thankful that he took Aro's advice and chartered a private jet-normally I'd be against such frivolous spending, but I didn't know if could handle another passenger flight.

"You want to know the first thing I'm doing once we get home?" Jasper asked as we waited for the plane.

"You mean besides showing me how much you missed me?" I teased.

"Of course, sugar."

"Then no, I don't."

"I'm going to find Edward."

**Aren't we all glad that Jasper's been rescued? Now we just have to deal with Edward. And some fine J/B lovin! This story is coming to a close guys-not much left. So enjoy while you can, and leave me some love!**


	24. Up Against a Wall

**A couple things: Normally, I don't apologize for delays, but this time I will. It's been longer than normal, but sometimes I just gotta put other things first. I got busy with the fandom gives back auction, and doing some RL stuff as well. **

**this is also un-beta'd. My wonderful beta, cullen818, I give you my profuse apologies for not sending this your way first.**

**This is also a little brief, but I didn't want to cram a lot into it, since we are coming closer to the end. We've only got a little more to go!**

The plane ride home was quick. Bella was at ease; not having to worry about slaughtering a plane full of people was a huge relief to her. I couldn't believe she managed in the first place. "How did you do it?" I asked, realizing she hadn't heard the question in my head. She turned to me and frowned.

"Do what?"

"Not kill an entire plane full of people. It had to be incredibly tempting for you."

"Emmett and Carlisle held me down. It sucked. Well, not literally, but you know what I mean." I laughed at her explanation.

"Good for them. I'm proud of you for it, Bella. I can't imagine the pain…" I trailed off.

"Carlisle said you'd be proud. And the pain of my throat didn't compare to the pain of losing you. I was scared half to death. Second death. Whatever. It really…it was bad." She was serious now, staring into my eyes as her hands played with my hair. If she only knew.

"It was no cake walk on my end, I assure you. I was afraid you were going to believe him. I worried that you wouldn't bother coming to look for me."

"Edward was smug while he held me. I knew that wasn't normal. I pieced it together, and Alice helped us figure out the rest. I would have come for you no matter what." Her lips were pulled into a frown, and she was sad. I knew she must be thinking of Alice and her sacrifice.

"Alice will be fine. Aro holds her on a pedestal; he won't let anything happen to her. She'll come back to us when her time is up." She nodded, but she was still looking dejected. I pulled her to me and held her for the rest of the flight. I couldn't wait to be home. _Our_ home. I looked at the faces of my family, who seemed lost in their own thoughts. The feelings in the cabin were mixed; sadness for Alice, happiness-I assumed at my retrieval, anger. I could only guess the anger was directed at Edward. He would get his. The inklings of a plan were tickling the corners of my mind. It would come into place, but first I wanted to get home.

Once the flight landed, we made the forever drive to the cabin. The family hesitated, not going in. I looked at them, questioning, but it was Emmett who answered.

"Boy, I sure am hungry. How about we go for a hunt?" he winked at me. Bella rolled her eyes. "Someone's gotta hang out here, though, to make sure nobody broke in. I know! Jasper, Bella? Why don't you guys hang back?" now he was full on grinning. Carlisle chuckled, but nodded his head in agreement.

"We'll let you two get…reacquainted. We'll be back later." The family took off, and Bella and I were finally alone. Bella walked towards me, shaking her head. Her feelings contradicted her nonchalance. She grabbed my hand and all but yanked me into the house. Her lust was my lust and before I knew what was happening her lips were on mine. I eagerly reciprocated, tangling my fingers in her hair as I kicked the door shut behind me. Before I could pull her onto the couch, she stood back.

"Jasper? I want you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"All this time that we've been here, it's always been about what I want. Even when we were…together before-that was because I needed an outlet. But I love you, and you love me, so right now, I want it to be about what you want. I want you to _show_ me how much you want me." She was almost growling by the time she finished, her voice an octave lower. I studied her a moment before completely throwing my senses out the window. I picked her up, tossing her over my shoulder and running to the back of the house. I flipped her over, wrapped her legs around my waist and ripped her shirt to shreds.

"Yes…" she hissed as I did the same to her pants. She made a motion to do the same to me, but I stopped her.

"Stop." I commanded. Her eyes darkened, but she pulled her hand back. I ripped a slit up the front of my shirt, but let it hang open. I pressed her against the wall and unbuttoned my pants as I went. I snapped her bra off and let my mouth wander to meet her perky breasts. She arched to meet my mouth, but I held her down. "Don't move until I tell you to," I hissed, nipping her lightly on the neck. I pulled her dark, blue silk panties down to where I could yank them away. I was quickly becoming eager, but the venue wasn't right. I didn't want to take her _this_ way up against a wall! While I was searching for someplace better, Bella let out a little purr of anticipation.

And then it didn't matter anymore.

I licked my way down the valley of her breasts while my hand felt for the tender place between her legs. She was already thrusting against me, desperate for friction. I yanked my boxers off without even bothering to step out of them. My fingers moved against her as my mouth couldn't get enough of her breasts. She was whining, but she hadn't spoken against me again.

"Do you see how I want you, Bella? Only you can do this to me. _Only. You._" I thrust into her quickly easing both of our wants. There was no slow and steady. Only a frantic fervor. She met me thrust for thrust while her hands gripped my hair for support. A low keening was rumbling from her throat as my fingers made quick circles over her clit. I lifted her from behind so that she was more angular-that was what she needed. With one more push she was tumbling over the edge. The feel of her clenched around me and the pure, unadulterated love that was pouring from her was enough to let me join her quickly. I came hard. She lifted her head to look at me and the smile that grew from her lips was almost enough to make me come again.

"I love you, Jasper. I really do. I don't know how it happened. It probably shouldn't have happened. But you know what? I'm glad it did." I sat her down and she headed to the closet to find something to wear. I let her dress before I pulled her into my lap.

"I love you Bella. More than I thought I was capable of. We should talk about what's next."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean do you want to stay here, in the cabin together, or do you want to go back to the family? I know you love them-if you want to go back, we can. I love them too." She smiled at me.

"I think that I'd like to stay with you for just a little while longer. But I think I _would_ like to go back with them." This time, I smiled at her.

"I'm glad. It feels…right, being with them. But it feels better being with you." I was dangerously close to crossing a line with her. I had forever with Bella, that was certain. But Bella Whitlock would sound much better than Bella Cullen.

"I'm glad you think so. Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, anything at all." I was sidetracked for the moment.

"What are you planning on doing to Edward?" This brought me up short.

"I honestly don't know. I'll need to speak to Carlisle first, I'm sure he has some advice for me. I might need to take Emmett with me, as well." She was curious about this. "Because if I don't, I'm afraid I won't be able to stop myself from killing him."

"Oh." She thought for a moment. "Can I make a suggestion? Back in Italy, you said that Aro wanted Alice _and_ Edward. What if we could, I don't know, bring Edward to Aro?" She had a valid point. But how?

"And how do you plan on doing that?" She was feeling quite devious, so I assumed that she had a plan. She let out a breath.

"I was thinking that, well, maybe I could call him-see if he'd be willing to meet me. I could tell him that I changed my mind, and I wanted to be with him. He's so far gone he'd believe it. I could convince him to take me to Italy to thank Aro, and then…I don't know, they could attack him or something." It was a plan. And a decent plan at that. But I saw one flaw.

"Bella, that means that none of us can be within hearing distance of him. He'd pick the plan out of our heads. I don't know about that." She turned to glare at me.

"I can handle myself. I'm pretty sure I'm stronger than him, if things get out of hand, but they won't! He can't read my mind-it would be perfect. We could alert a member of the guard-they could hang back and he wouldn't have the chance to escape. Maybe if we do this, Aro will let Alice go early." She was trying not to let the hope shine through, but I could feel it.

"I'm not comfortable with the idea of you taking him alone, but the plan has merit. Let's run it by everyone else when they get back, and see what they think."


	25. No Matter What

**Okay guys, this is it. I hope you enjoyed this, and I hope I end this well for you. I will no doubt have a long-winded AN at the bottom as well.**

**Thanks, cullen818, for catching my errors and being my sounding board throught this whole process. You rule!**

Bella's POV

"Bella, I'm not so sure this is a good idea," Carlisle said, frowning. Nobody thought this was a good idea but me.

"At least you're all in agreement," I said as I rolled my eyes. "This is the perfect plan!! At the very least, I won't have to worry about Edward anymore. And, if we're really lucky, Aro will let Alice come home early!" How could they _not_ see this? "I'm stronger than he is," I threw in.

"Yes, but Edward is a skilled fighter. You can overpower him, but he outweighs you in skill." Jasper said. Way to be supportive.

"I'm not saying that I don't agree, but I can hold my own. If we can keep this from him until we get to Italy, it'll be a done deal." I shrugged.

"If, Bella. _If_ you can get Edward to Italy. _If_ he doesn't suspect anything." Jasper was growling now, growing increasingly frustrated at my lack of fear. Tension was rolling off him in waves and he was very unhappy.

"I'm doing it. Listen-I'm not going to live out the rest of my existence worried if he's going to try and come steal somebody else I love away. I'm going to call Jane as well. I'll tell her to keep to the shadows, stay away for a bit. I'll send her a message when I'm ready for her. She can…incapacitate him and they can take him away."

"Do you think he'll stay? It's Edward-why wouldn't he fight?" I couldn't answer Esme's question.

"I don't know. But the Volturi guard will surely slow him down, if anything. And Alice…she may be able to convince him to stay. I've got to try." I tried to say this in a tone of finality, but I don't think anyone bought it. Jasper was in the corner, glaring at me with worry and anger etched on his face. I was sure that the anger was only in response to the fear he was feeling, but I still didn't like it. I scowled back at him. I felt like a pouty child. He walked up to me, his expression softening.

"Bella. If he hurt you…" he didn't finish.

"He won't. I'll play it cool until we get to Italy, and then I'll have backup. It'll be fine. I'll call you as soon as it's over." He took in a deep breath. I placed my hands on his face and pulled him in for a kiss. I tried to let this be a normal kiss; I didn't want him to think it was goodbye. But he had other ideas. He wound his hands in my hair, kissing me so fiercely that I was afraid he would consume me completely. This time, I pushed him away. "I _will_ come back to you." I told him. He didn't look so sure.

I made my arrangements with Jane-she was very receptive to the whole idea. It made my skin crawl, talking to her, but there was no other choice. It had to be her; she was the only one who could take Edward down as quickly as I needed her to. I was going to send her a text message (_and my mind did not let it escape me how odd it was for her to have one) _when I wanted her to appear. She was going to stay out of range until then, so that he didn't hear her coming. Nobody else was to know. Now, I had to call Edward.

"What makes you think he's even still _using _his cell phone? I mean, if it was me I would have ditched it long before," Rosalie said. This time, I had an answer.

"Because he's waiting for me. He's delusional enough to think that I _will_ come back to him; therefore, I bet money he's still walking around with it in his pocket." I said smugly. Emmett's eyes perked up at the word 'bet,' but Jasper quelled any thoughts he must have had with a single look. I took a deep breath. "Don't say a word. Don't breathe. Don't move." I commanded as I dialed his number.

"_Bella." _My skin crawled at the sound of his voice. How far I had come!

"Edward! I'm so glad I found you. Listen…I have something to tell you." I paused, but he didn't interrupt so I went on. "I…I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for the way I've acted towards you! You were right. You were always right." I heard a gasp. _Please believe me, please believe me…_

"_Oh, thank God! I knew you'd come around, I just knew it! I was always the only one for you, Bella."_ Yes!

"I know it. Listen…can we go away together for a while? I need to get away from all of this. Away from Jasper." I saw his fists clench at the words.

"_Of course, my love. But first-what changed your mind? You were so sure of your path when I saw you last."_

"I think he was controlling my emotions. When he was gone, I felt…normal again. I hadn't been alone since I was turned; I don't think I ever got a chance to feel my own emotions." It felt like sin was rolling off my tongue. I felt dirty.

"_Of course he was. That's what he does-it's in his nature. Why do you think the family didn't ask him to leave sooner? Every time he would slip, he would make us feel compassionate for him. I'm so glad you've come around. Now tell me; when can I see you?"_ Okay. I can do this.

"Now. I can meet you now. Just tell me where you are, and stay away from humans."

"_Whatever you like."_ He gave me directions to where he would be, and I hung up. Jasper was so angry I was afraid he was going to change his mind and tell me I couldn't go. I leaned down to kiss him on the cheek.

"You know every single word I said was a lie, right?" he nodded, but wouldn't meet my gaze. "Jasper. I'm doing this for us."

"I know. But I _hate_ it. I hate that you'll be with him, pretending, and I can't be anywhere near you. I'm scared, and I don't want you to go." I hugged him tightly.

"I'll be back before you know it. Now I have to get going-I'm going to grab a change of clothes that Alice bought me so he doesn't smell you, go for a quick hunt, and run through the river. I need to get as much of you off me as possible." I took one last look at the family. They were so worried . "I love you. All of you. And I will be back soon." I couldn't let this be a goodbye scene. I turned and fled.

After I successfully removed any traces of Jasper, I ran to meet Edward. He was waiting for me, and the smile on his face was angelic. He came close to me and embraced me. "Oh, Bella, I've miss you so much." He hugged me close. I had to learn to act, and I had to learn fast. I let my arms wrap around his neck and I pulled him close to me.

"I'm sorry, Edward. Can you forgive me?" he chuckled into my hair.

"There's nothing to forgive. So tell me, where is it that you'd like to go? I take it you have someplace in mind."

"Italy. I think, if it's okay with you. And hell-all of Europe while we're there." He quirked his eyebrows at me, but didn't say anything about my odd choice.

"Anything you'd like." And it was like we hadn't been apart. Like he hadn't done all of those bad things. How could he ever forget? And all he was feeling was love. He chartered us a plane, and before I had time to really think about this, we were ready to go.

"That was…fast." I said, and he laughed.

"I'm just as eager to leave this place as you are." He pulled my hand and tugged me towards the car. I was trying, very hard, to act casual. To act as though this was normal. Thank God I wasn't able to blush anymore. We were leaving with no bags. "We'll get what we need when we arrive," he said, as we pulled up to the airport. I could smell humans; Edward noticed my tension. "Don't worry, it's only the pilot. He'll be the only one on the plane." I nodded, but held my breath.

Once we were on the plane, it was noticeably easier. He was locked away in the cockpit, and it was like the ride home from Italy. I was fine. Edward made small talk. I was thankful he didn't ask what happened after he ran away. But a part of me worried why. We talked through the long flight. Never once did I relax. I was becoming increasingly terrified, as a matter of fact. Being so far away from my family frightened me. But I was so close-I could do this. For Jasper.

Our flight landed in a small, remote airport. He really had planned this out. "I'd like to take you somewhere first, if that's alright. And then we can go wherever you'd like." I nodded. He got into the rental car, a Porsche, and we drove away. It felt like hours before we reached our destination; I worried that this would throw my time schedule. Finally, he pulled to a stop in front of what looked like a vineyard.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked. I couldn't see a reason. It made me nervous.

"I have something I want to ask you. I wanted to take you to someplace beautiful. What's more beautiful than a vineyard in Italy?" Uh oh. "When…you were turned, I thought of many things. I thought that, finally, we could be together and I wouldn't be a danger to you. And I thought that it would be what you wanted as well. And then things changed. Of course, I always knew that Jasper was manipulating you; that you couldn't possibly want him, when he had done such a horrible thing to you. So I waited. You know the rest. I always knew that you would come back to me. Now, I want to make it permanent." Of course he did. And, in true Edward fashion, he got down on one knee. Well, if I was going to screw him over, I might as well go all out. "Bella-be my wife. I love you."

"Of course Edward." I was getting so good at lying now it was almost ridiculous. _Yes, Edward, of course I'll marry you! Now let's go visit the Volturi-I think Jane has something for you._ He grinned, and it was so easy to see the man that he used to be. He hugged me and I was enveloped in his love. His true happiness. At least now I know the truth about him.

"I'm going to make you the happiest woman in the world, do you know that?" he said, shining. I faked a smile.

"I know you will." And it was completely true.

"Now the rest of the day is all for you-what would you like to do now?" _Time to act._

"Can we go to…Volterra?" I asked, trying to play coy. He looked confused. "It's just that, I've heard so much about it, and I want to see it."

"If you'd like. Tell me, Bella-what happened after I left that day we fought?" _we fought? A bit of an understatement, don't you think?_ I started walking; hopefully I could get this story out just as we got near the city.

"Naturally, Alice jumped into action. She was trying to figure out what you'd done; where you sent him. She called the rest of the family, and Carlisle spoke to Aro." _Slow down, Bella-we still have a ways to go._"Once they determined that Jasper was in Volterra, Alice immediately wanted to go and get him. I couldn't, naturally, because in order to get there quickly they'd have to fly commercially. No way could I be around all those humans! So they went. But it was while they were gone that I started to figure things out. I was able to think for myself for the first time. And that's when I realized everything he'd been doing was a lie. So when he came back, I told them that I wanted him to leave. He's staying with the rest of the family back at their home, and I've been in the cabin by myself-for the most part. Emmett comes up daily to make sure I'm doing okay, and to take me out hunting." Yes. Believable. I could feel Edward relax next to me.

"I'm so glad. See, I knew my plan had merit? It worked even better than I'd hoped. And now we're together again, like we should be." I looked up, and I could see the city in the distance. This was it. With Edward holding my right hand, I reached my left hand in my pocket and sent one brief text message-_Now._We walked on for a few short minutes, Edward going on about how pleased he was, before she arrived. Edward had enough time to snap his head up to see her-but that was it. He was on the ground writhing before I had time to move.

"Thank you. Shall I help you get him back? Did you say anything to anyone?" _Did Alice know_?Without taking her eyes off of Edward, she answered.

"Yes, please. And no-nobody knows. Aro will be quite surprised when this drops in on his doorstep." I still didn't like her, but this wouldn't be possible without her. I carried Edward, which was weird all in its own, back to the castle. And Jane was right-Aro was indeed surprised. But Jane hadn't let Edward up yet-I almost felt bad for the pain he was in.

"Jane! What's the meaning of this!" he cried.

"Aro, please let me explain. I'm hoping you can assist me. You recall what Edward did to Jasper not so long ago? I'm afraid he will try again. You said you wanted him-well, here you go."

"Bella! You're quite devious, aren't you? And what makes you think young Edward will stay? I can't force his hand as I did Jasper's-I have no leverage against him."

"Then kill him if you have to. But I don't want him near me or mine again." I was shocked with the harshness that I was capable of.

"Surely you don't mean that. I won't kill unless it's necessary-his powers would be a great asset to my family. But I will offer him a place, and if he forces violence…then so be it." I was concerned again; what if this didn't work?

"And Alice? If Edward agrees to stay, will you release her?" Aro smiled.

"I'm afraid not, young one. I'd like to keep her for the duration. Jane, let him up." _Here we go._ As soon as her eyes released him, he was on his feet and growling.

"Bella? What happened? Where are we?" he said, snarling. I didn't answer. Aro stepped forward.

"Edward, please calm down. Little Bella here has brought us quite an interesting proposition. You see, she was afraid you would attack her Jasper again. She's brought you to us." His head snapped in my direction.

"What? You lied to me? Why?"

"You hurt him, Edward. And I was worried that you would keep trying until you killed him, just to make room for me. I won't let that happen. I'll protect him with everything I've got."

He snarled. "_Jasper._" He spit the name. "He will never love you like I do, don't you see? Why do you keep this up?" And in his rage, he came at me. I crouched instinctively to protect myself, but it wasn't necessary. We were joined by a member of the guard.

"You've got to _stop_ this, Edward! You've got to stop! What's happened to you?!" Alice was on his back, pulling at his hair. It wasn't the most professional of defenses, but she was incredibly angry. Her eyes swiveled to me quickly. "And _you_! What were you thinking? Don't you have any idea how this could have turned out?" Edward tried to throw her off, but it didn't work.

"Enough!" Aro called, and Alice immediately stilled. "Alice-leave him be." She climbed off his back, and he looked ready to bolt. He turned back to me.

"Bella, can't you see?" he asked, pleading.

"Edward, I need you to listen to me. And I'm only going to say this one more time. I do not want you. I am in love with Jasper. And I suggest that you stay here for a while, because if you so much as come near my family again, I will not hesitate to kill you. And don't dare think that I couldn't." I growled at the end. He turned his head to the side, surveying me.

"I won't ever give up."

"Please, Edward, can't you just…leave me alone?" I felt so defeated. "It's what I want."

"No, it's not. But I'll tell you what-I'll leave you alone. For now. I'll stay here, like you want-to show you that I would in fact do anything for you. But, when my time is up, I'll come to you. And you'll be ready for me." I just shook my head. I'd take whatever I could get. This would give me time to come up with a way to get rid of him when he came back.

"I'd be delighted if you'd stay with your dear sister." Aro said, his eyes sparkling. I'd just given him the best Christmas present ever. Edward only nodded.

"Alice, I had to try. I miss you. But I'm going now." I couldn't stand another minute. This day had been enough for me.

"Bella?" Edward called. "I'll be back for you." I didn't even bother to nod. I didn't say any goodbyes, thank Aro, nothing. I just left. As soon as I was out of the castle grounds, I pulled out my phone. Jasper answered on the first ring.

"_Are you okay? Did he hurt you?_" he rushed.

"No, I'm fine. He's going to stay. But it didn't go exactly as planned. He thinks that, by staying, he'll be proving something to me. So he'll be back, that much is certain. But for now, we're good. We'll have time to work something out. I'm on my way home now."

"_Do you think you can get back alone? Are there many humans?_" always so concerned.

"I'm fine. I just want to come home. I took the back way out-no humans. I'll see you soon."

"_I love you._"

"And I you."

* * *

Jasper was waiting on our porch for me. When I came out of the tree line, he was grinning. He scooped me up in his arms, and I knew I was finally home. Whatever happened now, we were together, and we would get through it.

No matter what.

* * *

**Well, what did you think? I'll have an epilogue soon, and I hope this turned out like you wanted. I really enjoyed writing this. When I started, this was just supposed to be a little, short story to go with One More Taste. But, thanks to your overwhelming response, it turned out much, much better than that! Thanks, you guys, for sticking with me through this. You don't know how much I appriciate it. **

**My stories, Control and The Bella Swan Guide, will continue as usual. I also have a collaborative multi-chapter in the works, as well-we're not working with a deadline, and it will be under a collaborative pen name, so as soon as it's posted, I'll leave a note in one of my other stories.**

**Thank you.**


	26. Epilogue

**Hey guys, here it is! And look at that record time! I know it's short, but it's an epi, and that's how I like them. Short, and sweet...and maybe a bit mysterious. Look for a gooshy AN at the end.**

"Jasper!" Bella was bouncing around the living room radiating joy and excitement. And who could blame her? Today was the day Alice was to be released from her service with the Volturi. Everybody in the house was just as excited. Esme hasn't been able to sit still for hours, and that was quite a feat for a vampire. She promised to call when her plane left; she wouldn't let us come and get her. She was right-we didn't need to be anywhere near the Volturi. "How much longer?" she trilled at me.

"Calm down, sugar. She said she'd call." I smiled at the pout she gave me before she sat down on the couch. She rode out her newborn year in flying colors; afterwards, she decided she wanted to live with the family again. We got a pleasant surprise when Esme said she wanted to build onto our cabin rather than us moving into the house.

Edward didn't give us any more trouble. He stayed with the Volturi and, according to Alice he fit right in. He hadn't tried to contact any of us, either. We knew the time would come when he would try and come back, but we would cross that bridge when we got there.

Bella and I had also decided to get married-her decision, not mine. Alice was unhappy to say the least, because she really wanted to be there. But Bella didn't want any big production. She wore jeans, and Carlisle officiated. It was perfect. Knowing that I would be spending all eternity with her gave me never-ending satisfaction.

The phone rang.

The entire family was in the living room in a matter of a second. I picked up, knowing who it was.

"_I know everybody's there. I'm on my way!"_ Alice squealed, and the room erupted in exclamations of joy. "_I'll be home soon."_ I heard her hang up, because there was nothing any of us could say. So now we waited.

* * *

"Bella. Calm down." Her excitement was affecting me, and although I was glad she was happy, I was starting to feel like I was hopped up. Esme was standing with Carlisle near the front door, and they were both smiling. Rosalie and Emmett were further back, but I could feel their joy from where I was standing.

The door flew open, and there she was.

Bella was the first in her arms, followed very quickly by the rest of the family. Bella was sobbing as best as she could into her neck, and everyone else had a hand on her. I stayed back, enjoying the climate of contentment. She touched them all in return, smiling all the while. When she was able to break free, she approached me and placed her hand on my cheek.

"I can't believe you got married without me," she said, frowning playfully.

"I haven't seen you in years, and this is the first concern on your mind?" I joked, pulling her into a hug.

"Of course! I demand to see pictures, as grotesque as they're sure to be. I mean, jeans, Bella?" Alice chided. Bella only smiled and hugged her again.

"I'm so glad you're home," she murmured, and Alice's hand came up to stroke her hair.

"I'm glad as well. I've missed you all so much. How does a hunt sound? I'll fill you in on everything that happened while I was away." Murmurs of agreement filtered the room, and we all headed for the back door.

Edward's POV

"Aro! How are you this evening?" I asked as I walked into the main chamber. He smiled as I approached.

"_Well, young Edward. And what brings you to see me tonight?_" he thought. Aro very rarely felt the necessity to speak out loud to me anymore; this was easier and more convenient. He also enjoyed the secretiveness of it.

"I have a request." I said, and I had a feeling he knew this was coming. He merely tilted his head and motioned for me to go on.

"I'd like to take a leave of absence, if it would be alright with you." At this he smiled.

"_Would this have anything to do with your young sister leaving just the other day_?" he asked. And it had everything to do with that. I nodded.

"Yes. Aro, I think I'd like to go home. You see, I feel as though I should apologize for my past behavior to my family. I'd like to make amends." He watched me for a few minutes, calculating.

"Of course. I would love nothing more than for you to be at peace with your family once again."

"Thank you. I'll leave immediately." I gave him a courteous bow, and backed out of the room.

I made sure he didn't get the chance to touch me.

**Mysterious enough for you?**

**Thank you guys for going with me on this fun little ride. This story was only supposed to be a few chapters, but you guys gave me such a great response that I just had to keep going! So unless someone has an outtake they'd like to see-which if that's the case please let me know!-then this is it. I'll be working on my other two WIP stories, Control and The Bella Swan Guide to Getting Your Life Back. I'm also working with another great author on a collab that will prove to be pretty awesome, so look for that as well! **


	27. Challenge

**Wow. So…kinda left you hanging there, didn't I? *evil laugh* You KNOW I love the suspense and mystery. But you're right-it was mean. Shame on me. **

**So here's what I'm thinking. We ALL know Eddie is up to something, but I admit-even I don't know what! But I bet some of YOU do. So….**

**How about **_**you**_** write 'Epilogue Part Deux" for me? I'm dead serious here! I want your best-I want to know what you think our Edward is up to. Fast forward, get in his head, whatever pleases you. And send it to me, and I'll post it up (with props to each author that participates, of course!). Do whatever you like-free range here (just keep mah characters, well, in character if you please.) You're also welcome to post on your own profile if you like. (obviously) you can send it to my email: kitty_cullen at hotmail dot com**

**So what do you say?**

**You game?**

**KC**


	28. Epilogue Part Deux

***pouts and glares* Alright, fine! You guys didn't want to write an epi for me, so I'll just do it myself. *dramatic sigh* Really. I know I should have done this a long time ago, but I didn't. The point is, I got it done now. I also did not beta this-I literally decided and wrote this in one sitting, and felt like I should go ahead and post. I resolve things, completely. **

**Please don't hate me for it.**

**Thanks you guys, and check out some of my other WIP stories like Awake in the Dark, and a new sequel to Control coming soon!**

_Edward's POV_

I took a private plane home, simply to avoid dealing with passengers and their incessant thoughts. Having not seen my family in so long, I couldn't help but wonder how they'd take my reception. Forgiving? I highly doubted it. Carlisle, he would be the one to allow me the most le-way. He would want to see if I could be trusted again. If I was, as they said, 'myself.'

I was thankful that _I_ was the mind reader in the family.

I knew, for the most part, what had been happening while I was away, thanks to Alice. Her visions, no matter how hard she tried, always told me the story. Whether I saw them firsthand or through Aro's mind, it didn't matter. I saw the wedding…how beautiful Bella looked in her dress…and how happy they were together. I shook my head at these thoughts; surely she could see that he wasn't right for her? He had her so wrapped up that she would never see the truth. Clearly forcing him away hadn't worked. Now because of that, she was terrified I was going to come after Jasper again. I stayed in Volterra, like a good little boy, to show her that I would do anything for her. Alice kept telling me it wouldn't work, that I should leave them alone, but I refused.

She was mine, and I would have her.

It got to the point where Alice wouldn't even speak with me anymore, tired of my constant planning. I knew Bella. There had to be a way to get her back. I thought of throwing myself at her feet, begging for her forgiveness; which I knew she would give, no doubt, but what of the outcome? She would forgive me, but she was stubborn. She would tell me to leave.

Then I thought that, perhaps I _should_ kill Jasper, like she was afraid I would. It would have to be done quickly and quietly, a spur of the moment decision. Then I would have to go away for a while, so that it wasn't tied to me. And this was all assuming Alice didn't catch a glimmer of what was going on, which was definitely against me.

I considered having him eliminated-sending someone else to take him out. This, I thought, was my best option. I struggled with trying to see through the holes, deciding how I could keep it from Alice, because surely she would see. She was probably 'seeing' it right now, but not putting much merit to it. These are the thoughts I had for several years-she's seen them all. I knew that I could plan this as long as I kept my thoughts erratic and undecided. If I thought of other scenarios, kept moving from one decision to the other, she wouldn't know the difference. I could make the arrangements, and then it would be out of my hands. I could go back to the family, plead my innocence, beg for forgiveness, and pretend to accept Jasper and Bella's false relationship. I thought of other things as I made the phone call.

**In Forks, the next day**

They knew I was coming. Jasper was first, glaring at me with his arms crossed and spiteful thoughts running through his head. Emmett and Rosalie were next, followed by Carlisle, Esme and Alice. Alice was eyeing me speculatively, trying to see what I was up to. I didn't see Bella. If I knew Jasper, he had her stay in the house. I moved to stand in front of Jasper.

"I'm sorry," I told him, looking down at the ground. "I saw the wedding…how much you love her. I should never have interfered. But Jasper," I plead with him, "Can you see why it was so hard for me? Do you know how much _I_ love _her?" _Jasper's eyes didn't soften, and he only nodded. "While I was away…I came to terms with it. I will always love her, no matter what. But…she is yours." I looked past him to Carlisle and Esme. "I'm sorry to you as well, for all the trouble I've caused. Please…Please can I stay?" Carlisle was thinking, as I suspected, that I deserved the benefit of the doubt. It was he who spoke to me first.

"Edward, that's not my decision to make. You'll need to ask Bella to stay." No surprise there.

"Of course. Where is she? May I speak with her now?" I said, more to Jasper than to anyone, since it would be he who decided if I could talk to her or not.

"I'm going to be outside the door. And if you so much as touch her, or she feels _anything_ distressing, I am coming in there, and I _will not_ hesitate to rip your head off." I nodded at him. I walked inside and up the stairs, finding Bella sitting in what must be her and Jasper's room. Peering around the corner it was like breathing fresh air all over again. She was so beautiful.

"Bella? Can I speak with you for a moment?" She was glaring at me furiously, standing in the corner of the room.

"What did I tell you before, Edward? Stay away from me and mine. What makes you think you can come back here?" she spat, tilting her head to the side.

"I was wrong. I was so wrong to interfere with your relationship with Jasper. I was clouded by my love for you-I wanted you all to myself. It killed me to see you with him. In a way, it still does. But being in Volterra, especially with Alice, I learned to cope with it. Her visions of you and Jasper were always so…pleasant. How could I deny something that makes you so happy? I'm happy for you. If he is what you want, so be it." I looked at her briefly, showing her with my eyes how truly sorry I was.

"What about what you said to me before you left? That you would never give up?" she was tapping her foot now-she learned her human traits well.

"I said it out of anger. And at the time, I meant it. But now? Now all I want is to be home with my family. I won't try to win back your affections. I'll leave you and Jasper alone. I just don't want to be cast out-sent away. I have no one else. Nowhere to go." I poured on the guilt. She narrowed her eyes and watched me for a moment before answering.

"Fine. But I swear to God, Edward, if you make a move at me, or do something threatening, I will kill you myself." _So many death threats in one day._

"Of course. Bella, you have to understand how hard it was for me to let you go. You were my whole world. And to see you in the arms of my brother? It drove me mad." If anything was true, it was this. I saw her eyes soften, and I knew I had won her over. She didn't move closer to me, but she dropped her arms down and her expression was kinder.

"I get that, Edward. I'm sorry for the situation, but I'm not sorry for how it turned out. Jasper is my life. If you can accept that, and leave it be, than you can stay."

"I can. Thank you. I missed everyone…I didn't realize how much this had become home to me. I'm glad to be back." She only nodded. It would be hard to win her over, but I was confident that I could. I turned to leave the room so as not to press my presence on her.

**Two weeks later**

I knew she was coming today. I pretended not to hear her as she circled the perimeter of the house, not close enough to give herself away but close enough so that I could hear her thoughts. I was, however, genuinely surprised that Alice did not see her coming sooner than she did. The rest of the family was out on a hunt, leaving Jasper, Bella and myself at home that afternoon. I knew when Jasper's phone rang who it would be. I was sitting in my room as I listened.

"Dammit! Bella-you have to get out of here. Now." He commanded as he flew down the stairs. He didn't know her that well, did he? To think she'd stay behind. I poked my head out of my room.

"Jasper? What is it?" I asked.

"Maria! Alice called-she said Maria was coming for me. She couldn't see her intention, but she's close. I've got to go after her." At this point, Bella had made it down the stairs as well.

"Jasper? What…Maria? She's coming here?" She seemed a bit shell-shocked, unclear of what Jasper's intentions were.

"Bella-go. You have to get out of here. She can't find you here! I'm going after her, but you have to get as far away from here as possible. Go to where the others are. They're on their way back-you should be able to intercept them." All the while, she was furiously shaking her head. I knew it was a lost cause before he did.

"I won't let you go alone!" She screeched, flinging herself towards the door in her eagerness for action. He shook his head, about to argue, before looking her in the eyes. Whatever he saw there was enough.

"Okay. Just don't make a move towards her unless I tell you to. She's skilled." He rounded on me. "Can you hear her? Is she close?" I focused my attention on acting like I was listening.

"Yes. She'll be here within minutes. I can't get a clear read on what she's thinking-only to get to you." He growled and moved to stand by the door. This effectively put him in front of Bella. I rose, as if I was preparing for action. Surprisingly, she knocked at the door before pushing it open.

"Jasper. How nice to see you." She smiled, and it was sickening. I could sense Jasper's nerves-he didn't like being this close to her. He hadn't seen her since she left.

"What do you want, Maria? You have no business here. Just go back, and there won't be a fight." He growled out, trying to reason with her. She laughed.

"Oh, Jasper. I'd much rather you come back with me, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen." She turned to peer around him. "And who is this?" That caused Jasper to unleash a roar, moving closer to Bella.

"Leave my wife alone and go, Maria." She snarled, and Bella crouched. Maria looked pleasantly surprised.

"Wife? I thought you were with another." She shrugged. "Doesn't matter. I'm here now, and if you won't come back with me, I'll have to do what I _should_ have done a long time ago. I wasn't sent here for no reason, after all." This is where she made a mistake that would cost both of us. She looked in my direction and smiled. Jasper didn't fail to notice, either. He turned his gaze to me and growled.

"You! You did this! I should have _known_ it was too good to be true. I should have known!" He wouldn't leave his post in front of Bella, but I knew what he was thinking, and he was serious about killing me. I heard a low rumble building in Bella's chest as she took everything in. She rounded on me, still crouched, and bared her teeth. Jasper, noticing her reaction, turned her attention back to Maria, lunging at her at the same moment Bella lunged at me. I should have known it was coming. I should have been ready.

She caught me around the neck, using her feet to kick me down to the ground and straddle me. Before I could get an arm up, she had moved her hands from my neck to my arms, effectively pinning me to the ground. She snarled, venom dripping from her lips as her black eyes focused on mine. I was so stunned…so caught up, that I couldn't even fight back. "I meant what I said, Edward." She growled out, leaning her face close to mine; so close that if I moved my head up just slightly our lips would touch. "You won't leave me alone. You can't let me be happy. I won't spend my life running from you." She hissed and moved her mouth to my neck.

Her teeth broke my skin, and the world went black.


	29. Epilogue the Last

**Wow, you guys are resilliant! I wasn't going to post anything after the final epilogue, but I got sooo many requests to see what happened to Jasper that I had to share. It's pretty short, but after the fight there wasn't much to tell. So here you go, with much love to all of you.**

**I had a fan epilogue sent to me today, and I'll be posting that as well. I was thrilled to see it-I love to get your ideas. **

_Jasper's POV_

I saw Bella lunge for Edward in the same instant that I lunged for Maria. She wasn't expecting such a direct attack; I caught her off guard. I heard Bella snarl words to Edward, and I felt sorry that she was the one that had to do that. She would hurt for it later, if I knew her at all. I gave Maria my full attention, pinning her underneath me with my knees and hands, much like Bella had Edward pinned. "This ends now. I'm sorry your life has to end like this." She keened a little, showing me the woman that she was, not the killer, and I felt a brief flicker of pity. Whatever had driven her to this life was to blame for her death. I didn't hesitate to bring my teeth to her neck and slice it through.

I wasn't sure how I should feel. I was glad she was gone. Her presence was like a weight on my soul; always wondering if she was going to show up, try and take what was mine. On the other, I had killed my maker. I felt the twinge of grief that accompanied an act like that, but I didn't regret it. But I wasn't worried about me.

I was worried about Bella.

She hadn't made a move, or a sound. I stood up and moved towards her; she was still sitting on Edward. I lifted her up and pulled her into my arms, stroking her hair. She looked at me, and I saw a new look in her eyes. Age. She looked as if she'd aged 50 years in the last 10 minutes. "I am…so sorry Bella. I wish that you didn't have to do that. It should have been me. I should have…" I choked on my words, unsure of what to say to make this act better.

"It had to happen. He wanted you dead. I couldn't let that happen. He never would have stopped. He sent Maria after you, Jasper." She was speaking in monotone; I could tell she was still in shock.

"I know. But it should have been me. I should have protected you better. You shouldn't have had to kill for me." She motioned over to what was left of Maria.

"You shouldn't have to kill for me either. But what's done is done. Jasper…I need a minute. Please. I'm going to take a shower. Will you…" she trailed off, but I knew what she meant. I nodded, setting her down. She moved sluggishly up the stairs and into the bathroom as I set myself to the task at hand. Before I lit the match, I heard the others arrive. Alice was first at my side, taking in what I was about to do. Her hands flew to her mouth.

"Oh Jasper. Oh God. I'm so sorry. Both of them? You had to kill both of them?" she was appalled. Carlisle was looking sick as Esme sobbed on his shoulder. But he didn't move to stop me. He knew.

"Not me, Alice. I only took care of Maria." The weight of my words set in and she started sobbing.

"Bella?" she asked, already knowing the answer as I nodded. "Oh no…where is she? How is she?"

"She's upstairs in the house, taking a shower. She needed to be alone. I understand that. I'm not sure how she's going to cope with this." I fretted. I realized I was still holding the match. I turned back to the others. "I'm doing this now, so if you want to go, now would be the time." Everyone turned except Alice. She stayed with me the whole time, holding my hand as we watched them burn. We didn't speak. A part of me would never believe I did this. "Alice…was it wrong?" I asked. She sighed.

"No. For Maria, it was your right. She has hurt so many. For Edward…you're right. He would never have stopped. He would have escalated. There could never be peace; Bella would never be safe. _You_ would never be safe. I hate that it came to this. So much. But Jasper, don't beat yourself up about it. And don't let Bella either."

**One Year Later**

The haunted look was still in Bella's eyes; I suspected that it would stay there. But she had coped, and once she understood that nobody blamed her, she moved on. It took us a while to relax as a family again; missing one of our members was hard on everyone. It was difficult to find that groove, knowing what we knew. But we did. She wouldn't talk about him, and I wouldn't make her. She would when she was ready, and I would be there for her.

For now, we were together, and we were happy, and we were a family.

There were no threats, no hint of violence hanging over our heads, nobody trying to take away one of us.

We were living.


End file.
